What Is Not Forgotten
by MuseDePandora
Summary: The year was 2250 and Humanity a wounded people. Still the talks and endeavors to secure a lasting peace and fledgling understanding continued. Duty, honor, and obligation would bind Neroon to a past not fit to be remembered yet not to be forgotten.
1. Chapter 1

**What Is Not Forgotten**

By MuseDePandora

**Disclaimer:** Babylon 5 is the brainchild of JMS and thus belongs to him and whoever he sells the rights to, which is not me in this case. This piece of fanfiction is written with the admiration and respect of Babylon 5's creator. I claim no ownership of his creations. Many characters appearing in this story are of my creation. Any similarity with anyone living or dead is purely coincidental. Since I am playing in another's playground to start with, feel free to play in mine. Though of course, I would appreciate being notified so that I may go read the reincarnation.

**Summary:** The year was 2250 and Humanity a wounded people. Still the talks and endeavors to secure a lasting peace and fledgling understanding continued. Duty, honor, and obligation would bind Neroon to a past not fit to be remembered yet not to be forgotten.

**Rating:** M for non-explicit adult themes and references to violence.

**Language Guide:** The seperate symbols I prefer to use to denote different languages does not work on this site, so I am using a different, less elegant, and less precise system here. Please bear with me.

All text written between 'these' is spoken in an alien language. Mattering on the situation, it can be either of three such languages used in this story. Those being: Vik, the main language of the Minbari warrior caste. The Centuari main language. And Adrihi'e, Minbari root language.You will be told when to expect the change.

All text written between "these" is English, the Earth language of commerce and diplomacy.

**Please Read Author's Note:** I absolutely adore everything Babylon 5. But I had always shied away from writing in the universe. I refused to do it until I had a story to tell and thought I could do the show and characters justice. I believe I did so with this story. I have always felt there was a draw, a charisma, to Neroon. As I was watching episodes certain glances, silences, moments called to my muse. Many "What ifs" began running through my head and were shortly playing together. Soon, I had an idea. Then I had a story. I like to twist canon and take advantage of lack of knowledge or denials, but I avoid breaking canon. Thus this story does not actually break canon. For example, Neroon speaks to a character about the species Pak'ma'ra. However on his first appearance in season one, he asks Garibaldi something to the effect of "What is this Pak'ma'ra?" See, considering that he was such a high ranking military officer and that in season five Delenn says that the Pak'ma'ra are everywhere, I find it extremely unlikely that he was unaware of the species. I thought that he might have known them by a different, Minbari term. That's why you will notice that when he discusses Pak'ma'ra in the story, he's always speaking in Vik and thus is most likely using the Minbari term. Though the majority of the story is not told from Neroon's point of view, in the end you will see that it is most certainly his story. The events in this story shape his exchanges and actions in Babylon 5; from his willingness to unbalance the Gray Council by becoming the fourth warrior representative, to his hostility with Delenn, to his interactions with Marcus Cole, and finally to Delenn's choice to set aside a place of honor in remembrance of Neroon. It is my belief that this story enriches JMS's wonderful world. The story is complete. However, I will be updating once a week, posting an average of five chapters per update. In all there are eighteen chapters. Thank you for reading and please enjoy.

**Special Thanks:**

**To Kaile:** She is the best reader a writer could ask for and the best friend a person could wish for. Also, she has my undying gratitude for gifting me with the full five seasons of Babylon 5 on DVD last Christmas. That is some woman.

**To Armity:** For being my beta, always challenging, and understanding me. Love you dearly.

**Chapter One:**

_"Narns, Humans, Centauri . . . we all do what we do for the same reason: because it seems like a good idea at the time."_  
- G'Kar to Sakai: "Mind War"

-----

The year was 2250 and Humanity was a wounded people, sick of war in the wake of their near genocide. It had been two years since the Minbari mystified their enemy by surrendering at the Battle of the Line. Earth was licking her wounds and keeping a wary eye on the Minbari, frightened beyond words that another misstep in their attempts to mend bruised hearts and fractured souls could lead to the Minbari's mercurial wrath descending upon them again. And who were they to say that the Minbari would not finish the job leaving Earth a dead world and Humanity only remembered as a people sundered by ill choices? It had been two years since Humanity had rejoiced with peace seemingly sent by God. No one really cared whose God. Still the talks and endeavors to secure a lasting peace and fledgling understanding between the two people continued, years after the Minbari ships left Earth's space littered with the shrapnel of the ships who dared stand before an undeniable force.

-----

Alyt Neroon was preparing tea as Shai'Alyt Branmer looked over the daily reports. Branmer was uncomfortable with the knowledge that had been imparted to him just that morning by Satai Menar. Of course leave it up to the Gray Council to choose one of the worker caste to give such distasteful news and equally distasteful order. They could not even stomach it but were willing to use it and his Alyt for their gain in standings with the Earthers.

_Valen knows why,_ he thought to himself while taking a soothing breath to control his temper.

Quietly Neroon placed the cup of tea before Branmer and sat on the edge of the seat to his side, ready to rise at a moment to protect or serve his Shai'Alyt and people. Branmer could count on one hand the number of times he had been able to catch Neroon so off guard as to look almost comfortable and he'd still have three fingers to spare.

He picked up the last report and looked at it blankly, wondering if he would ever get up the gall to tell his aide what was demanded of him. Branmer snuck a sideways glance at Neroon and he could tell by the stiffness in the Alyt's neck that he knew he was being watched but was politely ignoring it until the time the Shai'Alyt deemed to share his thoughts.

'Neroon,' Branmer said in Vik.

He looked to him with a calm expectancy, always ready for what Branmer was sure Neroon thought was another of the Shai'Alyt's theoretical discussions. Branmer sighed, dropping the report to the table in disgust.

'Neroon, how much do you know of our people's ancient history?'

Neroon thought a moment before asking, 'How ancient?'

'Before Valen,' he answered.

'Little,' Neroon responded, ' Such history was not part of my studies.'

Branmer looked away as his aide looked to him earnestly, thinking he was receiving another of his Shai'Alyt's lessons. He looked down and saw the tea Neroon had placed before him. He took it in his hands as a grateful distraction. Branmer blew on the tea to cool it and he could sense that his aide was becoming impatient. Neroon wished to receive the lesson, to learn and to master it, to better himself. Neroon always sought to better himself no matter how painful the lesson. He did all this to better serve himself, true, because it was undeniable that Neroon had ambition, but ultimately the warrior had a true heart that wished to serve his people. The same people who were now forcing Branmer to convey their orders, orders so unthinkable that Neroon couldn't possible see it coming.

'Before Valen, Minbari killed Minbari,' Branmer began in a tone he would use as if he were telling a story, safely fictional and completely benign. Neroon inclined his head slightly, showing that he knew this. Of course he did, all Minbari knew of this but Neroon trusted in the insightfulness of his Shai'Alyt and so accepted his words as needed. 'Clans clashed one against another, drawing blood and taking lives. When the war between two clans ended, there was a ritual where the victor offered a female to the other clan in marriage in hopes that they would never know war between them again. For through that marriage they were made family. The Gray Council turned their eyes back to the ancient ways when they declared a holy war against the Earthers. They now wish to end it the same way. So they look to the ancient ways before Valen to help make,' he paused with disgust at the thought, 'amends to the Earthers. They have chosen to enact this ancient ritual of marriage so that we may never know war between us again.' He looked to Neroon and saw that his eyes had grown wide, not yet angry as he had yet to accept what Branmer had said as the truth.

'How can this be? Minbari do not marry outside Minbari. It is wrong! It is -'

'It is the decision of the Gray Council, Neroon,' Branmer quickly reminded.

Neroon inclined his head lightly and –yes- there the anger began to surface. Branmer looked to his tea to politely let his aide get his temper under control. He had to look into his tea for a great deal longer than he had expected. However, he could understand; Branmer understood better the anger that was Neroon's right to feel than even Neroon did. Yet.

'What female did they find who deserves our scorn so greatly as to be chosen to stand beside a Human?'

'This is not to be taken as a punishment from the Council or from our people. It is a burden, a great burden and they do not deny this. They say it will show itself to be a trial of the soul and an instrument of measure for one of undeniably great character.' Branmer explained.

'Ah, then they chose one of the religious caste.'

Branmer looked to him with a stiff jaw; sure he was in store for another jibe at his mother's caste. 'What makes you say that, Neroon?'

He must have sounded sharp because his aide checked himself before answering. Still his answer was rebellious.

'For only one of the religious caste would accept that.'

The Shai'Alyt couldn't help it, he snapped. 'Who they chose will accept that for it is the word of the Gray Council! Understanding is not required, only obedience.'

He knew his aide had done nothing to truly deserve his anger and if anything deserved his pity. His anger was truly aimed at the Gray Council that would use ancient rituals from a less civilized time and any hapless servant no matter how much he had done to deserve their respect. Of course they said it was not a matter of respect but they were not offering themselves, were they? He took a calming breath and looked back to Neroon, who appeared dutifully chastised, his eyes downcast in shame at his words.

'It was the warriors on the Council who finally, under much pressure, agreed to the ancient ritual with one alteration, in a way to slight the Humans. We will not offer them a female in marriage but a male. For sake of time, the religious caste agreed, but did not let the warrior caste off for tainting their ritual. They convinced the workers and therefore won the vote that the chosen one would be a warrior, as it was us that did most the fighting. And that it would be one of powerful rank so that the Humans do not think that they are being played.' Branmer glanced at his tea and then, reluctantly, at Neroon. 'Do you understand why I am telling you this, Neroon?'

His aide paused for a moment. Branmer could tell that Neroon didn't quite believe they were even having this conversation. As Neroon closed his eyes, he could tell that the Alyt was silently wishing for someone to wake him. Still, Branmer felt that Neroon had yet to realize the truth. Neroon opened his eyes and looked to him with intensity.

'They aren't considering you for this travesty, are they?'

Branmer decided it was time to reveal to Neroon how truly personal this horror was.

'Alyt Neroon,' the Shai'Alyt spoke in a commanding tone and if possible, Neroon straightened further, knowing Branmer was now speaking to him as his direct superior. He could see it in his eyes, he was fighting it, refusing to think it possible, but Neroon was very intelligent and just at Branmer's tone, he knew. It pained Branmer's soul to do this to his much endeared aide. 'This is the command of the Gray Council. The Ingata will again enter the fringes of Earth space to meet the diplomatic shuttle Normand. There Senator Lucy Heber, Celina Amador, and Father Alexander will transfer to the Ingata. You will be given ten minutes alone with Celina Amador. You will then submit to the Rebirth Ceremony and the Human marriage ceremony.'

While Branmer had spoken he had heard Neroon's breathing increase trifold. Each exhale was shaky with repressed anger.

'Will she be leaving after the ceremony?' he asked with deceptive calm.

'The Earth woman was chosen for what she was as much as you were. She is the granddaughter of General Amador, one of the Earthers that led personally at the Battle of the Line.'

'He offered his own granddaughter to his enemy?' Neroon asked, not looking at Branmer but at the table before them.

'He died at the Battle of the Line. As did her father, Captain Amador. Once the representative from the religious caste explained the ritual to them, the Earthers thought it appropriate that the woman they chose be somehow connected to their version of a warrior caste, as high up as possible, as ours was. She also is what they call a "cultural cultivist." Apparently she observes alien cultures and records them for posterity. So far she has only had dealings with the Centauri. Though they say she has studied our people from a distance since the beginning of the war.' He could tell that Neroon really did not want to be hearing any of this about his wife-to-be. 'In any matter, though your marriage is designed as only one of show, she will stay onboard the Ingata to observe.'

A muscle in Neroon's jaw throbbed as he ground his teeth. Finally, he looked at Branmer and cocked his head to the side.

'Though we killed her grandfather and her father, she agreed to this . . .' He searched for a word for a moment before deciding. 'She agreed to **this**?'

Branmer finally took a sip of his tea and wrinkled his nose as he found it cold. 'Actually the Earth government said that when they presented the possibility before her, she grew quite excited. They also said that she wished them to express her honor at being selected to be your wife.' He decided not to say what else she had said because it must not have translated well. The woman couldn't possibly have meant what was said. Branmer glanced up to his aide who sat silently fuming. And if she did, well, Valen help the poor child.

-----

"What!" Celina heard herself go shrill with the exclamation, but she didn't care. The audacity of what they were even suggesting –no, demanding- of her was ridiculous. She looked at the face of General Avery and couldn't help it. She started giggling, raising a hand to cover her mouth when she found she couldn't make herself stop.

The old General picked up the few documents on his desk and pounded their end against the desk to straighten them. When he saw that she had yet to stop giggling when he set them down, he leaned back in his chair.

"I admit this wasn't the reaction we were expecting," he said blandly.

Finally, she was able to stifle the laughter but she still felt like it may break through her control at the least bit of provocation.

"And what exactly did you expect, General?"

"We thought you'd at least be intrigued. Celina, almost no body knows about the true life of the Minbari! They don't answer questions and when they do, it's only riddles, so really they don't at all. In your profession, this is the possibility of a life time."

"All I have to do is marry one of them. A warrior at that. Couldn't it at least be one of the religious caste? Maybe even a nice little worker; they're benign enough. But a warrior! Jesus Christ, General! Are you trying to kill me? And you don't even want to know what daddy would have thought of this. In fact I think I sense him rolling in his grave. Wait, they still haven't recovered his body, so it must be my grandfather," she got out of the chair she was sitting in and began walking towards the door.

"Celina!"

She turned and saw General Avery standing by the window behind his desk. He moved deceptively silent for an old man.

"Come see what I see," he said simply, looking out the window.

She sighed and gave the door one last look before walking over to join the general beside the window, against her better judgment. Somehow, Celina knew that this man was going to get her to agree to this ludicrous idea of the Minbari. Ever since she lost the two men she cared about most at the Battle of the Line, she had been searching for ways to punish herself. What was this if not practical punishment? Finally, she stood beside him. He pointed to outside so she looked. All she saw was the base. Some people were talking on a bench outside the cafeteria and she could see new recruits doing drills in the distance. Some hard nosed drill sergeant was yelling pretty loud. She thought that if she stopped breathing for a moment, she could hear him all the way over here and inside the cement building.

"Do you see what I see, Celina?" he asked and she sighed.

"I see drills and two privates flirting," Celina said simply.

"What would your grandfather see?"

She rolled her eyes a bit at this. "I don't know. He's dead."

"What would your father see?"

"General, please! They're both dead. They see nothing now but the vacuum of space and some very dark dirt."

General Avery looked down and gave a mighty sigh. "Celina, darling, I didn't want to ask you this. I watched you grow up out there." He gestured with his chin to the grounds outside. "Your father wanted you safe, that's why he got you that spot on that Centauri outpost. He wanted you far from home because he knew what was coming. God, we all saw it coming. From that moment those damn Minbari declared a Holy War against us. I spoke with your father after he got you to that outpost. He said, "God, General, I didn't want to send her away. I keep wanting to believe she's still my baby. But she's a woman now. And even when we're gone, as long as she lives I know she'll do the right thing for our people." And your grandfather, well, we both know how he was about duty. But that doesn't mean he didn't love you, Celina. He'd never force you to make the decision I'm wanting you to make, but he still would have wanted you to consider what is on the table."

"Remind me," she said simply, looking out the window to the recruits doing jumping-jacks in the distance.

"Once you marry the Minbari, you become an icon. Our people can look to you and know that you are securing our future. You become the hope that we have finally put the war behind us and the assurance that it won't come back. Look in the eyes of any Human, Celina, and you will see fear. We just can't believe that the Minbari didn't wipe us out and we silently all expect them to turn around any time and say it was just a ruse to make it even worse when they do decide to kill us. But perhaps you can help quail that fear. I hate to say it, Celina, but you are the perfect woman for this job."

"What would daddy have said," she asked, feeling like a child searching for truth that's so simple and sharp as to hurt.

"He would say that as Alyt Neroon's wife, you will be the safest Human alive," the General said.

"And what would grandfather say?"

"He would say that as Alyt Neroon's wife, Humanity will be safer."

"But humanity will be just as safe with another woman as this Alyt's wife," she pointed out.

"If you want to know, Celina, we already asked a dozen other woman with equal qualifications, but either those high place relatives that gave them those qualifications objected and protested or the woman wouldn't promise not to slit the Minbari's throat in his sleep. We've run out of options, Celina; after you the only choice left is to insult the Minbari by offering too below the Alyt's status or denying them outright. Oh, that reminds me, you promise you won't slit his throat in his sleep or otherwise seek to harm the Minbari, right?" he seemed earnestly concerned. But of course, if the Human woman they chose did somehow kill this Neroon, it probably would start the whole damn war over again.

"I promise. Anyways, I'm sure it's much more torturous than death for him to be married to me."

General Avery smiled for a moment but then looked almost sad, "So then you're agreeing to this."

"General, you've spent the better part of a half hour trying to convince me. Why do you look so sad now that I've agreed?" She smiled at him in hopes of lightening the mood.

"You know by agreeing to this, you are giving up any hope of love."

For a moment, her smile almost wavered, but she sensed that since her family would respect her wishes, whatever they be, he was the only one left to comfort.

"Don't worry, General. I don't believe in love like in all the fairy tales. So I suppose I'm lucky this offer came along, otherwise I would have ended up an old maid," she made a face, "or worse, one of those cat ladies. Of course, maybe I should take a cat onboard the Ingata, just to piss the Minbari off." Her words didn't seem to comfort him as much as she hoped. But what was she thinking? Really. Did she just agree to marry a Minbari? Dear God, she was out of her mind. "However, the opportunity to see this so far rather hidden culture is the chance of a life time and if it works out, I could fall in love with the discoveries. And who doesn't want to be an icon? I can't believe I am saying this, but go ahead and tell them I said something really bogus but flattering."

The general finally smiled while she moved around the desk. "Like what?" he asked.

She waved her hand in the air while she walked to the door. "I don't know," Celina said and then grabbed the door knob. "Tell them I will be _honored_ to be his wife. Oh, oh, oh! And say I look forward to trying to get close to him. Say that exactly or else it won't translate right." She smiled to herself and thought of the poor general telling that to the Minbari delegation. Celina had learned Vik while stationed on the Centauri outpost and knew quite well what she had said would translate to. Essentially, in Vik the phrase trying to get close to someone was the equivalent of saying that she wanted to bed him. With her luck, they probably wouldn't tell the Alyt. Too bad, maybe he was the type of Minbari who would have at least taken the joke for what it was. Of course, maybe he was the type of Minbari who would wish to take her up on that offer. She got in a nasty situation with a couple Centauri over a similar misunderstanding. That day she found out where the Centauri preoccupation of six came from. And had consequently taken a vow of silence on the issue.

-----

Thank you for reading. I would dearly appreciate it if you'd take a moment to make my day and leave me a note telling me what you thought of my story. If you leave an email to contact you by, I would like to thank you for reading and answer any questions you may wish to pose.

Please continue on to the next chapter . . .


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter Two:**

_"The third principle of sentient life is its capacity for self-sacrifice. For a cause, a loved one, for a friend." _  
- Delenn to Draal: "A Voice in the Wilderness #2"

-----

Since she and the Alyt were to submit themselves to wedding rituals almost immediately after their first meeting, Celina had been instructed to wear a simple white gown and white robe with the hood drawn. Her hair was pulled back tightly because the deep brunette color seemed to offend the religious caste Minbari that had prepared her for the meeting with the Alyt. Apparently, it was a distinctly inappropriate color for a female to wear on her wedding. She asked if Alyt Neroon would also be wearing white garments like she was for the ceremony. The Minbari laughed at that and gave her a data crystal that was filled with more data about the traditions surrounding this ancient ritualistic marriage than she had collected on the entirety of Minbari culture in her five year's research. She studied it in detail as their shuttle approached the preordained rendezvous point. Most of the information detailed acts that were ridiculously ritualistic compared to the few other cultures Celina had studied. One part took her aback when she came across it.

Towards the end of the Minbari Rebirth Ceremony, the participants were supposed to pair off and share with each other one secret that they had theretofore never shared with anyone. And if that weren't bad enough, they were supposed to exchange gifts that were of great value to the giver. Since it was serving as a marriage ceremony for Celina and Alyt Neroon, they would be paired together for this exchange of gifts and trust. Luckily, neither of the two would be giving tangible gifts to each other as they were offering themselves to the other as their gift. But that still left the matter of secrets. Celina wasn't quite sure what secret she would share. She wasn't the type of person who kept a great deal of secrets that no one else knew about. Deciding that it may be best to let her subconscious stew on it for awhile, she returned her attention to the information on the console before her.

As they began to approach the looming Ingata, Celina came across a side note in the information the Minbari had given her. It outlined an ancient sign of respect when one individual wished to show great esteem for another. In the past it was a necessity for one of lower status to perform this on first meeting of a superior. But it had fallen out of practice. Still it was connected to the ancient ritualistic marriage as the male used to perform the sign of respect to the female on their first meeting. As the female was from the victorious clan, it was a sign that the male's clan accepted the gift for what it was but they had not forgotten who the victor had been. Celina had been wondering what first words she would say to this Alyt Neroon and looking over the detailed instructions once more, she decided that she would show this sign of respect. She hoped that the Alyt would be pleasantly surprised. Celina snuck a sideways glance at the Senator sitting to her side. The older woman's eyes were glassy and wide as she stared out the glass view port in front of the pilot and copilot. Father Alexander was sitting somewhere behind her but she knew that he was looking at the same thing that the Senator was. Celina reluctantly turned her attention to the view that had frozen the Senator and priest in silent terror. The Minbari war cruiser dominated the space outside of the view port. It was monstrous with a beauty as sick as death. Celina's eyes began to gloss over like the Senator's as they approached the vessel seemingly sent straight from Hell that she had agreed to call home. The newsvids from the war flashed in her mind. Dozens of these Minbari war cruisers filling the sky outside each outpost, letting the various government officials get off cries for help and visuals of the dominating Minbari force opening their gun ports. But this was no sign of respect, each time it was an ironic prelude to attack. As they worked their way through Earth space the war cruisers cut through the Earth fleet as if they were nothing before them. And then they would target the outposts that no longer had anyone to defend them. The newsvid clips always ended in silent acceptance of death and fire. She dared not think of the Battle of the Line, otherwise she'd greet Alyt Neroon with a slap to the face instead of any sign of respect. Most of Earth would probably take silent joy at that but Celina doubted the Minbari would take it the same way.

Celina shook her head slightly to clear these unproductive thoughts and watched as the shuttle circled the Ingata to approach head on and better enter the docking bay. She noticed the gun ports of the ship were closed while the docking bay loomed open and ready. Unsure whether to take this as a sign of disrespect or perhaps an act wizened by their past experiences with Earth, Celina tried not to think of it. She had much more important things to think about, like what secret to share with this Alyt. Celina doubted that it would be good form to come to that particular part of the Rebirth Ceremony without a clue as to what she was going to say. She could always make something up. Deciding that that was an acceptable solution should the time come and she had nothing better to share, Celina smiled to herself as the pilots communicated with the Ingata while navigating the crowded docking bay.

They had to wait a few minutes after docking the shuttle for the bay doors to close behind them and for the room outside to pressurize and oxygenate. She heard the Senator and Father Alexander's harnesses snap open and Celina tried to unsnap her harness. After about a half a minute of struggling the Senator was instructing the pilot to open the hatch. When Celina began to grunt in frustration, Father Alexander noticed her situation and attempted to help. It was no use, the damn harness wouldn't budge. They tried for five minutes to coax the harness to open with no avail. Even the Senator tried her delicate hands at it, finally resorting to pulling and muttering how this was utterly undignified and the Minbari were sure to rub it in. Giving up, the senator turned to the pilot.

"We're going to have to cut her out." Senator Heber sighed and shook her head. "Can you please tell the Minbari outside waiting for us that we need their help?"

The pilot smiled very charmingly, but shrugged his shoulders helplessly. "Senator, neither I nor my copilot have the Minbari's permission to leave this shuttle while docked with the Ingata. Sorry, Ma'am."

The senator raised a hand to her face and pinched the bridge of her nose as if she were developing a headache. "Alright, while we're discussing this we're making Shai'Alyt Branmer and Alyt Neroon wait, along with whatever honor guard they assembled. I'll go get the damn Minbari. I can't wait to see their faces when they see our situation." With that, the senator gathered her resolve and left the shuttle to retrieve the waiting Minbari.

Celina threw her head back on the seat's head rest and silently asked God why he did this to her. After a couple minutes, she heard someone climbing into the shuttle. She looked down and saw a warrior caste Minbari peeking around the corner of the shuttle hatch as if he suspected a trap. He looked her over in a curious fashion, didn't even try to hide a smile and disappeared for a moment.

'The Earther woman is caught in her harness; tell the Shai'Alyt that we regretfully report that there will be further delay,' she heard the Minbari say to whoever was waiting out in the docking bay.

Then the Minbari came back into the shuttle and cautiously picked up the harness latch, careful to not touch Celina if he could. He bent down before her, giving her a glance that told her in some very gruff terms that this was not to be translated as anything but necessary to carry out his orders. Then he tried the conventional way of opening the latch, by pressing the two small buttons on the top at the same time. When that didn't work, he approached unconventionally by pulling on the latch. He was clenching his jaw and pulling with all his strength and Celina heard a pop and looked down to see the latch holding on by a thin hook of metal that looked like it was going to turn into flying shrapnel if she didn't unhook it. So Celina reached down and grabbed the latch while the Minbari continued to pull. It seemed that the Minbari had taken personal offense at the damn thing not cooperating and had committed himself to showing it the full wrath of the Minbari warrior caste. He wasn't even paying attention that she was trying to help him. So she really couldn't blame him when he pulled after she had wrapped her finger under the hook of metal. She was able to unhook the latch but the blood from her cut finger was surprisingly profuse.

At the sight of the blood, the Minbari grabbed her hand and held it out to the side and away from her very white wedding attire. The blood began to pool in her palm as well as falling down to pool in the Minbari's palm. Seeing that much blood didn't seem to faze him at all, but of course, he was a warrior and had probably killed thousands of humans in the war. She wondered if he had killed any personally and up close.

'Senaan!' he called.

A moment later, Celina heard someone clanging up into the shuttle. Senaan, a rather delicate looking female warrior, drowning in the armor and structure of her uniform appeared. She glanced at the blood pooling in Celina and the other Minbari's hands but then looked up to the other Minbari, waiting for her orders.

'Retrieve a healer immediately.'

She saluted him and left with amazing speed. The Minbari looked back to Celina's hand and then looked off into the distance, waiting for Senaan and the healer.

'Well, at least, I'm out of that harness!' she said to the Minbari with a smile. He just looked to her as if she were only being suffered and then looked away into the distance again. 'Do you think I'm going to lose my finger?' Celina asked with a twisted smile. The Minbari gave her a blank look and went back to staring into the distance.

This was not how she had wanted to make her entrance.

The Minbari that helped free Celina from her harness, Senaan, and the healer led Senator Heber, Father Alexander, and Celina Amador down various corridors to meet with Shai'Alyt Branmer and Alyt Neroon. Minbari warriors that they happened upon while walking down the corridors retreated to the sides to whisper amongst themselves once the group had passed them by. Celina strained to hear what they were saying but it was difficult to hear anything but choice words.

They were walking down one of these corridors when two such Minbari warriors, one male, one female, but both fierce came across them. Moving aside as the others had, Celina decided to ignore them, more intent on figuring out what secret to tell Alyt Neroon at the Rebirth Ceremony. She really didn't want to lie but if it came down to it she would, but what could she even lie about? Celina really wished that she had gotten to that part of the information on the data crystal earlier so that she would have had more time to ponder this very important beginning to their relationship. Not to be mistaken, Celina remembered General Avery's promise that she would not know love with Neroon but she hoped she could at least earn his respect. It would make the time they had to spend with each other infinitely easier. And that time was spread out possibly over the length of her entire life. Or until he died. She was told that Alyt Neroon was not a young Minbari but not an old one either. And now that Minbar was not at war with anyone, he was not likely to be killed. But it could happen. Since Celina was only twenty-two, unless she grew unexpectedly ill or had another more fatal interaction with a malfunctioning harness, it was probably going to be a long relationship with this Minbari. So she might as well try to make the best of it. Then she heard it and was torn from her thoughts.

'Earth whore.'

Celina stopped dead in her tracks and looked back at the two Minbari warriors that stood in the middle of the corridor behind her now that the group had passed them by. Father Alexander had been walking behind her so he came to a short halt when Celina turned around. He had heard the female Minbari warrior say something because she didn't even try to hide it –she obviously wanted the humans and the Minbari escorting them to hear- but he didn't speak Vik like Celina did, so he didn't know what was said. Sensing that they had lost two of the humans entrusted to them, the Minbari stopped, halting Senator Heber in the process. They looked to Celina expectantly.

"What are you doing, Miss Amador?" Senator Heber asked testily. It was obvious that she was still irked from the harness incident and then the blood incident. Really she was quite irate that this was not going as Earth Alliance had planned. Celina couldn't blame her; she wasn't very thrilled either.

But she couldn't believe that that Minbari female had just called her that distasteful epithet so out loud like that. And the Minbari escorting them were just acting like they didn't hear it.

"A problem, Miss Amador?" the Minbari asked, knowing full well what was her problem.

Celina knew that she should just let this go. It was best diplomatically speaking. What the Minbari female said was just illustrating her own pettiness. But the look on her and her companion's faces, utterly smug in their bigotry. She just couldn't let it go.

She raised her hand with one finger up to show that it would only be a moment. Then Celina looked back to the smug Minbari and decided to take a guess at the personality of Alyt Neroon. She guessed that he demanded a level of respect and fear from his crew. And that he wouldn't take kindly to one of his crew insulting him. So Celina walked up to the Minbari female and kept her face as blank as she could.

'We're on our way to meet with Shai'Alyt Branmer and Alyt Neroon now. Very soon after that I and Alyt Neroon will be married. Afterwards, I will tell my new husband of this kind welcome of yours. Still I wonder how he will take you saying that he is the husband of a whore.' The Minbari's eyes widened and she began to blanch. 'No, I don't think he'll take kindly to that at all.' Finally she flashed a wicked grin and turned back to the group waiting for her.

"We can go now," Celina informed them and the Minbari nodded and began to lead again. Both the Senator and Father Alexander looked to her curiously but turned and followed the Minbari escorts without asking. Quickly, Celina joined them, sure she had already made Neroon and Branmer wait far too long.

Finally, they and their escorts arrived at a long corridor in the heart of the ship. Minbari warriors stood at attention lining both sides of the corridor. At the end stood Shai'Alyt Branmer and Alyt Neroon. She recognized them from pictures included in her data crystal. Their escorts chose a timely retreat, allowing the three Humans to proceed on their own. Senator Heber continued down the corridor first, with her head held high and strength in her steps. Father Alexander was eyeing the warriors lining the corridor warily. He wasn't going to go next, so Celina followed the Senator. She tried to keep her eyes on Shai'Alyt Branmer, not yet ready to face the eyes of Alyt Neroon. Celina tried to look confident but inside she was growing extremely nervous and unsure of herself. The fingers on her left hand were nervously playing with the light filmy dressing on her bandaged finger on the right. She knew she should stop that or it might have to be redressed. It felt like she walked down that corridor for an eternity. But she quickly found herself behind Senator Heber and standing in front of Branmer and Neroon.

"I am Senator Heber. It is an honor to meet you both. Please forgive the delay, Shai'Alyt. We experienced trouble disembarking the shuttle," the Senator explained to Branmer, who looked extremely annoyed and as if he were barely tolerating all of this. Senator Heber cleared her throat after a moment of silence and looked back to Celina. Stepping aside, the senator took a hold of Celina's upper arm and pulled her to the forefront. "This is Celina Amador."

Celina gently pulled her arm from the Senator's grip and took a step forward and bowed to show respect. 'It is my great honor, Shai'Alyt.' Then she took a quiet but deep breath before stepping to the side to stand before Alyt Neroon. He looked suspicious of this and tilted his chin up in a prideful gesture, looking down the length of his nose at her. Celina quickly recalled the sign of respect in her mind before lowering herself to her knees before Alyt Neroon. He looked down quickly, obviously unsure of her intentions. She fisted her hands and then crossed her arms over her breast, bowing her head.

'Alyt Neroon, I yield to your authority,' she said simply.

For several seconds, she felt everyone's eyes on her. A disturbing thought occurred to Celina that perhaps the Alyt didn't know of this gesture. But now that she had committed herself to it, she could not rise again until Neroon made his move. She raised her head a little to sneak a glance at Neroon and the Shai'Alyt. It was difficult, because her hood was drawn but she saw that the Shai'Alyt and his aide were exchanging meaningful glances. Neroon didn't look lost so she hoped that to mean that he knew of the gesture. He just seemed torn. She wasn't quite sure about what. She didn't think it was just because of the marriage. Finally, the Alyt began to move his head to look down at her again, so Celina quickly bowed her head fully as she should've kept it until Neroon chose to take action. Her knees were beginning to get sore from the hard floor when she sensed Neroon bending down over her. Celina smiled to herself in relief. Not only did he know his part of the gesture, but he wasn't going to refuse it to scorn her. She felt his gloved hand reach under her head to place two fingers under her chin. He forced her to look up to him.

'Celina Amador, on account of our marriage I choose to share authority,' he said in a deep voice, filled with emotion, pride and conflict being there in heady amounts. He let go of her chin and offered his hands before him. She placed her hands in his own and he helped her rise to her feet, which was rather difficult, being in a long gown. Celina smiled tentatively to Neroon once she stood. He did not return the gesture but stepped back from her to stand beside his Shai'Alyt again. She glanced at the senator and saw the woman's brow was furrowed and her lips were pursed. Obviously Senator Heber was not pleased with Celina's display. It seemed to have worked out alright but the senator didn't like unforeseen occurrences. And she had been getting quite a few already.

"We will take ten minutes to prepare for the Rebirth Ceremony," Shai'Alyt Branmer said. "Follow me, Senator, and I will bring you to where the ceremonies will be held. My Alyt will make sure that he and Miss Amador arrive at the appointed time."

He looked to Neroon. Show the Earther where she will be residing in the ship. You should then have privacy for whatever you wish to say to each other. Arrive for the ceremonies in ten minutes, there have been enough delays today. Neroon nodded his head once, saluted, and turned to Celina.

'You will follow me,' he said simply and began walking down an adjacent corridor.

Branmer was leading the senator and priest away as Celina stood watching them all go. Glancing back at the rows of warriors lining the corridor, she came to the conclusion that she didn't want to be left in their presence alone and quickly turned to follow Neroon.

"You will follow me," she said to herself, not quite looking where she was going but more at the warriors behind her. "Yeah. Sure. Fine. But the first time you order me to wash your socks, you're a dead man. I don't care what I promised the general." Celina turned her attention to the front and saw Neroon just in time to stop before running into him. He was giving her a strange look.

'I do not appreciate others speaking in a language I do not understand when they can as easily speak in a language that I do,' he said matter-of-factly.

'I didn't realize you didn't speak English. The Shai'Alyt does,' she replied, worrying her hands before her. 'So I just assumed.'

'Do not make the mistake of assuming where you stand with me again.' Neroon then turned and began to stride down the corridor. Celina sighed and moved to follow.

The first thing she noticed was the lack of light. Not to say that it was dark. There were little sconces of light around the room and it was filtered as to be soft to the eyes. A sitting area dominated the small room and there was a remote console sitting on the coffee table. She walked over to it and saw that someone had forgotten to turn the screen off. In the back of her mind, Celina heard the door hiss shut behind Neroon. He didn't say anything, but just seemed to be watching her. She saw two boxes that she recognized as her belongings. One box was filled with clothing. One box was devoted to everything else. They had told her that was all she was allowed to take with her, as there would not be much room for her belongings on the ship. It was alright, she had parted with most of her belongings during the war. Towards the end, there was no way to contact Earth or any of her family so there was also no way for the outpost to receive payment for her food and residence. Consequently, she had been forced to pawn everything she could part with. Celina glanced over her shoulder nervously before walking over to the screened off section across from the door. She reached out and gently touched the screen where it seemed two doors met. Sliding it open, Celina saw something that made her jaw fall open.

Inside the room was a bed, big enough for two. But that wasn't what took her back. The bed was ludicrously angled. Celina heard Neroon come up behind her. He saw her looking to the bed with a look of shock and he spoke smugly.

'Were you expecting to sleep on the floor?' he asked and Celina turned to look at him. With effort, she was able to wipe the stupid look off her face.

Finally she found her voice and said, 'Once, while I was on the Centauri outpost during the war, I came across a young, rich Centauri noble. He was an incorrigible show off and liked nothing more than the attention of beautiful, young women. I was very young at this time, seventeen, just arrived on the station, barely more than a child. I wasn't really so beautiful as to catch his attention normally. But he recognized me for a vulnerable alien. He liked the exotic so he quickly gathered me into his harem for the night. I had just began my research on your people and didn't have much to show for my effort so I was thrilled at the opportunity to speak to this Centauri as he had just got back from visiting Minbari space. He boasted that he knew all kinds of Minbari secrets and though I thought he was trying to get in my pants, at the chance that he was telling even a little truth, I flirted with him shamelessly, drank some very strong brevare, got drunk for the first time in my life, and milked him for all he was worth. I was listening to him and taking very ineffective mental notes when he came to the point where he said he had snuck into the female billet at the Minbari settlement on whatever world he was on, I can't remember –the brevare and all-. He saw something before he was caught by one of the Minbari, who didn't find it as amusing as I did –I blame that on the brevare too, I swear it's the stuff of Satan-. Well he said something that made me take him for a liar and story teller. He told me that Minbari slept on tilted boards. I just thought that was ridiculous. So I stood up in the night club and said very loudly, 'No I won't pretend I'm your Narn sex slave!' but in Centauri. He looked so embarrassed that he couldn't move but also like he was going to kill me as soon as he could. Really that was an amazingly stupid thing to do, but I was young and new to the culture. I suppose I should have given him more credit.'

Neroon actually smiled at that and Celina was very proud of herself that she had cracked the Minbari's hard veneer. So he wasn't impervious to her. He had a charming smile, she had to admit . . . for a Minbari, that was. But it was fleeting as he quickly tamed it and looked away from her, as if silently fuming that he had let her sneak any reaction out of him. Really, it was good for them both. Neither of them wanted to be in the situation that they'd been forced, him probably more so than Celina, as she did ultimately have the choice. But after the marriage ceremonies she had it a lot worse than he did. He was still on his own ship, with his own people. For god's sakes, she was also forced to speak in a foreign tongue when around him. Celina walked further into the small room to continue her investigations. She came upon a door across from the bed and pressed the button next to it curiously. The door opened and she glanced inside.

'Oh! The bathroom!' She leaned in and looked around before turning back. To the side of the bed Celina found the closet, but inside were already someone's clothes. Celina turned and looked around the room again from where she stood and remembered the remote console that was left on. And inside the sonic shower she had seen a container of some kind. 'Alyt Neroon, we are sharing quarters? I was under the impression that our marriage was one of necessity and appearances.'

He still stood at the opening between the outside sitting area and the bedroom. Swallowing whatever it was that he was feeling the urge to say, Neroon's eyes looked skyward as if in search of the control he wished to exhibit.

'The Gray Council believes it is a necessity for appearances to be that we are living as it is expected of the married. They wish it to appear as if we are successfully cohabitating,' he said with a pent up aggression that set Celina on edge. If this anger or frustration or whatever it was he was experiencing kept building over while he was forced to live with her, it was inevitable that at some point he was going to lose control and all these pent up emotions were going to be somehow expelled. As he was a warrior, she expected it to be violent and as he was a Minbari warrior she was sure that she did not want to be the focus of that aggressive expression; Celina wasn't sure she would live through it.

'How long do we have left?' she asked and Neroon looked at her in a fashion that she just connected with him and they both realized that they had been thinking the same. At least he was aware of the fact that he would somehow have to express his hostility to her, her people, and this situation before it chose the time and victim for him. Neroon turned back into the sitting room and Celina moved to follow. He bent down and was looking at the active remote console, sitting on the coffee table when the thought occurred to Celina. She wasn't even really afraid, she wasn't happy about it but she was resigned. This realization was that Neroon would never express any of his frustrations with his superiors. And he would do all he could to keep from attacking another Minbari, verbally or otherwise. So that left her alone on the ship as the only safe person for him to choose as the focus for this hate, hostility, hurt, and rage.

'Four minutes before we should leave,' he told her, standing straight and frighteningly tall compared to her. Four minutes. What could she do in four minutes? God, it was all just going so fast.

'Alyt, I do not believe in love. I have known few good men in my life and they're all dead. So as far as I am concerned the part of me that dared believe in any man is dead with them. But in a couple minutes, I am going to be making some of the most serious promises I have ever made and though I can't believe my audacity, I am making them to you. I don't forgive you for the war. But you don't look anywhere near forgiving me. I was raised with the military, like you were. I know the necessity of war and to follow orders and to kill. It's not murder when it's war. It's a casualty.' She paused and slowly shook her head, wondering what she was doing, flashing back on the war. Finally she raised her hands to her face and just exhaled. If she didn't stop flashing back on the war she was going to cry.

'Then by what you say you believe, Dukhat was murdered and your father was just a casualty. Which is more unjust?' He was aggravating her in hopes of her losing control, in order to permit his loss of control. She sighed and fell into a chair. After a moment, Celina dared look up at him.

'Casualty is just a word a daughter uses when saying her father was murdered is just too painful to imagine. Casualty is the only word that separates me from an unbridled hate. And I don't even know hate of who. I've gone down that path, Alyt.' She took a deep breath and then smiled at Neroon. 'Thank you.'

He seemed taken aback by what she said and asked, 'You are thanking me?'

'Yes,' she said. 'Because now I know the secret I will share with you.'

That seemed to remind Neroon of the ritual that they were due to attend. He moved and looked at the console. Celina rose to her feet, knowing that it was time to go.

'I just wanted to tell you that though we enter into this agreement under extraordinary circumstances, I plan to keep my word. Though we will not have love between us, at least we can have respect.'

Neroon seemed to consider this for a moment before he almost against his better judgment said, 'How can I respect that which I detest?'

Celina looked to him sharply in pain at his words but she realized from his face that there was no intent to be unduly cruel, he asked out of true confusion of what to do. She sniffed once as she had been on the edge of tears a moment before and it helped her gather control of herself. Finally she decided if he wished to be frank, she would be.

'I don't know, Alyt,' she said, 'but I plan on finding a way. If this Human can do it, do you think you can?'

He glanced away for a moment as if wondering how to respond to what she was saying. She seemed to misunderstand his motivations; he wasn't rising to the bait just to answer her challenge. The Alyt had more self control than she had presumed. Of course, he had told her to never presume with him, so it shouldn't have been so surprising when she made the mistake again.

'It's time,' he said, turning his back on her and moving to the door. Celina followed but stopped at the door when a thought occurred to her. Sharing quarters showed her that her expectations of what she was getting herself into were subject to error. She decided to ask two questions in one. It would be interesting to see which one he answered.

'Alyt, will we be sleeping together?' she asked and Neroon stilled at the question. He looked down his nose at her appraisingly, wondering which meaning of that question she meant. Small traces of a smile appeared on his face as he formulated his answer.

'The bed is for us,' he said simply and Celina smiled, that it appeared he had a sense of humor about the issue.

'I've never done it vertical before,' she replied and for a half second he looked shocked. Then he let himself smile which gave her the guts to continue. 'But I suppose if the Minbari do it, I can too.'

Neroon tried to look serious for a moment, but it was too late, she had already eased the aura of tension between them. The fact that she was even audacious enough to begin and continue this thread of conversation made it surprisingly refreshing. He placed his hand on the middle of her back and urged her out the door, sure that if he didn't force her out the door, she'd carry on with this conversation. Out in the hall, she wouldn't dare.

'Is there a Minbari trick to it, Alyt? Because I think it would take some practice. Hmm . . .' She smiled devilishly to show that the hall wouldn't save him. 'I'll practice when you aren't there,' He looked to her sharply and took a hold of her upper arm to hasten her down the hall, 'so I don't make us both fall out of bed. Don't you think that's a good idea?'

'Minbari females usually practice during the night,' he couldn't help himself. There was still the ribald warrior trainee in him.

'Really?' Celina asked in a whisper when they past by a group of Minbari. 'I don't believe you. I think you just want to watch.' Then she started chuckling to herself. 'But following that train of thought when do Minbari males practice?'

As they neared the corridor where her procession of robed Minbari with bells waited, Neroon leaned down to whisper in her ear before he left, 'Some of us are born with the talent perfected.'

He left her laughing in the corridor with the Minbari looking at her disapprovingly and one even had the audacity to shush her. Celina raised a finger to her lips to show that she was shushed. Once she quieted, the bells began to ring and Celina was led slowly to where she was to be married.

-----

Thank you for reading. I would dearly appreciate it if you'd take a moment to make my day and leave me a note telling me what you thought of my story. If you leave an email to contact you by, I would like to thank you for reading and answer any questions you may wish to pose.

Please continue on to the next chapter . . .


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter Three:**

_"Nobody takes power. They're given power by the rest of us, because we are stupid or afraid or both. "_  
- Dukhat: "Atonement"

-----

Minbari religious caste seemed to have come with the Ingata in order to perform the Rebirth Ceremony. Apparently they didn't trust the warrior caste to do it right. Consequently, the circular room was filled with white robed figures. Even the senator had put a white robe over her business suit. Father Alexander was already wearing cream colored robes which Celina recognized from what she associated with Easter Mass. How appropriate, Easter robes for a Rebirth Ceremony.

It seemed like they went through twenty rituals before everyone broke off to retrieve what they were giving as gifts. Since no one else was supposed to know what was being given before the exchange, the gifts were wrapped in white cloth. Then everyone found their pairing. While Neroon walked across the room towards her, Celina saw that Shai'Alyt Branmer and Senator Heber were pairing off. Father Alexander chose the priestess leading the ceremony as his partner. She wondered what secrets they would tell but wasn't wondering long since Alyt Neroon caught her eyes and led her to the edge of the room.

There they looked around themselves and then at each other.

'Who goes first?' she asked quietly, as everyone was whispering, not wanting to be heard by the others in the room.

'What I have never told anyone is that I believe the Gray Council was wrong to order us to surrender on the eve of our victory,' he said and Celina turned away from him at that. It was a horrible thing to say, suggesting that her people had no right to be alive. Celina swallowed down her distaste of his thought behind the admission.

'At the end of the war,' she began and paused as she wondered if this was an appropriate confession for the beginning of a marriage. Then she remembered what Neroon had just said and thought that perhaps these kind of admissions were not best for marriage but were needed for theirs. 'At the end of the war, I was pushed down some stairs by a Pak'ma'ra. I hurt my back and I was given some morphozine, a very strong pain killer. I was very depressed about the war back home so the peace given by the drug . . was too tempting. I got addicted. After the Battle of the Line, I learned about my father and grandfather's deaths. I took all of the pills I had left. Thirty-two,' she smiled, 'I counted. I overdosed and then I woke up in an infirmary with a Centauri doctor hovering over me. He asked me about the overdose and I told him that I just wanted a bit of peace, I wasn't trying to kill myself. I told my mother that. I told everyone that. But the thing that I have never told anyone is that I was looking for peace . . . with my father and grandfather. I overdosed on purpose. I wanted to die.'

Neroon looked at her silently for a moment, as if unsure how to react to what she had just said. But then he realized that he wasn't supposed to say anything to her about it. At least not there. He looked over her and saw that everyone was returning to the center of the room to finish the ceremony. Celina looked over her shoulder and saw that that part was over. Both of them returned to the center, standing opposite each other.

The Minbari priestess spoke in a melodic and lulling voice. She described Valen calling forth the Gray Council. This seemed kind of ironic to Celina with what Neroon had just told her.

'Will you follow me into fire, into storm, into darkness,' the priestess paused dramatically, 'into death? And the nine said, 'Yes.' Then do it in testimony to the one who will follow, who will bring death, couched in the promise of new life, and renewal, disguised as defeat.'

A Minbari went through the small gathering with a triangular crystal basket filled with red fruit. Celina watched as the Minbari offered the basket out to Neroon. The Alyt took the fruit, then looked to the ceiling, searching for whatever control he had been searching for since she had arrived. Then their eyes caught over the alter the priestess stood behind. The Minbari appeared before her with the fruit and she quickly took one and then sought out Neroon's eyes once again. It was important that they kept their eyes locked during this ending part. Everyone else was attempting to make sure they gave no one else any significant looks as only those marrying were supposed to do this.

'From birth, through death and renewal, you must put aside old things, old fears, old lives, this is your death, the death of flesh, the death of pain, the death of yesterday. Taste of it, and be not afraid, for I am with you to the end of time. Taste of it.'

Everyone placed the fruit in their mouth. Celina watched as Neroon placed the small fruit in his mouth and then began to chew. She was so intent on watching Neroon eat the fruit, that it was several seconds before she remembered to eat her own. As if she had been waiting for Celina to eat the fruit, the priestess said dramatically, 'And so it begins.' Then they shook some bells and a chill ran down her spine as she realized that, as far as the Minbari were concerned, it was done. Neroon gave her a strange look, as if he realized exactly what she did, then he tore his eyes from hers and walked to stand before the altar. The Minbari were quickly clearing away all instruments from the ceremony. Father Alexander moved to stand in front of the altar. Everyone looked to her once the Minbari were finished clearing the altar. She flashed a look at the door and then looked back at Neroon. He smiled smugly, as if daring his new wife to flee now that they were going to make it legitimate before her people. Smiling back to say that she wasn't going to give him the pleasure, she moved to his side and looked to Father Alexander.

"Are you ready, child?" the priest asked and Celina looked to Neroon.

"My husband and I are ready," was the first thing she said as the wife of a Minbari.

-----

It was amazing how words could begin to bleed together as one already knew their meaning and outcome. Celina knew she should pay attention so as the Minbari priestess that had performed the Rebirth Ceremony translated what Father Alexander was asking of Alyt Neroon ( "Were you prepared for what is expected of you?"), she forced herself to focus on the Civil Ceremony that was beginning. Celina ignored the priestess as she translated what Father Alexander was saying to those that did not speak English, specifically Alyt Neroon.

"We are gathered here today to celebrate one of life's greatest moments, to give recognition to the worth and beauty of peace, cooperation, and understanding, to add our best wishes to the words which shall unite Alyt Neroon of the Star Riders Clan, a son of Minbar, and Celina Amador, a daughter of Earth, in marriage."

Father Alexander looked out at the Minbari and the senator that were present. "Should there be anyone who has cause why these two should not be united in marriage, they must speak now or forever hold their peace." He waited for the priestess to translate for him and then he paused for anyone to offer objection. Then the priest looked at Celina and she could see that this was not what he wanted to do. He was being forced into performing this marriage as much as she was forced to submit to it. The only saving grace of this ceremony was that it was not being performed in the church, so according to the church, it was invalid. Father Alexander was comforting himself with this. With that in mind, he wasn't really binding Celina in this loveless marriage. If she changed her mind, she could return to the church and it would be annulled. But Celina smiled because she knew that not even the great Catholic Church would risk going against the Minbari. Still, it was nice that he was able to find such comfort that he was not really doing what he was. Realizing that he had paused for far too long, he continued, "Who is it that brings this woman to this man?"

Senator Heber walked forward, her pumps clicking on the hard floor. She didn't even pause, having practiced her words into her mind with such determination that they slipped from her tongue completely rehearsed. Any regret of what she was committing herself to had long been reasoned away back in her office on Earth, where she had first received her order. "I offer Celina Amador in marriage with the solidarity of Earth Alliance, its people, and her family."

Father Alexander nodded once while her words were quickly being translated. Her part fulfilled, Senator Heber stepped back to stand amongst the small crowd of Minbari. She looked strange against the backdrop of white robed Minbari, with Shai'Alyt Branmer a stain of color in his black uniform. Alyt Neroon was also wearing his uniform, but Celina supposed that she couldn't imagine him in religious robes anyway. He had already proved himself to be warrior caste through and through. Really, she couldn't believe what she was getting herself into.

"Alyt Neroon and Celina Amador," Father Alexander's words stole her back to the immediacy of the present. She looked to Alyt Neroon and saw that he was watching Father Alexander but still listening to the priestess translate. "I would ask that you both remember to treat yourself and each other with respect, and remind yourself often of what brought you together today." He looked between them and they both glanced at each other recognizing the significance of Father Alexander's words. Celina was sure that they would come back to haunt her. "Give the highest priority to the tenderness, gentleness and kindness that your marriage deserves. When frustration and difficulty assail your marriage - as they do to every relationship at one time or another - focus on what still seems right between you, not only the part that seems wrong. And if each of you will take responsibility for the quality of your life together, it will be marked by abundance and delight." Father Alexander waited a moment for the translation to catch up with him. He sought out Neroon's eyes and said, "Alyt Neroon, do you take Celina Amador to be your wife?"

There was a pause while Neroon was given the question.

'I do,' he said, inclining his head so that Father Alexander knew he had agreed before the priestess even translated.

"Do you promise to honor, cherish and _protect _her, forsaking all others _and _holding only unto her until death do you part?"

'I do,' he agreed darkly. Father Alexander nodded in acceptance, recognizing the word from a moment before. He then turned to Celina and she decided that it was best that she responded in a language that Neroon would understand if she were to be making him promises.

"Celina Amador, do you take Alyt Neroon to be your husband?"

'I do.'

Father Alexander seemed surprised that she was not responding in English, but quickly recovered himself. "Do you promise to honorcherish and protect him, forsaking all others and holding _only _unto him until death do you part?"

Celina glanced at Alyt Neroon, swallowed down a small part of her that was panicking that this was not right and looked up to Father Alexander to say with determination, 'I do.'

Then a fragile-boned religious caste Minbari walked forward with a board between his hands. The board was small, square, and draped with one of the white clothes that had been used during the Rebirth Ceremony. He came to stand before and between them, across from Father Alexander. On the board sat two plain, white gold rings of differing sizes. Neroon reached out and took the smaller ring in his left hand. Idly, she wondered if he was left handed. Then he held out his right hand and she placed her left hand in it. The four making the small little square of people saw that her hand was shaking. She was more than a little surprised because she hadn't realized she was that scared. Then Celina got embarrassed that she couldn't make it stop. With a surprising act of kindness, Neroon gripped her hand and steadied it, so that no one else would see as the ring bearer stepped to the immediate side, his duty not yet fulfilled.

'I, Alyt Neroon of the Star Riders Clan, son of Minbar, take thee, Celina Amador, daughter of Earth, to bemywife- to have and to hold, in sickness _and in _health, for richer or for poorer, in joy and sorrow. I pledge myself to you.'

Celina held her breath as he slid the ring on her finger. She had provided her ring size some time previously as she supposed Alyt Neroon did. With a sick feeling that it wouldn't, she just hoped that it would fit. She finally exhaled when it slid into place; a little tight but it fit. Now she just hoped his would.

The ring bearer stood before them again. Celina picked up the remaining ring and reached out her hand, still shaking, and Neroon placed his hand in her own, gripping it so it looked more like he was holding her hand up than she was holding his. The ring bearer retreated to the far side, no longer needed.

'I, Celina Amador, daughter of Earth, take thee, Alyt Neroon of the Star Riders Clan, son of Minbar, to be my husband - to have and to hold, in sickness and in health, for richer or for poorer, in joy and sorrow. I pledge myself to you.' She slid the ring on his finger and almost smiled when it fit.

Both the Alyt and Celina turned back to Father Alexander, no longer holding hands. The priest took a long breath in preparation of his ending monologue.

"Alyt Neroon, son of Minbar, and Celina Amador, daughter of Earth, as the two of you come into this marriage uniting you as husband and wife, do not forget you are also uniting Minbar and Earth in a binding of blood, and as you this day affirm your faith and devotion for one another, I would ask that you always remember to cherish each other as special and unique individuals, that you respect the thoughts, ideas and suggestions of one another." He paused and waited for the translation to catch up before he looked between them, Celina first and then Neroon, "Be able to forgive, do not hold grudges, and live each day that you may share it together - as from this day forward you shall be each other's home, comfort and refuge, your marriage strengthened by your devotion and respect for each other."

"Just as two threads woven in opposite directions will form a most beautiful tapestry, so too can your two lives merged together make a beautiful marriage. To make your relationship work will take responsibility. This is the core of your marriage and why you are here today. It will take trust, to know in your hearts that you truly want the best for your partner. It will take dedication, to stay open to one another - and to learn and grow together. It will take faith, to go forward together without knowing exactly what the future brings. And it will takecommitment, to hold true to the journey you both pledge today to share together."

He looked to the Alyt. "Alyt Neroon of Minbar," and he looked at her, "Celina Amador of Earth." Then Father Alexander did something that hadn't been in the pre-approved script they had been given. He reached out and took Celina's hand and then had the gall to reach out and take Neroon's. She and Neroon looked to each other as they both silently asked if they had missed something in the script. Father Alexander placed Celina's hand in Neroon's and didn't let go until Neroon gripped and held it. "With the power vested in me by Earth Alliance, I pronounce you husband and wife." Father Alexander put a hand over his heart and made a cross in the air. "Peace be with you."

Quickly Celina crossed herself with her free hand. Neroon looked at her oddly when she did that. Celina smiled at him and squeezed his hand. Reminded that he was holding her hand in a roomful of Minbari, mostly religious caste, Neroon dropped her hand. He walked away from her then to return to speak with the Shai'Alyt and senator. She was about to follow when someone gently grabbed a hold of her left upper arm. Quickly Celina looked back to see that it was Father Alexander. She turned to him as he obviously wanted to speak with her. He took a hold of her other upper arm and then bent over a little, to better talk to her eye to eye.

"Celina, I know I am not your chosen priest but I wish to offer you a bit of truth and a bit of wisdom," he said very softly, as to not be overheard by anyone. Celina nodded.

"Of course, Father. I am always thankful for the church's wisdom," she said and he smiled. After glancing over her head to make sure they were not to be interrupted, he looked back to her with an intense urgency.

"We have so little time between us, you and I," he said and she nodded. "But I thought that I must offer you something to remember in the course of this trial."

"You have already given me much to consider with the wedding vows," she replied and he sighed.

"Child, there are so many trials before you and you will be almost completely cut off from your people. I know you endured this for a short while towards the end of the war. But that was with the Centauri. Your husband, these people, are nothing like the Centauri, Celina. You will be swallowed in silences. You will be all alone. And if you fall, like you did on that Centauri outpost," Celina tried to turn away from him at this, she really didn't want to hear it, he pulled her back to him "there will be no one to catch you. Your mother and your friends have no power here. They have no rights. **You** barely have rights, Celina."

"You spoke to my mother." She took a step closer to him and said in a hissing whisper, "You're a little late, Father. I can't go back on this. Not now."

"I wasn't able to talk to you before this," he defended.

"You seemed pretty damn quiet on the shuttle ride over here."

He was silent and wouldn't meet her eyes.

"Father, give me my last rites now if you think the Line is going to happen all over again. Otherwise, I don't have the strength to enter into this with any more fears or regrets. I don't have the privilege."

"No," he said and sighed, "Just remember you are a daughter of Earth."

"I won't forget," she said.

"And that you're a child of Christ," he added.

"Good bye, Father," Celina replied, pulling herself from his hold and walked to stand beside Neroon. She looked to him and hoped to God that she wouldn't need anyone to catch her because Celina was sure Neroon would be too busy with everyone else.

_Did Valen help children of Christ?_, she wondered even though a voice in her mind, sounding oddly like her grandmother, was telling her it was sacrilegious. But Celina was sure she'd need them both for what was ahead of her.

-----

It had been a long day. Senator Heber and Father Alexander had departed to meet up with the main earth ship several hours before. A Minbari warrior had escorted Celina back to her quarters after the three copies of the Earth marriage certificate had been signed. There, he had curtly handed her another data crystal that he explained contained the user information that had been assigned to her for her access to the ship's computer system and data resources. She had accepted it gladly and the Minbari had left her alone. Celina wasn't quite sure where Alyt Neroon was but she supposed that she should get used to being left out of the loop a lot of the time.

For four hours, Celina had explored the personalized settings that the Minbari had programmed into her user access. She was also careful for what she searched for as she was sure that someone was getting reports of what she was looking at. Her neck hurt from bending over her knees to look into the remote console screen. But she ignored it as she pulled up the schematics of the ship, with all the parts that were restricted against her glowing red.

There was a whole lot of red.

Then the main door hissed open and Neroon walked past without even looking at her. She sighed, then said loud enough that he had to hear her, It looks like I am going to be spending a lot of time in our quarters or out in the corridors. And only the corridors on the third, fourth, sixth, eighth, and ninth levels. Oh, and I can go down one corridor on the second level. The one between the lift and the mess hall. It was too quiet so she stood up and walked over to look into the bedroom. He wasn't there. Celina frowned as she realized he was in the bathroom. Hiding.

_Hmm,_ she thought to herself_, can't hide forever. _

Celina walked over to lean against the edge of the closet. She heard the sound of the sonic shower so it wasn't like the Alyt was just standing behind that door, waiting for her to go to bed. Beginning to get bored after a couple minutes, she caught a glimpse of dressing on her right finger. She played with it a little before she noticed some dirt under one of her left fingernails. Celina decided to try to use her other fingernails to try to get it out. She got the dirt out from underneath her left fingernail but noticed that it had just moved to the other fingernail when she heard the bathroom door open.

'You know you can't –' she looked up from her fingernails and exclaimed, "Jesus Christ!" Without thinking she threw herself in the closet and closed the door behind her. There were a few moments of silence. It didn't even occur to her the irony that she was now hiding. 'Put some clothes on!' she yelled through the door at him. There were another couple moments of silence where she tried to keep the image of a lot of skin out of her mind.

'That was my intention.' From the sound of his voice he was standing right outside the closet . . . naked. She tried to push the thought from her mind. It just made her feel all weird. Not bad; she wasn't a big prude. Not good; she wasn't an alien luster. Just weird.

'Are you wearing anything yet?' she asked through the door.

'You see I was about to but then something happened,' he replied.

'What?' she asked a little sharply.

'You ran into the closet,' he said and Celina went quiet for a few moments while she worked it out. Then she groaned.

'Why don't you take the clothes with you in the bathroom?'

'There is no place to set them,' Neroon told her, annoyingly logical.

'Alright, it's not like I can see but what am I looking for in here?' She looked around the blackness of the tiny space.

'Sleeping pants. They are on the first shelf on the side wall.'

Celina followed his directions and began feeling around the walls till she came across the shelves. She counted them. At the top one, above her head, Celina felt around and grabbed the soft cloth there.

'Anything else? she asked.

'No,' he replied. 'I'm opening the door now.'

She kept her eyes where his head would be. Celina had decided she would act like an adult about it. She just wouldn't look down. As the door began to open, she kept repeating that in her head. He looked at her and she held out the pants to him. Neroon took them and then she did it. She looked. And Celina knew he saw her do it.

'Maybe I should take a shower too,' she said, edging by him to get out of the closet. Celina walked over to the bathroom in long strides. She heard Neroon getting dressed behind her. Tapping the control to open the door, she didn't have the guts to look back at him. At least until she had that shower. Quickly, Celina entered the bathroom and the door closed behind her. A half minute later, she walked back out and began digging into one of the boxes of her possessions. Neroon was sitting in what Celina thought of as the living room. He was using the remote console but he was watching her.

'Forgot your clothes?' Neroon asked with a touch of humor.

'Shut up,' she replied, storming back into the bedroom and then into the bathroom, nightgown in hand.

-----

It had to be very early in the morning. Celina wasn't really sure what time it was. She had taken a very long shower, dressed, came out and then proceeded to unpack her clothes. Seeing that it looked like it was going to be some time before Neroon finished at the remote console, she had hung her clothes by form, color, and finally level of favor. Celina considered unpacking the rest of her possessions but she really was very tired by that point. About twenty minutes before, she had sat on the chair beside the couch Neroon was sitting on. He was intently watching whatever was on the screen. The light and colors were cast on his face and for a time she occupied herself by guessing what he was looking at, depending on what was cast on his face.

'Are you going to bed soon?' she asked quietly, there was no need to talk any louder as it was very quiet in the quarters and there was no one but the two of them, sitting relatively close to each other.

'The ceremonies this afternoon took me away from my regular duties,' he answered. 'I am making up for that so I can brief the Shai'Alyt that we remain on schedule. I will not sleep for some time.'

Celina sighed, closing her eyes, and pulling her legs up on the chair with her. She tucked the edges of her nightgown in the creases of her knees. After a few more minutes, she admitted, 'Alyt, I am tired.'

He didn't even look at her but kept his eyes on the screen. 'You may sleep without me.'

'Oh, that's very magnanimous of you,' she replied, a little grouchier than she liked to admit. 'However it's not the sleeping part that is causing me a problem. It's the bed part.' He didn't respond. 'Alyt, if you keep this up, I will sleep on the floor. Do you want me to tell the Shai'Alyt that you made your wife sleep on the floor?'

Neroon looked up at that. He seemed to consider his options in his mind and then said, 'I will retire in a few minutes.'

'Thank you,' she replied and laid her head on the chair's back. Celina fell asleep for what seemed like a moment, then woke up with a start, and she decided that she had waited long enough. She stood up from the chair, popping her back in the process, and walked over to stand beside Neroon. 'Alyt, it's time for bed,' she said, her voice thick with sleep. He didn't even look up from the screen. So she decided to make him listen to her. She stepped in between Neroon and the remote console. Finding himself face to face with her bare knees, she was surprised that he didn't sit back. He just looked up to her with a great deal of annoyance.

'Move,' he demanded, looking back to where the screen would be should she move, as he expected her to. She stood exactly where she was. Finally, he looked back up at her and rose to his feet. There was very little room between the couch and the coffee table so they were standing nearly chest to chest. He looked down his nose at her and said, 'Move.'

A little scared, it took a great deal of self-restraint for her to hold her stance. She threw her head back so she could look down her nose at him and then said, No. I expect you to keep your promises, Alyt. You promised me you would come to bed. I gave you time to finish up whatever you were doing and now you _will_ come to bed.

There was a heavy silence between them for a moment, as Neroon kept looking at her with death in his eyes.

'During the war, I killed fifty thousand of your people,' he said with far too much satisfaction.

'I'm sure Dukhat would be proud that his people have bathed the memory of his name in blood.' Neroon's eyes widened at the audacity of her reply. She sighed and closed her eyes. 'We can fight another time, Alyt.' Celina opened her eyes and smiled sadly. 'We will most definitely fight about this. And I'm sure it will be vicious and dirty. But tonight is not the time. Do not forget you have made a promise to me. Please come to bed.'

She then turned from him and walked into the bedroom, calling for the lights to fade. Celina stood beside the bed and dared not look at the doorway, sure that if she did he would not come. Her heart jumped when she heard the remote console deactivate. She listened to his steps, very light since he was barefoot, as he approached the bedroom. He was behind her, she could feel it, so she turned.

'What if I told you I killed your father?' Neroon asked and Celina felt her breath be yanked out her body by his words. It took her several moments to regain her breath and several seconds after that for her to recover her wits.

'You did,' she replied and puzzlement spread over his face at her statement. Celina smiled sadly and continued, 'Just like I killed Dukhat.' He looked down appraisingly at her for that. She reached up and touched him on the upper arm, the gesture made more intimate with the press of skin against skin. 'Couldn't it all sleep now?'

He reached across her, pulled back the blanket on the bed and proceeded to help her climb onto the bed, making comments all the meanwhile that she sensed were somehow at her expense. Still, twenty minutes later, Celina laid in the bed looking at the opposing wall, with Neroon to her side, unable to shake the speculation of whether her father or grandfather were one of Neroon's fifty thousand. Would it matter? A very sad, broken part of her knew that it would. So Celina resolved to make sure she never found out.

-----

Thank you for reading. I would dearly appreciate it if you'd take a moment to make my day and leave me a note telling me what you thought of my story. If you leave an email to contact you by, I would like to thank you for reading and answer any questions you may wish to pose.

Please continue on to the next chapter . . .


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter Four:**

_"Earthers have a phrase: 'Keep your friends close and your enemies closer.' I believe they stole it from us." _  
- G'Kar to Na'Toth: "The Parliament of Dreams"

-----

Celina slowly came awake, hugging the pillow to the side of her face, and laying on her stomach. This didn't even seem strange to her but when she groped for the blanket her fuzzy mind realized that something was wrong. Against the urging of her inner child just to forget the blankets and give her five more minutes, she opened her eyes and looked around, trying to figure out what was wrong.

"What am I doing on the floor?" she asked herself and then realized that she was not alone in the room. Celina sat up quickly and saw Neroon fastening his armor. He glanced down at her but otherwise was paying more attention to righting his uniform. She quickly remembered where she was.

'Alyt, how did I end up on the floor?' she asked. Celina tried to swallow down the horrible taste in her mouth, which tasted like she had taken a bite out of some old carpet while she was asleep. 'Did I fall?'

He shook his head, 'No.'

She waited a few more moments for him to elaborate but he finished up his uniform and then moved as if to leave the room, 'Then what happened?' Neroon looked down at her, his eyes flickering below her face and up again several times, and she realized that her nightgown's strap was falling down her arm, causing the neckline to scoop dangerously low. Celina righted it quickly.

'You threw the blanket across the room, a couple hours ago. Said something about my people in English; it did not sound complimentary. Then proceeded to sleep on the floor,' he explained, walking out of the room. Celina quickly climbed to her feet and moved to follow.

'Do you always leave this early?' she asked before he got to the door. Neroon looked back at her with exasperation.

'The Shai'Alyt prefers to receive his morning reports during breakfast. He starts his morning very early, so I start my day even earlier.' He turned back to the entrance and pressed the access panel to open the door.

'Have a nice day,' she said, her hands clasped behind her back. He glanced over his shoulder at that. 'I know, I know, I can't believe I said it either. Go now, before I have more flashes of Leave It To Beaver. I'll explain the reference tonight. It'll give you reason to come back ala One Thousand and One Arabian Nights. What are you doing still standing there? I have too many things to do and so little time. Wait, reverse it, thank you. You know I think I'll decorate while you're gone.' She looked back at the room then at Neroon. 'I'm thinking . . .PASTELS! Really, Alyt, stop standing there looking at me like that. Don't you have somewhere to be? Have a nice day!' Alyt turned and left, shaking his head all the while. Left alone to her own devices, she began to realize the reality of her choice two months earlier. Celina knew her life would have to change but she was scared to reason out how much. Challenges were good for the soul, she told herself, and changes were inevitable. She supposed that she was just lucky enough that this change was for the better of her people. With regret, Celina believed that the part that was for her people's good was already over and everything else was just living with it.

-----

Days turned into weeks and Celina grew ever more sure that she was about to break. On the Centauri outpost, she had been cut off from her people, but she still had interactions with the Centauri, including at least a couple that Celina thought of as friends. Here, she started to understand what Father Alexander had meant when he had forewarned her that she would be swallowed in silence. She was positively drowning in it. Celina found herself walking down corridors knowing that she would be harassed, but was glad to find any type of distraction from the life she now found herself living.

Alyt Neroon was barely any help as he seemed to believe that he was fulfilling any obligation to her by sleeping in the same room with her for a handful of hours a night. Celina tried to not let it get to her since she liked to consider herself a strong, self-sufficient woman. But then the harassment she weathered started to threaten to get more physical. It used to be that just the brave ones would say vicious things, most of which she didn't understand, behind her back. However, seeing that they weren't getting disciplined for any of this, they seemed to take it as permission and started to do annoying things to her directly. They would group up and stand in front of her, blocking her path. It wasn't so bad really; she would just walk around them. Seeing that it wasn't really bothering her, they got a little more creative and began spreading out across the width of the corridor so she would have to squeeze by them, risking touching one of them, or ask them to let her by.

Deciding that she wouldn't give them the satisfaction of walking away and that she wasn't stupid enough to risk a warrior claiming that she touched him inappropriately, Celina asked them politely to move. But they just acted like they couldn't understand what she was saying through her accent. It wouldn't seem that way, but it was really frustrating when they started making fun of her accent and twisting everything she said. She thought it was so juvenile but it did exactly what they had wanted it to, Celina got irrationally angry. And she forgot how stupid it was to try to push her way through them. Five Minbari warriors quickly seemed to surround her but they didn't attack her, they just wiped her hands off them every time she tried to force her way through, saying incendiary things about her people and her personally. Out of the building of rage and frustration a feeling of her against the world developed and she thought that if she just got back to her quarters, she'd be fine, so Celina threw herself at a Minbari that until that time had just been laughing at the others' antics. She hoped she'd take him off guard, could break through. But it didn't work out quite like that. Celina didn't take the Minbari off guard. In fact, he had the full presence of mind to pick her up by the upper arms and toss her a couple feet away, the others stepping to the side so she would land hard on the ship floor. When she started crying in frustration, it must not have been fun anymore, or they realized the seriousness of what they just did, because they quickly dispersed in all directions.

That was the day after Neroon stopped coming back to their quarters. Half of her wanted to track down the Alyt and tell him what happened, but she didn't want to be known as a tattletale and she was scared that if she did that, he may not believe it was any of his concern since the Minbari didn't do anything to hurt her. And Celina wasn't sure she could take it if he looked at her with that look that said he couldn't care less. So she retreated to their quarters, not leaving for any reason, barely even to eat because Celina wasn't sure when the corridors would be cleared. She knew it was self-destructive but this whole situation was. In a way, she liked to make it worse, just to dig deeper in her hole.

On her fourth night alone, she was sitting in the dark between the living room and bedroom. Celina had set up the remote console to play a recording of The Old Man and the Sea. Though she wasn't reading she quickly lost her place while her mind ran in circles. Some small part of her that was still hanging onto reality noted that the door opened and closed. Celina wasn't quite sure how she knew but she somehow sensed that someone was kneeling down beside her. Still, she tried to ignore him, not wanting to talk, not wanting to explain, believing it was her right to refuse both. He wouldn't understand anyway. Celina just let him look, knowing he was just thinking exactly what everyone else was. She was weak. She was broken. She was pathetic. She was Human. He reached out and took a hold of her chin, forcing her face up to him, as he had done on their first meeting about three weeks before. He was looking at her. He was saying something.

'Celina Amador,' he was calling to her and if she had the energy she would have laughed because she was married to a Minbari that didn't even know what to call her. 'Celina,' he finally started saying and she thought, _Now that's better._

'When I was little,' she said, and he stopped calling to her, let go of her chin, but rested his hand on her arm. She cleared her throat quietly. 'My grandfather used to tell me that I could do anything. I still remember how he would take me in his lap and sneak me a candy and he would say, 'Celina, baby, women like you are one in a million. You are special. You can do anything. And you will. You got that from your grandmother.' . . . He was wrong. I can't do this. Not like this. I can't take so much abuse. But there's no choice now. No. There really was no choice to begin with. But I can't go back on this now. If dying would help my people, I would do it in a heartbeat. Because that was bred in me. Yet, who would have guessed that it would be harder to live for your people than to die for them . . . I have to. But I don't know how to keep it from killing me. And there's no one here to help me.'

It was quiet for a while, she wasn't sure how long since there was no way to track it. Finally, Neroon took back his hand and Celina knew he was leaving her. It didn't even hurt, because she expected nothing else. However, a moment later, she felt his arm wrap around her back, his hand tucked underneath her arm just below her breast. Celina looked up to him in surprise, not really seeing him but knowing that he was closer to her right then than he had ever been. He slid his other arm underneath her knees. A couple seconds later, she was being lifted in the air and Celina flashed back on being lifted in the air by the Minbari a few days before. Most of her wasn't afraid though, just puzzled. Neroon carried her to some point inside the bedroom, then pressed her against a wall. The hiss of the bathroom door opening warned her a moment before the light pierced the darkness and clawed through her eyes into her mind. He placed her on the floor of the sonic shower then turned it on. The feel of the sonic waves against her skin felt oddly comforting; she hadn't taken a shower for at least a couple of days. Neroon grabbed her chin again and made her look at him.

'Do you need a healer?' he questioned and she laughed.

'I need a priest!' Celina said back. After a few moments, she added, 'No.' He was unbuttoning her shirt but she wasn't really paying attention. With a thought, she grabbed a hold of his hand and leaned forward so their faces were uncommonly close. 'You know, Neroon, there has always been a part of me that believed my grandfather. Because he said so, I _can_ do anything. Doing otherwise would be letting him down.' She let go of his hand and allowed him to pull her out of her shirt and strip her of her pants. He left her in her underwear because they both knew Celina would feel embarrassed around him afterwards if he didn't stop there.

Neroon sat outside the shower with her. They said nothing for a time, only listening to the sonic waves. A part of her was wondering why he was doing this. He had never given her an inch where he could help it before. Celina decided that she really didn't know him well enough to ever guess as to his motivations. About the time that she had resigned herself to this, he spoke.

'Are you tired?' he asked and Celina thought for a moment.

'Actually, I'm hungry. But I can't go to the Mess Hall,' she admitted and Neroon looked to her with puzzlement.

'Why?'

Celina then explained the whole issue she had been having with a few of the other Minbari on the ship. She had only meant to tell him a little, but as soon as she started to talk she just ended up explaining out to the point where Celina had admitted the whole thing. It felt amazingly good to admit it all and it felt even better when Neroon looked at her and said, 'That won't happen again.'

He then reached into the shower and helped her up. Neroon left her standing in the bathroom but quickly returned with clothes for her to wear. As she dressed he said, 'I will go with you to the Mess Hall tonight. We will discuss this tomorrow.'

'Discuss what tomorrow? How I broke apart?'

'No.'

'Then what?'

'How to keep it from happening again.'

-----

At this time of night, in the middle of one of the shifts, the Mess Hall was very quiet. There were three Minbari sitting at a table across the room. They had quieted for a moment when Celina entered with the Alyt, but seeing as they were being ignored, they quickly returned to their conversation. A lone Minbari sat a short distance behind her, staring into the middle-distance. He was there quite often whenever she would come into the Mess Hall, almost always sitting in the same place, constantly staring off at something that no one else could see. He was always alone but Celina had seen a Minbari try to sit with him once. They said a couple words to each other and then he was left alone again. Celina thought he liked it that way. In a way, he looked the most at peace out of anyone she had come across on the ship.

'What's this?' she asked, pointing to a food on her plate. It was small and tinted a light shade of green, looked harmless enough, like tiny soft tofu.

'Flarn,' he answered.

Celina nodded and took a small bite.

'Hmm,' she hummed to herself. 'Salty. A little grainy. I didn't expect that. But overall not bad.' Celina pointed to another place on her plate. 'What's this?'

Neroon sighed. 'Various minced vegetables.'

She froze after the first taste, 'Does this have alcohol in it?'

He looked her over a moment before replying, 'Minbari do not consume alcohol.'

'Why not?' Celina asked, taking another bite. Neroon glanced away to the Minbari group across the room; they were gathering their trays and leaving. 'Is it a big secret or something?'

'It may not be wise to discuss with outsiders,' he said and she sighed, placing her utensil down with a little clatter.

'You know, I could have gone home after the ceremonies and we'd probably both be the happier for it. But they thought I could be some use on this ship. I don't know which government came up with that thought first, but they've ended up agreeing on it. So I'm set here . . . to observe, to learn, to help both our governments in some small way see each other's reasoning, not even necessarily understand it. However, every place that I might see something of significance in is restricted against me for just that reason. It just seems like bureaucratic nonsense to keep me here so they can say I am doing something but make sure that in reality to keep me from doing anything.' She paused and considered. 'I've been pretty open about my people even when I've had the urge to spite you and even though my own government would probably not want me to share so much. Still, I know almost nothing about you, none the less your people. Really, Alyt, even if you do tell me some great secret, who am I going to tell? You monitor all my outgoing and incoming messages. I mean if this big sign of cooperation between our people is an utter joke, then probably all the other overtures of peace and understanding are little more than jokes as well. Following that train of thought, Home Guard and everyone who supports them will probably win over popularity. And I'm sure there are members of your people who would also wish to seclude themselves from aliens if not outright start the war all over again. And if that happens, your people may be generous and allow me to return to Earth. Or they'll deem that our marriage doesn't count since I am not a Minbari and they'll arrest me, detain me, and probably execute me. And if they want to get real cute about it, they'll just have you execute me. If it comes to that, please just slit my throat. I think I'd prefer that way. Have no clue why.' Celina took another bite of the vegetables. 'I would swear they used cherry wine in this.'

'The Minbari system cannot handle even slight traces of alcohol,' Neroon said to her much surprise. 'It causes intense psychotic, even homicidal, rages.'

'Oh,' was all she could think of to say to that at first. 'Well, I suppose I will have to remember that. What's this?'

He looked to her with serious eyes, 'Are you going to ask me to identify everything on your plate?'

'No,' she replied, before pointing to another place on her plate. 'I think I know what this is. I interrogated the cook for the few moments I saw him placing out the food a couple weeks ago. He said it was some type of salad. It's really been the only thing I've been eating since I didn't know what anything else is. Now, what is this?'

'A protein substitute.' Neroon seemed to have resigned himself to her whims.

'You mean . . . meat?' she asked, poking at it with her utensil. It looked like cold, cooked beans.

'It has meat byproducts in it.' He smiled and Celina felt fear in the pit of her stomach. 'Try it.'

'Will I like it?' she asked and that damn smile set her on edge. 'You wouldn't let me poison myself, would you? Because that counts as murder, Alyt.'

'No, I follow the orders of my superiors and the Gray Council,' he responded.

'I don't know if that's much more comforting. But I know it'd be a lot easier to buy if you weren't smiling at me like that.'

Neroon controlled his face into a look of mild interest. Celina decided to try the protein substitute. She took a small bit on her fork and then looked to Neroon for any reappearance of the smile. Quickly, before she could reconsider, Celina took the bite and immediately regretted it. The taste caused an amazing gag reflex and she dropped the utensil and threw a hand over her mouth as she forced herself to chew. Her eyes started watering and she just knew she could not throw up in the middle of the Mess Hall, no matter how much Neroon deserved it.

'Swallow,' he had the gall to order her. Still, Celina swallowed several times as she was unsure when she was done as the taste remained. Neroon held out a glass of water. 'Drink.'

Once she had emptied half the glass, she gifted him with her best glare. 'You are going to Hell. I just thought you should know that, you sadist.'

Neroon had the audacity to shrug with a look that said he thought it was worth it. Deciding that she would find a way to get back at him, she moved on, 'You know you could have revolutionized the Pak'ma'ra culinary arts and disabled Humanity with this one food.' She seemed to have piqued Neroon's interests, so she continued, 'You could have given this recipe to the Pak'ma'ra (they'd appreciate it, because it tastes like something is five days dead in my mouth) in exchange for them seeking out and pushing every Human they come across down a flight of stairs. In the end, half of Humanity wouldn't be able to stand straight and the other half would be terrified at the mere mention of the Pak'ma'ra. See? Minbari win.'

'I'll have to remember that the next time we are at war with your people,' Neroon replied with a slight smile, not quite as scary since he wasn't telling her to eat anything.

'Don't mention it,' Celina said. 'Really. Don't.'

They were both quiet for awhile. Neroon sat back in his chair, his arm resting on the table before her tray. He was looking at her plate while she ate but Celina was sure that he wasn't actually watching her. She avoided the protein substitute like the plague but otherwise was happy to have a wider variety of food to eat every day. Celina was thankful for many things, one of them being that Neroon had promised to assure she was no longer harassed by the handful of Minbari that had thought it was their duty to prove that she couldn't take it there. The other thing she was thankful for, something that confused her more than a little bit, was that Neroon had returned and that for some reason he gave a damn about her. Of course, she really wondered why.

'Alyt.'

He looked up to her expectantly and she reconsidered what she was going to ask. If Celina really wanted to get any real answer, it was better not to ask him in the middle of the Mess Hall, no matter how empty it was.

'I'm done. We should go back to our quarters now.'

Neroon nodded and they both rose from the table. He waited while Celina put up her tray. She returned to him and the two of them moved to the door. There, they stopped and Neroon stepped to the side as four Minbari were already walking through the door. With a start, Celina realized she recognized one of them. He was the Minbari who had laughed at the other's teasing and had finally tossed her to the floor several days before. They caught eyes and he flashed a cautious smile at seeing her out of hiding.

'That reminds me, Neroon,' she used his first name on purpose to feign a level of intimacy, 'we have so much to talk about. But you're right, we should go to bed first.'

The Minbari finally saw the Alyt and the look on his face turned stony. It was her time to smile and she knew that it was a little gloating but Celina couldn't help it. She glanced to Neroon and saw that he knew exactly what had just transpired. He wasn't taking any pleasure from it, but wasn't stopping her. The Minbari's companions looked confused but moved aside so that Neroon and Celina could pass them by. She knew that she shouldn't take so much pleasure out of instilling fear in the other Minbari. But, of course, Celina supposed that there had to be some up sides to being the Alyt's wife. As they walked down the one corridor she was permitted in on the second level, she decided she would have to use this power only for good. Inside the lift, Celina felt someone looking at her and turned quickly to catch Neroon glancing to her sidelong. But he wasn't trying to hide it. She wondered if she would ever be able to guess what he was thinking when Neroon looked to her like that.

-----

The next day Neroon left per their usual routine in the morning. Celina spent the day composing a letter to her family and two of her friends, innocuous enough that whoever was screening her transmissions to Earth would not find them very interesting. In order to not worry those that cared for her, she also glossed over some of the less pleasant events of the last few weeks. Really all that would come out of their knowing is their concern intensifying and their anger over her situation and the Minbari worsening, but it wasn't like there was anything they could do. And, of course, Celina wasn't so naïve to not realize that her letters would also be screened by Earth Alliance for any usable information before handing the letters over to her family and friends. And if Earth Alliance found out about what happened and they had the guts to try to use it against the Minbari . . . It was not conducive to the peace she was sent there to help create. Also, it should have been all but taken care of. That took her a couple hours and the rest of the day she spent exploring her personalized access to the computer's data bank, getting a little more daring about her searches. Shai'Alyt Branmer's file was unsurprisingly off-limits to her. She attempted to pull up Alyt Neroon's file and found herself lightly chuckling about what she got. Still physically exhausted from the last few days, Celina took a nap on the couch and only finally awoke with someone standing over her. Waking up to a Minbari warrior standing over her sent a jolt of adrenaline through her system before she realized it was Neroon.

'Good, you're awake,' he said and she sat up, throwing her legs over the edge of the couch and rubbing her face with her hands.

'Alyt, if you want to give me a heart attack, just do that again. Otherwise, please restrain yourself. Thank you,' Celina replied and Neroon seemed to ignore what she said.

The Alyt bent over the remote console and inserted a data crystal. He accessed it before turning the screen so that Celina could see it from her place on the couch. Neroon took a step back and said, 'Do you recognize any of these Minbari?'

She looked over it for a few moments before scrolling down the screen to see the rest of the pictures. Celina glanced back at him before asking, 'These are who you think are the ones who were harassing me?'

'Are they the ones?' he questioned with a stony face and Celina turned her attention back to the screen.

'Alright,' she finally said, 'I recognize two of them. This one,' Celina pointed at the screen, 'is the one who picked me up and threw me to the deck. But I think he regretted it as soon as he did it. I think he just got carried away. And this one –one sec, let me scroll-. Ok, this one, now he's a bastard. He started it all and was just downright vicious. The rest may be them but . . .' She sighed and looked to Neroon. 'Now this may sound bad but I don't mean it as an insult. You see, I remember those two because I saw them very up close and personal. The others . . . well . . . they kind of blend together. It's just that you all look so damn similar. I don't want to say that these other three were involved because I don't want anyone that wasn't a part of it getting in any kind of trouble. I don't care if that means that most of them will get away with it.'

Neroon nodded and surprised her by sitting down beside her on the couch. They weren't touching but he had never chosen to sit so close to her before. He glanced to her sidelong before pointing to the screen.

'This one is not involved,' he told her and gave a command into the console and a new set of smaller pictures came up. 'These are the five that are going to be quietly disciplined for their actions.'

Celina turned to him on the couch and asked, 'You put that other one in to test me?'

'I put him in to test your memory of the events that transpired,' Neroon replied and took out the data crystal.

'Alyt, can I ask you something?'

He looked to her expectantly, so she took it as an invitation to at least continue.

'I don't understand why they did this. I mean, we've been under the impression that Minbari are much more . . . Oh, what's the word? I know what it is in English but I can't think of what it is in your language. Damn, I hate when this happens. You know, come to think of it, I don't know if I've ever learned your equivalent to the word.' She snapped her fingers with a thought and moved back to access the console. 'I think I remember coming across a Vik/English dictionary in this thing. One moment.'

Neroon waited rather patiently as Celina went through the data base. He seemed more curious than anything. She smiled when she found it. 'Disciplined,' Celina told him. 'I can't believe I didn't know the word. It's so big in the warrior mentality. I bet I learned it and just forgot it. Anyways, back to what I was saying. I don't understand how they reasoned why they did this. They seemed more loyal than that.'

'The problem with loyalty,' Neroon began to explain, 'is that it is subjective to one's point of view. Quite often, one may do something that may temporarily harm those one claims loyalty to, if in the long run one believes that it will be to the betterment of those one harmed.'

'So you're saying that these Minbari didn't see this as being disloyal? Alright, I'll buy it, but what was their reasoning?'

He seemed to pause at this, looking blankly at the dictionary on the screen. For several seconds, Celina was sure that Neroon wasn't going to answer. She hoped he would, but she doubted it.

'The Minbari on this ship are very loyal to their Shai'Alyt,' Neroon replied and Celina sat back into the couch, leaning on a hand propped on the couch's back. 'And consequently, they are loyal to me, as well. They are loyal to the Gray Council, but since the order to surrender at the Battle of the Line, and the obviously fabricated reason given as to why, the warrior caste has seen more of an opportunity for error or misjudgment on their parts. Especially where your people are involved. Dukhat is dead. The greatest of us. And now the nine are fallible before some of our eyes. Not quite as holy.' He looked to her and she stayed very still in his gaze, not wanting to disturb him in case he would realize how much he was saying and wouldn't continue. 'When a select few were told about the reason behind us rendezvousing with the Normand, someone told someone they weren't supposed to and since that person wasn't given orders as to whom they could tell, everyone soon knew. Most were incensed. Others confused. But all thought I was being wronged. They knew I cannot disobey the command of the Gray Council. However, if you should refuse to marry me or later could not stand being on the Ingata, you may leave and in a way I would be free of you. They are not undisciplined Minbari. They simply wish to take action for their Alyt when he cannot take action himself.'

Celina sighed and nodded her head absently. 'That makes sense . . . You know, this has to be the worst situation I have ever put myself in before. And believe me, I have put myself in a couple of real bad ones. But I was taught that everything in life is a lesson that we can use either to bring us closer or further from God.'

'We also believe that life is a lesson and that we must always strive to understand it so that our souls may in some incarnation achieve final enlightenment.' Neroon replied before looking to her sidelong, as if challenging her to remark upon the similarity between their beliefs. Celina decided it best to let it stand on its own.

'Why didn't you come back?' she asked, hardening herself against sounding as if it had mattered as greatly as it did. It wasn't so much that Neroon had seemed to abandon her, but that she had seemed to have been abandoned by her only true connection to her source of power –limited as she knew it to be- on the ship. He was her right of passage and without him, she felt as a stow away. 'Did I do something or-or say something? I mean, I know we are far from friends and that you are generally only suffering me, but I did think that we were at something of an understanding.'

'It had nothing to do with you,' he said and Celina was relieved to sense that it was the truth. 'I did not return to our quarters because I did not have time to retire. There were several coolant leaks that we had difficulty locating and repairing. It was also most imperative that we fixed the origin of the problem. It took several days.'

'Ah,' she smiled timidly, 'I suppose I should work on not thinking everything revolves around me. People will start to realize how narcissistic I am.'

Neroon was silent for several moments, as if fighting against something internally. Finally, he looked back to her and asked with a completely blank disposition, 'What do you do with yourself when I am not here?'

Ah, she realized that he must have been fighting against whether to risk asking her such a question and perhaps having her think that he cared. Celina knew better than to think such a thing. Still, it did reason that he was curious. Curiosity was an interesting trait; one that she held in high esteem.

'Not a lot,' she replied. 'In fact, I am thinking of picking up knitting. Oh, what is that face supposed to mean?'

He didn't even have the decency to remove the mix of disbelief, humor, and hint of disgust from his features before replying, 'Nothing.'

'Liar.'

A deathly stillness swept over his face and a tenseness enveloped his body without him moving one muscle. Without thought, Celina froze as well, unsure of exactly what she had done, but whatever it was she knew it was very, very wrong. The moment seemed to stretch out in breathlessness and dizzyingly Celina's mind strove to figure out how to best resolve it. It only took her a moment to realize that it was her last, careless statement that had caused such a dangerous change between them and that she should probably apologize profusely and immediately, but as if disconnected from her mind's urgent demand her voice seemed singularly uncooperative.

'Don't kill me.'

It took her a moment to realize that she had actually said that instead of it being the tiny voice inside her mind. Either way, it sounded just as detached. He blinked and she took a breath that burned in her chest as the rage in his eyes seemed to flicker then fade.

'Never,' he said in a deep, insidious tone, 'ever call me that.'

'I'm sorry,' Celina finally was able to whisper and she was. 'I didn't . . .I was just . . . I mean, I was joking. When said like that, it doesn't mean anything in my culture. What does it mean in yours?'

The tenseness in his body seemed to ease away, to a degree. But, Celina was still alert to any sign of change. Idly, she wondered if she screamed if anyone would come. She doubted it. In fact, she doubted if he attacked her, she'd have the chance to scream.

'To lie is to place a stain upon one's soul,' he replied. 'To be accused of such an act is a grievous insult. To be accused of such by an outsider . . .'

She didn't need him to finish the sentence to understand the vastness of her mistake. 'I am so sorry. I didn't mean to insult you in any way. I was just playing with you like I would with any of my friends. I'm sorry. I forgot that you . . . weren't.'

He inclined his head ever so slightly, his eyes intense upon her. But they were always heavy with an alien intensity. At times, it was almost erotic. However, it was just as easily terrifying. Sometimes, it was hard to differentiate which she was sensing. Both caused a flutter in her stomach and a suffocation of her thoughts.

'For this once, I will forget it. Be sure that you do not,' Neroon said and Celina smiled though she knew it was probably inappropriate.

'I won't.'

-----

Thank you for reading. I would dearly appreciate it if you'd take a moment to make my day and leave me a note telling me what you thought of my story. If you leave an email to contact you by, I would like to thank you for reading and answer any questions you may wish to pose.

Please continue on to the next chapter . . .


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter Five:**

_"No Vir, the Universe is an evil place, but at least it seems to have a sense of humor about the whole thing." _  
- Londo: "The Very Long Night of Londo Mollari"

-----

A tenuous agreement seemed to develop between them. Neroon never made any promises but he did always return to their quarters, no matter how late into the night, early in the morning, or how short he could stay. She understood the importance of his duties and his position and their tolls on him and those around him, so Celina did not take offence when he was too engrossed in work to speak with her. It reminded her of the times her father would arrive planet side for the first time in months and yet he would be locked away in his office for days at a time going over documents that were too sensitive to be spoken of with the rest of his family. Her grandfather was the only one allowed in the office during those days. They could always talk together, since there was nothing that her father was dealing with that his father had not dealt with before or did not have security access to be privy to such. Celina still could smell the sweet tobacco from her father's pipe. He only smoked when he was worried. She had learned it was useless to worry about what was kept from her. He had worried enough for all of them. And she had to trust that if there was anything that she needed to know, she would be told. That mentality served her well now that she was in a similar situation with the Alyt. It had taken her several weeks, but she had learned that Neroon worried far more than he would have liked others to realize. Celina was sure that he didn't realize that she could tell. But she had spent endless hours reading or just thinking while surreptitiously watching him. She was very good at watching people, picking out little betraying habits of behavior that so often hinted at the thoughts of the observed. Neroon's habits were very controlled, very militaristic, and at times very alien. Still, she cataloged them in her mind and was over a stretch of time able to pinpoint patterns.

He rubbed his right thumb and index finger together slowly when he was worried over what he was reading. There were moments where he held his breath when he was angered, as if striving for control. Neroon would type a bit harder into the computer console when he was tired, frustrated with his fatigue or with the work, she was unable to tell. The last habit wasn't always telling in itself. Sometimes it was difficult to tell if he was typing harder or if the room was quieter. She would have to say something and use the extent of how clipped his retort was to see. It took her weeks to mark these few characteristics and be sure in her findings. Once she did, Celina was perhaps unduly proud of herself for her bit of knowledge.

She was sure that if Neroon knew how much she had learned from observing him, he wouldn't have allowed it. So, she kept it to herself. Celina wondered at first why he let her watch him. She knew he was always aware of it, as she wasn't that great at hiding it. No matter how little attention he was paying her –and she was sure that he was more aware of her than he let on- it obviously wouldn't take her ten minutes to read a page in her novel. It took her some time to realize that she was being observed in turn. He was much better at hiding it than she was. However, the realization came upon her one night as she suddenly remembered to turn the page in her book and then she comprehended that Neroon had been observing the same read out on the console for at least three minutes. His eyes were moving on the screen as if he was reading but there was something strange about it that she couldn't quite put her finger on. Then she understood. His eyes slid too far to the right when he was "reading" to actually be looking at anything on the screen. He was stealing glances at her.

'You must be looking at something quite interesting,' she teased, sure Neroon would be flummoxed by her statement. Celina wouldn't have even been surprised had he simply ignored it.

'Not at all,' he replied, continuing to scan the screen. A few moments later, a small, smug smile tugged at his lips and she knew that he was aware that he was caught . . . And that he had insulted her.

She continued to watch him. And he continued to let her. At times, he even seemed slightly disgruntled when she'd choose to partake in some other activity and ignore him. It was as if he liked being watched. It seemed he did have a proclivity to the vain. Alike everything else in him, it was tightly controlled. Still, it was most certainly there. At times such as when he spoke of his theories on the universe or how he thought things should be as if they were fact or his desire for others to find him intriguing enough to observe, his sense of self-importance was utterly plain for her to see. It was never a pleasant trait. But it was tempered by his other tendencies; such as his curiosity. He was always curious about anything unknown to him. It was a hunter's curiosity. The more he understood, the more lethal his intellect. At times, Celina would withhold things from him, not sure it was wise to give him so much insight into a people he had admitted that he thought had no right to exist. However, when she did, Neroon would sense it immediately and would press her until she had told him all that she had thought to withhold and perhaps a bit more.

Quickly, she realized that he had to be one of the most dangerous men she had ever been in the presence of. Worse still was that he had more than his share of charisma. Celina was strangely drawn to him in a manner that she knew couldn't be explained away as simply a fascination with what he was. She found herself fascinated by _who_ he was. And for a woman in her position, that could have been lethal.

-----

Celina was sitting in her customary position on a small armchair beside the couch that Neroon sat on, working on the computer console. Her feet were tucked beneath her and she wasn't even pretending to be reading or thinking of other matters. She was just watching him. Celina had awakened that morning in a queer and somewhat bold mood. Unfortunately, or perhaps not, Neroon had left very early that morning before she woke up and so she had no time to annoy him with this strange disposition. She'd spent almost an hour that morning examining the feeling. It felt like she had to do something, something was missing, and there was a strange urgency in her to fill it or to distract herself from it. Finally, she decided that it was cabin fever. Celina had hoped that it wouldn't affect her quite as poignantly as she had spent just under three years on a Centauri station floating alone out in the blackness of space and perhaps it wasn't. She supposed it probably could have been worse. This was just like an intellectual itch that she couldn't quite scratch.

Quickly, she had disregarded the notion to hole herself up in their quarters and wait it out. Once Celina had started thinking of rearranging the furniture, she knew she had to do something outside. She doubted Neroon would appreciate her idea of feng shui. Spending some time standing in one of the more frequented of her approved corridors, she eased the tension in her by watching the Minbari as they went about their day. She reasoned that it was for research purposes but in reality it was more a vicious need to watch others be as uncomfortable as she was. Normally this wouldn't have amused her for long, but she was desperate. Every Minbari that walked down the corridor took note of her. The looks varied. All were wary. Quite a few were hostile, but she was unsure whether that was simply because she was human or because they were all warriors. Some would notice her with a bored air and then dismiss her from their perceptions. There was one or two who almost seemed startled to see her, as if they couldn't fathom for a moment why there'd be a human woman just standing there. More than a few walked down the corridor several times over the period that she stood watch. One stopped at a point and watched her suspiciously after he came across her for the third time in a little over two hours. He just watched her and she watched him. Celina smiled and he frowned. He disappeared but returned a couple minutes later with another warrior. They both looked at each other and whispered. From the words that she caught the one warrior was suspicious that she was up to something and he had dragged the other one out into the corridor to get his opinion. The other warrior looked her over in a bored manner for a moment then looked to his companion with an expression that said that he thought the other was being overly critical. Then he walked away, back to whatever duties the other had pulled him away from. Left alone with her in the corridor, he gave her a withering look that promised that if she were up to anything, he'd find out. That was the most interesting thing that happened for nearly an hour. Minbari continued to crisscross through the corridor. Some ignored her to the point that they even spoke together in front of her. When she was finally starting to get tired of standing on her feet, a Minbari walked down the corridor for the third time in ten minutes. He walked as if he was going about normal business, but he watched her with a strange look that she couldn't quite identify. Celina was curious how many times he would follow this routine before either confronting her or calling security on her. She was slightly surprised that no one had called them yet. However, once she thought of what whoever reported her would have to report – 'The human woman is standing in the corridor. Yes, just standing there. No, she hasn't done anything but she's giving us all the screaming willies!'- she decided that security would probably think it below them to respond to such claims. Some time went by and that particular Minbari didn't return to the corridor. It must have been nearly twenty minutes later and Celina was about to give up to head to the Mess Hall when the Minbari turned the corner on the corridor and then stood his ground, looking her straight in the eye. She took an involuntary step back as he strode down the corridor straight at her. Belatedly, Celina wondered if he was part of security. He stopped just over an arm's length in front of her. None of the Minbari had approached her so closely. It scared her when she realized her back was to the wall. It was slightly warm under her touch. That seemed odd and she started to theorize why that would be, when the Minbari spoke.

'Do you need help?' He spoke a bit slowly, as if not holding out hope that she understood what he said but that if he said it a bit more clearly, she may. The question sounded a bit harsh but Vik was a harsh language.

'No,' she replied. He paused for a moment, leaning back in thought before leaning forward again to speak.

'Then what do you think you are doing?' He sounded almost conspiratorial.

She smiled and had a response on the tip of her tongue when Celina thought to be surer of what she was dealing with. 'Are you with security?'

'I am a healer.'

'In that case,' she smiled again, 'I am conducting research.'

'What is your goal?' he asked, leaning back again as two more Minbari walked down the corridor. Celina withheld her response until they had disappeared around the corner.

'Seeing if I can rile the natives, I suppose. I don't really have a set hypothesis. It's more a collection of raw data.'

'Anything of particular interest?' His face was tightly controlled but the edges of his eyes were slightly crinkled, as if he were smiling.

'I think all the nice warrior caste become healers. I have been standing here for over three hours and you're the first one who has taken an interest in me that didn't think I was trying to take over the ship, starting with this corridor,' she replied with a smug smile, that had she have seen it herself, she would've deemed it as a sign that she had been spending too much time watching Neroon.

'Ah, but do not forget that we healers are still warriors and we fight in our own way,' he said. She must have looked a little confused because he continued. 'We maintain the health of our people so that they may be stronger, faster, better.'

She giggled at the coincidence of his cultural reference. Celina was absolutely sure it wasn't purposeful. Somehow, that made it funnier. He looked a bit puzzled at her giggles but continued anyways.

'And we also study outsiders so we may better report their weaknesses. We are intelligence. We tell them how to best break you, how to best kill you.' His words were strangely proud. She knew she should have been at least a bit insulted by his use of referring to her as the enemy and perhaps that was exactly why he had done so. Still, Celina couldn't bring it in her self to be truly upset. For some reason, she laughed a little though she wasn't certain why. 'You are not upset.'

'No,' she replied. 'Because though I am many things, I am not a hypocrite.' He looked intrigued and a bit wary. 'You see, though a part of me would like to be upset with you that you helped kill my people through your research, I don't think it's right for you to be upset with me. I studied your people during the war for the exact same reason. I didn't feel sorry in the least that my research was being used in an attempt to kill you. I'm still not sorry. And I can't expect you to be either.'

'I see,' he said, almost to himself, looking away for a moment before back at her. 'You must now have access to a wealth of information on my people that you didn't before.'

'Yes, though I think all the interesting parts are off limits. But,' she pursed her lips and shrugged, 'can't have everything.'

'Are you continuing your research?'

That was a tricky question to answer. He had obviously asked it more to test how deftly she'd reply, than for her actual response.

'I endeavor now to secure a peace between us. I will do almost anything to keep it that way.'

He nodded his head in acceptance of her answer, seemingly pleased with it.

'And you,' she drew back his attention, 'you must now have my full medical record.'

'Yes,' he replied guardedly.

'Still continuing your research?' she dared ask. There was a long silence.

'The better to ensure your continued good health,' he answered. Celina thought it a very careful response. 'However, I have not had the chance to examine you. I thought to contact you in the upcoming days. It seems I will not need to. Since you do not appear to have other pressing matters, follow me and I will perform a thorough examination.' He turned and began walking the way he came, expecting her to follow. Once she reached his side and they were turning the corner, he said, 'I have never had the opportunity to examine a specimen of your people. Alive, of course.'

'Of course,' she retorted with some sarcasm that seemed lost to him as he was already tallying off the different tests he had thought to run. It was only as she was sitting on a cold examination table in some sort of flimsy gown did she wonder if the entirety of their exchange had been a ploy to get her out of the corridor. The healer seemed sneaky enough for that. However, now she was sitting in the relative peace of their quarters. There was a soft hum, barely perceptible, from the remote console and there were the taps from when Neroon would enter a command.

'Alyt?'

He slightly turned his head towards her but his eyes did not move from the screen. Celina sighed; it was the best reaction she could hope for.

'I have no access to Shai'Alyt Branmer's file,' she continued, hoping he was not so involved in whatever he was doing to snap out at her.

'Naturally,' he responded. It sounded almost bored, but not unwelcoming.

'Yes, I wasn't really surprised.' She allowed several moments of silence. 'However, then I accessed your file.'

Neroon looked up at that. He did not seem pleased. 'You were able to access my file?'

She smiled. 'Sorry, I misspoke. I meant to say, I _tried_ to access your file.'

'And?'

'I got some message pretty much telling me that I didn't have a right to your information and someone had been informed of my continued interest. I suppose I didn't get that message for the Shai'Alyt because I only tried to access his file once.'

'Was there any reason behind attempting to access my file six times?' he asked, glancing back at the console before returning at her response.

'Not really.' Celina paused for a moment before continuing, 'I was just really curious about something with you.'

'Did you ever consider . . . asking me?'

'Why do you think I'm talking to you right now?'

He slid his eyes to the ceiling before looking back to her.

'So, anyways, I was wondering about why the Shai'Alyt needed to learn English, but that you didn't take it upon yourself to do the same,' she explained. 'I understand that it would be advantageous for someone in command to know our language. You see, in everything else, you seem to take on the more unpleasant tasks for your superiors. I guess what I'm wondering is this: why did the Shai'Alyt learn English and you did not?'

'We believe that to fight effectively, one must know the language of war,' he said. 'Shai'Alyt Branmer led the war against your people. To better gather intelligence, he quickly learned your language of commerce and diplomacy. At first, I learned along with him. When he discovered that I was, he strongly suggested for me to stop. He said, 'There is no reason for you to learn what will soon become a dead language.''

'You know, I wasn't the first girl approached for this . . . position, right?' After Celina had said it, she wished that she hadn't. There was no reason that Earth would have told the Minbari that she wasn't the first and only woman offered a place in this diplomatic play. In fact, they probably went out of their way to make it seem that she was. Luckily, Neroon didn't seem to take offense. He simply cocked his head to the side, as if waiting for her to come to a point. 'What I mean by that is, what would you have done if your wife didn't speak Vik?'

'It seems I would be deprived the level of stimulating conversation I have grown accustomed to with you,' he replied in an almost sarcastic voice, but not quite as caustic as she had come to expect when he was trying to be mean instead of funny.

"How much English did you learn before you were stopped?" she asked. He was quiet for several moments before he blinked then answered.

"Enough."

"Damn."

This seemed to somewhat puzzle him.

'I kind of liked the fact that I knew your language but you didn't know mine.' Then a thought came upon her. 'You told me when I first got here that you did not know English.'

'I told you that I did not appreciate you speaking in a language that I did not understand when you could easily speak in a language that I did. That is true.'

Celina pursed her lips and sighed. 'So you knew what I said?'

'Not quite,' he admitted. 'But I have been studying your language since your arrival. I believe my grasp is tolerable.'

'Why?'

'I thought it prudent.'

"How many languages do you know, Neroon?" she asked, wishing to see what he would name tolerable.

"Seven."

Celina laughed. "You put me to shame."

He smiled with a, "Yes."

"But can you speak in longer sentences?"

"If I must."

"Let's have a test, shall we?"

"Why?"

"To put me to shame."

Neroon laughed. "Already have."

Celina smiled but didn't laugh. "Alright, Mr. Smarty-Pants, I was going to be nice. But since you aren't, neither am I. Your accent is deplorable."

"So is yours."

She was slightly taken aback. "You know what deplorable means?"

"I can guess."

"Well, my accent is bad because I only got to speak Minbari with a few Centauri over the years."

"I have had no one to speak with," he replied and seemed slightly proud that he had achieved a longer sentence and thought.

"So the Shai'Alyt doesn't know you've been studying English again?" she asked and Neroon looked askance for a moment before returning his eyes to her. Celina smiled. "Bad boy!"

'He never ordered me not to. I heeded his advice earlier because it appeared that it was true. However, we are no longer at war with your people. In fact, we are endeavoring on several united projects, to better instill peace,' he explained, leaning back from his crouched position before the console, surreptitiously stretching his back. Neroon used to wait until she wasn't looking before he did things like that (she knew because she'd hear the movement of cloth or catch a flicker out of the corner of her eye). Now, he seemed to think there was no harm in letting her see such things.

'Are you referring to the Babylon project?'

'That is one,' he replied, 'however more specifically, I was referring to us.'

'There is an us?' she asked, a brow raised in silent provocation. He simply returned the look with a sense of being above replying to such a suggestion. 'Fine, fine, fine. Go back to your computer console.' Celina was sure he'd bristle at her indirect order for him to do something. However, he didn't seem to realize that she had done so until he had already complied. She saw the moment the realization hit him. His eyes closed for a breath and then opened, looking back at her as if she had done something to him. 'Did you know I stood in the corridor on level two today for just over three hours?'

'I was told,' he replied vaguely. She couldn't quite tell what he was thinking from his tone and facial expression.

'By security?'

'By the Shai'Alyt.' Neroon considered for a moment, before continuing, 'He overheard the call to security. He found it quite . . . amusing.'

'You think it's amusing too,' Celina said.

'Only in its inanity,' he responded and she shrugged.

'Well, I suppose it's a good thing Healer Velnier tricked me out of the corridor when he did.' She thought for a moment before speaking. 'Though he did seem far too excited to explore my biology. Afterwards, I was half tempted to offer the good doctor a smoke.' Neroon seemed slightly puzzled at her last statement but she continued for good measure. 'Next time a Minbari healer mentions a 'thorough examination' I am running the other way with whatever virtue I have left.' He seemed rather amused by this and smiled genuinely. 'The Centauri healers were never that . . . inquisitive. And then Velnier kept on rambling on about how similar so many of the Human and Minbari systems are. And then he pointed out which ones were not. And then, he became fascinated with my blood pressure. Apparently, since he had only been allowed to examine a human cadaver, he hadn't been able to play with blood pressure. He had me doing jumping-jacks just to watch the change in my blood pressure and heart rate. I kid you not. Do you know how hard it is to do jumping-jacks while laughing? At one point, while I was in a much undignified position, he tried to call in another healer to discuss whatever it was he found so damn intriguing. I don't quite remember what I threatened Velnier with since all the blood in my body had rushed to my head but it must have been good because he decided that he would share his findings with the other healers later. Now, all of this was fine until he weighed me.' Celina gifted Neroon with a deeply serious look. 'Alyt, do you have any idea how much weight I have gained since I came aboard the Ingata?'

'I am not a scale,' he replied.

'Go on. Guess.'

'Fifteen pounds,' Neroon answered and Celina huffed in outrage.

'No! Eleven. Why? Does it look like fifteen?' She looked down at herself quickly as if to reassure herself that she had not grown to gigantic proportions.

'You had me guess,' he replied and she frowned at him.

'Well, it was a bad guess and even the stupidest human man would know that.'

Neroon frowned.

'No, I'm not going to apologize. You hurt my feelings first.' Celina tried to ignore his disgruntled look while she spoke. 'I knew this was going to happen as soon as I realized that I was not given access to any sort of gym. I tried doing some weird Pilates/Yoga hybrid routine that I remember from high school physical education but it doesn't seem to be working. So, I have decided that I am going to do something drastic.' She paused and waited several moments. Finally, Neroon spoke, as she knew he would.

'Drastic?'

Celina looked to Neroon pointedly and said, 'I am willing to beg.' The idea seemed to intrigue him. 'Neroon, can you please get me access to a gym?' He looked uncertain. 'Please?' He still looked uncertain. 'Pretty please with sugar on top?' Now, he just looked confused. 'Alright,' Celina said with a sigh, 'would it help if I were on my knees in front of you?'

'It would matter on what you were doing on your knees in front of me,' he replied and she wasn't sure if he had meant the sexual connotation. How could he not? Did Minbari even do that? By Neroon's facial expression, she could tell he was playing with her, but she wasn't sure in entirely what fashion.

'Begging, of course,' she said.

'I will consider it,' Neroon finally stated. 'However, it is unlikely as the only gym we have is used for combat training and has many weapons at hand.'

'Scared I'm going to hurt someone?' she asked with a laugh.

'No, I am concerned that _you_ could be hurt,' he responded softly, almost to himself, and Celina's laugh died.

'I don't know what to say to that,' she said honestly. Neroon gave her a stern look.

'It is not a statement of affection. It merely would not be politically advantageous to allow harm to come to you through our fault. At this time,' he explained.

'Alyt, has a woman ever told you what a sweet-talker you are?' Celina asked in a way to ease her own embarrassment at taking his earlier statement as more than it was.

'No,' he replied, returning his attention to the computer console. Neroon pressed a few buttons and the monitor flickered then faded. He stood and Celina stood along with him.

'Well, I am telling you now. You are a sweet-talker. In a twisted I-Am-Minbari-Warrior-Hear-Me-Roar type of way. Somewhat charming,' she told him while he walked to the bedroom with her unthinkingly following.

'Flattery will not improve your chances of receiving access to the gym,' he told her and she frowned. 'Now get in bed and try to be quiet.'

'I am all a-tingle with Minbari charm.'

'Lights. Off,' he said while climbing into the bed.

There was darkness. Silence. And Celina was sure that she was going to stub her toe in her search of the bed. She considered lying on the floor but quickly discarded the idea. It was best for her to not give Neroon the satisfaction. She made her way over to the bed and indeed did stub her toe. Celina hissed with pain. There was a small snort as if someone had stifled laughter.

"Bastard," she muttered while she climbed into bed. Celina half-hoped that she had broken her toe so that she could go to Velnier tomorrow and tell him what a horrible husband Neroon was. He would probably just laugh.

-----

Thank you for reading. I would dearly appreciate it if you'd take a moment to make my day and leave me a note telling me what you thought of my story. If you leave an email to contact you by, I would like to thank you for reading and answer any questions you may wish to pose.

Please continue on to the next chapter . . .


	6. Chapter 6

**Chapter Six:**

"_It's easy to come together for a common enemy. Now our job is to come together for a common goal." _  
- Sheridan: "No Surrender, No Retreat"

-----

The Alyt did not mention her request for some time as they both went about their strange daily routines day in and day out. A week later, Neroon pulled the blanket off of Celina's sleeping form and told her that he was taking her to the gym. Drowsily, she threw on the loosest clothing she had. As Neroon briskly directed her out the door, Celina caught a glimpse of the chronometer. She didn't believe it. Why would the Alyt believe that 0230 hours was an appropriate time for a work out? Still, she held her tongue, too surprised that he had gotten her access to a gym.

While they walked down a corridor on the eighth floor that she had until that point not been given access to, Celina heard the sound of voices, cracks, and bangs growing louder as they approached an open archway. Neroon paused at the entryway to the large room, watching her as she looked around her self dumbfounded.

There were no machines as she had come to expect from the civilian and military gyms she had visited Earth side. Consequently, it didn't seem much like a gym. It reminded her more of a sparring room. Several feet in front of her the hard floor gave way to a purple padded floor. There were no less than a half a dozen Minbari wrestling and sparring with strange weapons. No one took any notice of either Neroon or herself.

'We have forty-five minutes until I have to return to our quarters to prepare for the day,' Neroon told her, watching the others' activities with a critical eye.

'You're staying?'

'I am your partner,' he replied, narrowing his eyes as he saw a Minbari drop his weapon.

'Partner?' She knew she sounded rather dim, but it was two in the morning.

He looked to her and sighed. 'Every member of the crew is assigned a sparring partner. They are responsible for maintaining each other's physical fitness and improving their combat aptitude.'

'And I'm your partner?' Celina looked to him incredulously, 'I don't think I can maintain your physical fitness none the less improve your combat anything.'

'Agreed,' Neroon said. 'That is why the Shai'Alyt is my main sparring partner. However, we are wasting time. Tell me, do you have any combat training?'

'I took a couple karate lessons as a girl,' she replied. 'But I gave them up to take dance lessons. So, no.'

'Then we will start with something simple.' And he disappeared into a small side room. He returned a minute later with two wooden staffs. Cloth straps were wrapped around both ends of each. She supposed it was to soften the blow should an unfortunate beginner receive an end to the stomach or head. Neroon tossed one of the staffs to her and she caught it against her chest. He walked out into the middle of the padded floor, amidst the other Minbari. 'Take position,' he ordered, indicating a space three feet in front of him. Celina did as she was told, mimicking his posture. When he moved to take a step toward her, she suddenly realized that she was standing against an armed Minbari warrior. She cringed as he raised the staff up and brought it down on her, surprisingly slow in her perception. Without actually thinking, she raised her staff to block it. There was a soft clack. 'Keep your eyes open. Or else I will hurt you. And it will only be your own fault. Again.' He struck at her, faster, and she clumsily blocked it again. Each time Neroon hit a bit harder, slightly faster. With each blow she fought cringing but there were several times where she couldn't help herself. At first, he'd only repeat for her to keep her eyes open. When that didn't work, he took to banging her hands just enough to smart, causing her to drop her staff. It was frustrating to have to continually retake starting position. In her irritation at his continued assault and unrelenting demand for her to keep her eyes on the enemy, she tried to strike back. He blocked it with a twist of the wrist and sickening smile. Celina tried again and again. Neroon blocked each attempt with pathetic ease. He laughed as she panted from the exertion.

'Stop playing with me!' she demanded irritably before thinking and raised the staff again to jab it at his head. In a flash of movement, she saw the smile erased from his face as if it had never been there. The staff was no longer in her hands and she heard the clack belatedly. She snapped her head to the side to see where it went but the next thing she saw was purple mat as all the air burst out of her chest. Somehow he had flipped her on her stomach. Celina glanced over her shoulder, wincing at a pain in her back. She could make out a shadow and feel the weight holding her down. Neroon was sitting on the small of her back, his knees to either side of her. He was holding the staff against the back of her neck, the wood pressing against her cheek as she tried to see him. His hands were to either side of her neck applying an insistent but almost gentle pressure. Her head was at such an awkward angle that Celina was sure that had he applied pressure with intent, he could snap her neck. 'Alright, I'm dead. You win. Mercy.' Her voice was breathless but it still resounded loudly in her perception. In a corner of her mind, she recognized that the room was silent. A moment later the weight on her back and pressure on her neck were gone. She turned herself over slowly, grimacing at the tightness in her back from old injury, and squinted her eyes at Neroon. He was standing a step away from her feet, leaning on his staff. Moving to her knees, she looked up to him and saw him staring down the length of his nose at her. Celina raised herself to a knee, slowly catching her breath. She reached out a hand to him. He considered it for a long moment. It was really very quiet except for her breathing. She wondered if he could hear it as loudly as she could. Minbari weren't supposed to have as good hearing as Humans. Finally, he took a step forward, his lips pressed into a thin line, and grasped her forearm with his freehand, hauling her to her feet.

'What have you learned?' he asked and the sound of sparring continued in the room.

'That you are the prince of mortal combat and that I should be thankful that you have not broken my pretty little neck,' she said and he seemed somewhat pleased or amused. 'And,' Celina added, causing him to still with pause, 'that you weigh a lot more than one would think from looks alone.'

He smiled and quickly raised his staff, waiting for her to retake position. Celina sighed and walked the short distance to retrieve her staff. But when she bent to pick it up from the mat, she hissed in pain and stilled, not daring to move for a moment. Finally, Celina slowly straightened and turned to Neroon.

'It appears that will be all for today. Just a no can do.' She kept her eyes averted from Neroon, not wanting to see his hostility towards her inaptitude. Celina looked down at the staff with regret. 'In fact, I don't think I dare try to pick that up again. Not until I lay on my back with a hot pack for a few hours.' She heard him walk over to her, the mat crunching under his boots. He picked up her staff and she watched him hand the staffs over to one of the sparring Minbari, who was too obliged to return the weapons to the store room for the Alyt.

Neroon quickly moved to the exit but was diverted along the way by two Minbari sparring, one female and one male. As he approached them, both Minbari twisted their wrists similarly and the metal pikes in their hands collapsed into small cylinder tubes with a whooshing sound. They saluted him quickly before he ordered them to retake their starting stance. With another almost imperceptible twist of their wrists the cylinders extended out into metal pikes and they began prowling around each other with footwork that seemed surprisingly simple but Celina doubted she could do it without some serious practice. Like dancing. The male Minbari was the first to attack and their pikes clashed together with a metallic clang. Neroon's hand snapped out and grabbed the pikes where they held together. Both warriors maintained their stance while Neroon drew their attention to the fact that the male had locked his arms in the attack. The warrior sheepishly admonished himself and promised to strive to break the habit. After giving a satisfied nod, Neroon drew back, with a flick of the hand somehow gathered Celina to his side, and continued on his way out the archway. Though she didn't quite hear the words, Celina did catch what sounded like a whispered, 'I told you so,' from the one Minbari warrior to her companion. She couldn't help but smile at that. It seemed so like what a Human would do. Her heart ached at the strange familiarity and for a moment the longing to not be the sole Human being on the Ingata formed itself into a cemented thought. Celina would soon be reminded of the wisdom in being careful what she wished for.

-----

Over the length of the day, Celina noticed an increased tension amongst the crew that she witnessed practically buzzing from one corridor to another. Strangely enough, it seemed to have nothing to do with her. She had tried to ignore it as she went about her day. Finally, her curiosity got the better of her and Celina decided to go to the Mess Hall earlier than was her usual practice. Quite often, she would get lucky and overhear bits of information that she otherwise would not be privy to. The key was to sit there long enough, doing something innocuous like reading one of her few paperback books (today a romance novel with its telltale cover ripped off), until the room seemed to forget about her. She was just settling down into the sixteenth chapter where the busty heroine was about to discover that her amore had been seduced by the evil sorcerer with an enchanted sword when something told her to look up. Celina did and her mouth actually gapped in shock.

Gathered just about six feet in front of her at the entrance of the Mess Hall were five Humans. Two women, one about in her forties with cropped blonde hair and distinguished features, the other about Celina's age with copper ringlets and a tragic amount of freckles. With two, lithe men that she would place in their thirties with rough swarthy looks and almost black eyes. The last man was gray with piercing brown eyes and a bear-like stature. They all were looking at her in silent communion of disbelief.

"Are you Minbari collecting Humans now?" the bear of a man said, laughing belatedly to make it sound like a joke when in all reality, he had been rather serious. It was only when he said this that Celina noticed that Neroon was standing beside them with another Minbari behind them. She looked at the Alyt with mouth still slightly agape. He did not look pleased, shifting slightly as if uncomfortable in his own skin.

"This is Celina Amador," Neroon explained. She was too surprised by the appearance of the other Humans to have the presence of mind to wonder at the fact that he was speaking English in public.

"Hi," she said weakly, lowering the novel into her lap, losing her place but not caring.

"What's she doing here?" the blonde woman asked.

"She is in residence on the Ingata," he said, seemingly staring at a spot over her right shoulder.

"Does Earth know about this?" one of the swarthy men demanded with an obvious insinuation.

"They put me here," Celina answered and Neroon glared, not precisely at her but at the situation. She hoped.

"Why?" the woman asked again.

"Celina is my wife," Neroon said simply, apparently tired with the run around, staring down at the unfortunate Humans that were now gaping at him in disbelief. The woman with the freckles began to smile as if she thought she had caught on to a joke but as Neroon continued to stare at them unblinkingly, she sobered with the realization that he was quite serious.

"Whoa," one of the men said, but Celina wasn't sure which.

"But . . ." the young woman said, squinting her eyes as if in pain. "I don't get it. I mean . . . I don't get it." She looked to the gray man for answers. "Dad, how . . ." She looked to Celina. "You're his _wife_?"

"Define wife," the gray man said to Neroon. From the sour look on the Alyt's face, he'd much rather knock the man unconscious and go back to more important matters.

"Didn't ISN report our marriage a couple months ago?" Celina asked, nervously fingering the pages in her book. Several of them shook their heads. She was even more puzzled. "But they must've said something. Maybe they just mentioned it in passing to not bring much attention to it."

"Miss . . ." the gray man began, pausing while trying to recollect her name.

"Amador," she supplied.

"Miss Amador -or should I say Ms. Amador?-," he seemed to shake himself out of the thought, "how could they have actually reported a marriage between a Human and a Minbari and not garnered attention to it? If anyone knew about this, it'd be all over the news-feeds in a millisecond. People would be up in arms. I assure you they've said nothing."

"But they told me that they were going to make an announcement," Celina said almost to herself. "I mean this kind of defeats the purpose. There's still great risk without promise of so much of the gain. They told me that I wasn't going to be forgotten out here."

"Seems they lied," the blonde woman observed with a removed amusement.

"Or they're waiting to see how it plays out," she muttered. "Make sure they have the best sound clip. Damn."

"Eat quickly," Neroon brought attention back to his self, speaking to the gray man, whom Celina assumed was the leader of these visitors. "Then Senaan will escort you back to your _temporary_ quarters. Do not wander. If caught where you should not be, the response will be unpleasant."

"What about our ship?" the blonde woman asked.

"We demand to help with the repairs," one of the swarthy men said and Neroon's eyes widened at the audacity.

"If you don't mind," a second man added quickly.

"We know our ship better than any of you," the man continued. "We can get life support functional again before your people even figure out how to navigate the controls. Neither of us wants your people crawling all over our ship."

"Though we do appreciate your help. A lot." The second man seemed intent on softening his fellow's harsh words.

"Are you afraid of us discovering your cargo hold?" Neroon asked casually. Celina could tell he knew something. The girl with the freckles blanched. Her father laughed. The blonde woman narrowed her eyes suspiciously, obviously picking up from Neroon what Celina did. The demanding man stammered a moment.

"No," he said, "we just don't like Minbari tearing apart _our_ ship!"

"We have already discovered your cargo hold," Neroon told them with a small smile. "We are seizing it all in payment of our aid."

A smile remained on the gray man's face, but there was fury in his eyes. It seemed much more dangerous than the obvious outrage in the other man's face. The blonde woman snorted in derision but shrugged as if she expected such injustice from life.

"You'll come to regret that," the gray man said pleasantly.

"Is that a threat?" Neroon asked, staring him down. The man glanced away.

"No, a friendly warning," he insisted, eyes shiftily falling to Celina with consideration hidden in their depths. She didn't like the look and glanced to Neroon. The Alyt didn't seem to like it either. The man looked back to Neroon, catching a flash of something there and smiled. Apparently, that was the reaction he wanted. "Taking that cargo could be more hazardous to you than it's worth. I mean, they _are_ weapons. Alien weapons. You wouldn't want to accidentally shoot yourself in the foot. It would be _embarrassing_."

"If anything originating from _your_ ship poses a threat to anyone on _my _ship," Neroon paused, obviously including the Humans in front of him in his statement, "it will be spaced."

The freckled girl looked like she was going to be sick but her father kept smiling.

"Enjoy your meal," the Alyt intoned with his own smile. He spared a glance to Celina and said, 'Come,' before moving out the door, not glancing back to see her follow. Obviously, he didn't want her staying alone with the other Humans. She quickly followed, giving the others a sympathetic smile. Celina didn't think that she liked these people very much but they were Human so she did feel an allegiance to them. The freckled woman smiled sweetly back but Celina clearly heard her words and thought as she hurried from the room to Neroon's side.

"Talk about sleeping with the enemy!"

-----

'Why were you in the Mess Hall?' He turned and began to interrogate her before the door had fully closed behind her. Their quarters were dark. Neroon hadn't even taken the time to command the lights.

'Lights. On,' Celina ordered, taking the moment to dam the surprise at being asked questions when she seemed the one most at a loss.

'Why were you in the Mess Hall?' he demanded, even voiced, again.

'Why shouldn't I have been?' she asked in return, slightly testy at being caught off balance.

'It is not your habit.'

'I always go to the Mess Hall.'

'Not at this time.'

'Sorry, I didn't know that I was restricted even to the time of day in where I can and cannot go. How could I have been so stupid? Is there anything else I should be aware of?' Celina narrowed her eyes and put as much malice as possible into the gesture. She hoped Neroon realized how much she did not like him at that moment. He glared back. They continued this in silence for several seconds before the thought of how ridiculous they had to look struck and she had to fight the twitch at the corner of her mouth. She was mad, damn it!

'You did not plan this?' Neroon tentatively probed, his glare quickly losing its intensity.

'Plan _what_?' Celina asked, hands unconsciously twitching at her sides. She tended to get expressive with her gestures when frustrated or angry. Her mother called it theatrics, with hidden fondness and pride. Of course a performer would appreciate that. Her father had called it theatrics too, but it was more at her mother's expense. It would always start a fight, verbal gorilla warfare. Celina had learned to fight the gestures, better not to start it, even if she really wasn't the cause of it.

'The encounter in the Mess Hall,' he explained.

'What! Do I look omniscient to you, Alyt?' she asked, throwing her hands out in front of her. Just because she fought the gestures did not mean she always won the war. He had the good grace to look slightly discomfited. 'No, I had no idea that there were Humans on board none the less that you were bringing them into the Mess Hall. But what's the problem? Were you trying to . . . You were planning to keep us away from each other, weren't you? You weren't going to tell them about me or me about them, were you?'

He seemed to adapt a cold veneer and pull into himself at her allegations. 'I thought it best.'

'Are you in on it too? Making sure people don't find out about this?' She made a broad gesture between them.

'You are angry that you were not told the truth to by your government,' he stated, not even bothering to ask.

'They _lied_,' Celina said weakly, her hands coming up to wipe at her face. She wasn't crying but her face felt so tired, numb, almost itchy. 'But that I kind of expect. That's what people in charge do. Hide what they can't put a good face on. No, what I'm really fuming about is that I had no idea. I mean, I've gotten a couple letters from home. From family and friends. They didn't lie to me but they never mentioned this. They said that they had been ordered not to talk to the press but they didn't say that the press didn't _know_. I just assumed. And I know that they knew I would. They were deceiving me with omission. That's just as bad. How do I know that this is the only thing they are hiding from me?'

'As to what you said,' Neroon steered her away from the thought, 'I was not part of that deception. I had no idea and spared no thought as to whether our marriage had become common knowledge on Earth or not before speaking with Mr. Yager. It has not on Minbar. We do not have what you consider press.'

'Then why were you planning on keeping us apart?'

'Senaan had made reference to perhaps introducing my wife to Mr. Yager and his crew. That you would all perhaps prefer the company of those less alien. She said this in English. I do not know why. It was a mistake. Mr. Yager's daughter overheard and from her words I deduced that they were unaware of our marriage. I thought it not my place to go against what must have been the wishes of our governments,' Neroon explained.

'That's the whole reason?' Celina asked tiredly, realizing she felt stupid standing practically in the doorway. She walked over to sit on the couch. Neroon hesitated. Probably trying to formulate a response that would say what he wanted without lying. More deception by omission. 'Are you jealous?' He looked to her sharply.

'Why would I be _jealous_?' he asked with disgust.

'Well, it's got to rub the wrong way that your own wife may prefer the company of unknown Humans to yours.'

'I simply do not like Mr. Yager. He strives to appear pleasant to hide the fact that he is anything but.'

She smiled impishly. 'Which would surely make it worse if I liked him.' He frowned. 'By the way, I don't.'

'That's best. He is a more dangerous man than he wishes others to realize,' Neroon said.

'Then why are you repairing his ship?'

A corner of his mouth twitched. He was either hiding a snarl or a smile. It was difficult to tell at times. 'So that we may be rid of him.'

'You could have simply blown him out of the sky. Then you would have been rid of him,' Celina suggested. Now, Neroon did smile.

'I would have preferred that.'

'Somehow I am not surprised,' she said. 'Then why didn't you? Do Minbari have sudden revelations of conscience?'

'We are bound by the promises of the Gray Council,' he replied, disgruntled.

"Ohh," Celina mouthed to herself. She looked back at Neroon. 'What did they do this time?'

'They declared for all Minbari vessels to offer available aid to distressed Earth vessels. We are in neutral space on the border of Minbari territory. We received a distress signal from a merchant ship. Earth signature. They were losing life support. We were bound to respond,' Neroon answered. For a moment, Celina thought about the hell that that crew had to have felt at being unable to salvage their life support systems. Then she thought at what they must have felt at the face of their rescue.

"Oh, god," she muttered to herself. 'When they saw the Ingata, they must have thought they were going to die.'

'They did attempt to refuse our aid until the last possible moment,' he admitted.

'You didn't leave as soon as they refused?' she asked, confused.

Neroon paused for a moment. 'Our readings hinted at the signatures of military grade weaponry. The ship itself was seemingly barely equipped to defend it. Those two facts appeared to be in opposition.'

'Their cargo hold,' Celina said, coming to the conclusion they must have.

'It deserved further investigation.'

'You were curious.'

'Yes.'

She thought for a moment before asking, 'Are you really taking their cargo?'

'You know I do not lie,' he responded.

'Yes, but that doesn't mean you don't exaggerate,' she replied, leaning back and tucking her legs underneath herself. Neroon watched the gesture.

'Life Support equipment is difficult and expensive to repair. We are bound to offer aid. We are not bound to do so for free.'

'Have you seen the weapons?' Celina asked, resting her chin on her hand.

'Yes,' he said warily, obviously seeing where her questions may be going.

'Can you tell me if they were bound for Earth?'

'No,' Neroon answered immediately, not unkindly but resolute.

'Is that because you don't know or because you can't tell _me_?'

He paused for a moment and looked to her askance. 'Yes.' Neroon's mouth curved into a smile and she couldn't help but smile just a little, as well, even though his answer vexed her. 'I must return to duties now. I have a life support system to get online.'

'The sooner they are gone, the better, yes?' she joked and he seemed to pick up the thought from her.

'The sooner he is gone, the less chances there are for me to kill him,' he answered. He smiled cynically. 'I would not wish to cause a _diplomatic_ incident.'

'Actually, I don't think you would,' Celina replied and whatever he truly thought of what she said, he hid under a mask of amusement. 'So do I get to meet with them again? Now that they know about me and all.'

'I thought you said that you didn't like Mr. Yager,' Neroon said coolly.

'And I don't,' she responded. 'But there are four other Humans. Including a woman around my own age. It'd be nice to have something like girl talk. And I promise I won't tell them that we aren't having sex.'

His expression was absolutely unmoving, a faint look of haughtiness. 'Why would I care?'

'You are seriously telling me that you wouldn't care about Humans laughing over the fact that the Alyt isn't having sex with his own wife?' Celina asked, not believing that for a moment. Neroon had far too much of an ego.

'True, that is not . . .' he seemed to search for the right word. 'Optimal,' he settled for. She wasn't sure whether he was referring to the fact or Humans laughing about it. Celina almost asked but decided to leave it alone.

'Plus, I'd like to get more information about what's been going on in Earth space. Maybe find out what ISN actually _is_ reporting. I'm curious about how the Babylon project is turning out. It's supposed to be opening within the year,' she rambled on a little, excited with the prospect of meeting with one or more of the other Humans. From Neroon's hard look, Celina knew he could tell. He wasn't comfortable with her obvious, almost blinding, desire to interact with her own kind. But with a shift and fall of his eyes, she knew he wasn't unsympathetic. Yes, his ego didn't like the fact that she may prefer the company of these strangers to him, but it must have been painful to feel her somehow suffer. Suffering having as much to do with what he was as what he wasn't. It was getting better each day though, she realized and knew that she should remember to tell him such.

He walked over and sat to her side, pulling the remote console to him. Neroon pulled up a window for internal communication and entered a code. 'This is the code for the quarters Mr. Yager and his daughter are staying in. Save the code in case you become disconnected or need to contact them again,' he didn't look at her while he spoke.

'You are giving _his_ code?' she asked incredulously.

Neroon looked back to her. 'You said you specifically wanted to meet with his daughter.'

'Yes,' she replied. 'I did.'

'Meet with them in the Mess Hall,' he ordered as much as said. 'I do not want them in our quarters.' Neroon rose to his feet, not looking at her. She could tell he was quickly going to run back to whatever duties were waiting for him. Celina reached out without thinking and slipped her hand into his own. He looked down sharply, reflexively closing his hand when she pressed into his palm. She held his eyes for a moment before speaking.

'Thank you, Neroon,' Celina told him, squeezing his hand to make sure he knew she meant it. The Alyt extricated his hand with precision and left the room without glimpsing in her direction. He looked utterly confused.

-----

Thank you for reading. I would dearly appreciate it if you'd take a moment to make my day and leave me a note telling me what you thought of my story. If you leave an email to contact you by, I would like to thank you for reading and answer any questions you may wish to pose.

Please continue on to the next chapter . . .


	7. Chapter 7

**Chapter Seven:**

_"You know, the one thing in life that you can be sure about is that you are going to make mistakes." _  
- Garibaldi to Zack: "Epiphanies"

-----

They agreed to meet the next morning over breakfast. The other Humans hadn't been on the same time as the Ingata so they met in the Mess Hall quite a bit later than was Celina's habit. She didn't mind so much since she had had a difficult time finding rest the night before and welcomed the chance to sleep in. Celina hadn't spoken to Neroon at all since the day before. He had seemed downright cranky when he had returned that night. She didn't know what it was about, but Celina was sure it wasn't because of her. That did little to comfort her. At least if it was because of her, she had a chance of fixing it. This was out of her hands. So, she was unable to sleep, but she chalked that up to the excitement of spending the day with Mr. Yager's daughter, Rose. It turned out that that excitement was misplaced. When they finally sat at the table together, the girl might as well have been mute, though Celina could see a thousand questions running through the other's mind. It was in her eyes. They were calculating. Like her father's. But they didn't hold the same malice and that put Celina more at ease.

"Why don't you just ask?" she suggested. "This is at least as uncomfortable as whatever you could ask me."

"I don't think I know what I want to ask," Rose replied, chewing on a finger. "Is it horrible? I mean, how can you stand it? Can you?"

"It's hard being away from Earth," Celina admitted, folding her arms on the tabletop. "But I built ways to deal with it a long time ago. The Ingata isn't a torture chamber exactly. It's more boring than anything else."

"That's not what I meant," Rose said with exasperation.

"What did you mean?"

"I meant with _him_," she clarified. "Is it terrible to be with him?"

"Who?"

The girl nearly rolled her eyes but seemed to stop herself as if to spare Celina's feelings. "The Minbari."

"Alyt Neroon?"

"Yes, him."

"No," Celina responded, wondering exactly what she thought about her relationship with Neroon. "It's . . . It's interesting."

"Interesting," Rose said to herself, weighing the word. She looked up to Celina. "Is he a bad man?"

"Matters on what you consider bad," she answered, examining the pinkness of her nails against her tan skin. "I don't consider him bad. Not really. At least I don't think so. He's wrong about some things to the point of being downright stupid about a couple. However, not more so than anyone else is. He's no saint but he's no . . ."

"Hitler?" Rose suggested then snorted, raising a hand belatedly as if she could hide the gesture. "Sorry," she said in excuse, "but do you even see the similarity?"

"Huh?" Celina replied intelligently.

"Hitler. Genocide," Rose responded. "Minbari. Alyt Neroon. Genocide. Figure it out."

"It's not the same. Hitler was a monster. Neroon's not a monster," Celina insisted. "Plus, you lose the argument by default. Godwin's Law. Make a comparison to the Nazis you automatically lose."

"Whatever. But I'm not the first person to make the connection," the girl pointed out and Celina scrunched her nose in dislike of where the conversation had turned.

"The Minbari chose to stop," Celina reminded, staring hard into the girl.

"Do you know why?" Rose asked in a whisper, curiosity making her eyes bright. Or perhaps that was hope.

"No." That brightness faded.

"So you don't mind being this Minbari's wife because he's sorry that he killed us?"

Celina narrowed her eyes, acting like she was focusing on her nails again but really it was in thought. This was uncomfortable to think about. She had tried to think about it for months. Ever since she accepted the bizarre offer, really. But Celina never felt right about it, never even good. So she had decided to try to leave it alone. "He's not sorry about the people he killed."

"Alright," Rose allowed, "then it's okay because he realized what he was doing was wrong and stopped?"

"It's not like that," Celina replied and was about to explain how Neroon had told her that he hadn't agreed with the Gray Council, how he thought they should have been dead. But something stopped her. It was a few moments before she realized it was because it wasn't her secret to tell. Just like how she wouldn't want him telling hers. She was ashamed of her secret. Perhaps he was ashamed of his. "It's okay because I make it so."

"What do you mean?"

"A lot of what I do," Celina explained and then paused. "I act like this means more to me, is more important to others, more held together than it actually is so that it might one day actually be."

"We do that more than we'd like to admit, don't we?" Rose asked with surprising insight. Celina only nodded, taking a sip of some imitation juice. It was overly sweet on the tongue. But the aftertaste was tart. It took her weeks to get used to it, none the less like it. Rose drank plain water. There was no difference between Minbari water and Human water. So, it must have been easier for the girl to imagine she was drinking the Earth variety. "Do you like him?"

Celina forced herself to take another, longer sip from her juice. She shrugged, letting Rose take her own answer from that. The woman seemed to get the hint, but wasn't going to give Celina another chance to answer a question with a yes or no, whether verbal or nonverbal.

"So, what's he like in bed?" Rose smirked when Celina almost snorted her juice. It wasn't that she hadn't expected the question. She had, to a degree. However, there was a difference between expecting and not reacting. Celina looked about herself at the other Minbari in the Mess Hall. There were quite a few but none seemed to be paying much attention to them. There were stolen glances but little more. And there was no one that she recognized for knowing English and no looks that suggested that she overlooked someone. She looked back to the girl, wondering how exactly she could answer such a direct question. Celina did not like to lie. It made her uncomfortable, because she had been taught young not to lie. Consequently, she was a bad liar. But she was good at dancing around telling the absolute truth. Deception by omission. That was her family's brand of lies. "You do know, don't you?" Rose prodded.

"Oh, yeah," Celina replied, realizing how much fun this could be. Of course, she'd have to make sure she didn't overdo it.

"Is it bad?"

"No, at first it was . . ." she searched for the right word, "awkward. But once I got used to the angle, it got much better. Even fun."

Rose's eyes widened. "Angle?" she almost squeaked.

"Yeah," Celina continued. "But since Neroon showed me a few Minbari tricks, I don't end up on the floor anymore. Actually, I think the Alyt is at his best in bed."

Oh, Neroon owed her for this. Though, she was continuing this conversation more out of the sheer fun of it than anything else. The way Rose was beginning to blush and stare was entertaining. Still, she was painting a pretty nice picture of him.

"Yeah, he's a magnificent warrior. I called him the Prince of Mortal Combat once and he definitely deserves that title. And in bed he . . ." Celina paused and smiled, "he always makes sure I have what I need. I've never even had to ask for anything. I just have to make sure I don't talk. He doesn't like it when I talk there. The bed is a no-talking zone."

Rose's mouth was now slightly parted, as if she wanted to say something, but wasn't sure what she wanted to say. "Umm," she finally settled on.

"Mmm," Celina hummed while she took a sip of her juice before sucking on her bottom lip a moment to catch an errant drop. She smiled. "Tart."

Rose raised her eyebrows and swallowed reflexively, looking away. "Just wrong," she muttered to herself. Celina sobered as a chill ran down her spine.

"What exactly?" she asked, swishing the dregs of the juice around the bottom of the glass. There was just enough left for one strategic swallow. She'd have to be careful with it.

"From what I gather, you had somewhat _noble_ reasons for doing this and that's your prerogative. But don't you think it's wrong that you seem to enjoy it so much?" From Rose's scrunched nose and narrowed eyes, she could tell the girl was truly teetering on the edge of disgust.

Celina took her last strategic swallow and focused on the sweet before the tart.

-----

Their conversation continued on a more innocuously pleasant tone, generally covering the news, both the reported and only speculated. Celina found out little more about Rose than that she and her father didn't normally travel with their cargo. This cargo was special. Once Celina brushed the subject, the woman shied away immediately. When Celina mentioned the fact that their cargo was seized Rose responded with a whispery, "Dad is _so_ mad." They caught eyes and Rose's were riddled with worry. "He does weird things when he's mad. They really shouldn't have touched the weapons." Celina only wondered on what the girl had meant by the choice of the word 'weird.' But she forgot it swiftly as the woman changed the subject. They became enthralled in a discussion of the latest remake of Romeo and Juliet with the actor Jack Halliwell when they were about to part outside the Mess Hall. Wishing to continue the discussion, Celina offered to walk Rose back to her quarters on the fourth floor. Rose distractedly agreed, quickly returning to her reasoning as to why the director and actor must have been telling the truth when they said that the sex scene was actually the actors and not a digital portrayal.

"It's so funny it has to be the real thing," she insisted. "Well," Rose shrugged, "Not _real_. But you know what I mean."

Celina listened more than spoke, happy to hear another jabbering on about nothing of deep consequence. She nodded and encouraged the girl when asked questions but otherwise, Rose seemed to be on a roll. Rose obviously had a thing for the actor. Celina hadn't really taken to Jack Halliwell. He had a sharp face with womanly eyes and hardly more than pubescent body. But his voice was heaven. Shakespeare wrote for such a voice. Rose promised to burn her a copy of the movie, illegally obtained prior to its release (her father had "connections"), if she could before they left. Celina was sure that there wouldn't be time for her to get to the recording, burn it, and hand it over to Celina before Neroon forced the ship to leave. That ship would be on its way as soon as life support came online and they had been working on it nonstop almost since the moment they arrived.

The lift doors opened and Rose took a breath to continue in her prattling when a familiar, metallic whoosh sent cold fingers crawling up her spine. Belatedly, Celina realized where she recognized the sound from. Sparring Room. The pikes. Celina pushed Rose out of her way and ran towards the sound, somehow knowing that the Minbari did not take out their pikes against fellow Minbari outside the Sparring Room. Rounding the corner into a corridor that an analytical part of her mind warned her was not one she was permitted in, she only paused a moment to catch her footing and stare in shock and horror at the sight.

She arrived to see Mr. Yager slumped, almost sitting, on the ground, cradling an arm; his face gray. Neroon held the weapon and was pulling back for another strike. There were other people around, both Minbari and Human, but they seemed frozen in place, singularly unwilling to intercede. They were the smart ones. Celina was very stupid or at least naïve in this case. All the time she had spent with Neroon had placed a pretty veil over her eyes. Neroon would pose and growl, but not actually hurt her. He'd never hurt her. So, the logical thing to do was to place herself in front of Mr. Yager and Neroon would pause, not willing to hurt her, and come to his senses. It didn't quite work out like that.

Celina did throw herself over Mr. Yager but Neroon did not pull his strike. The first one she could chalk up to him not realizing in time she was there. He was more than halfway through the hit when Celina naively threw herself into the mix. However, he knew full well what he was doing in the second strike. It wasn't as hard as he could have made it and not as harmful a position either, but it still burned like Hell. He paused after that, an otherwise dead quiet filled with labored breathing, from her and Mr. Yager and perhaps Neroon too. She heard him pull back again, the rustle of fabric a familiar prelude to the attack. Celina glanced up and saw the Alyt take a step forward. He was going to attack again. She cringed in expectation and pulled into herself around Mr. Yager's back, though hardly covering him. There was a long pause.

The pike whooshed shut.

'Page Medical,' Neroon ordered simply and then walked away. Mr. Yager was shaking beneath her. She rubbed his back, thinking the man terrified.

He was laughing.

-----

Celina felt embarrassed and it wasn't for the fact that she was sitting nude from the waist up with Velnier rubbing some type of cream into her shoulder. She had no idea why she should feel embarrassment. According to all her moral reasoning, she had done the right thing. Even Neroon had expressed a reticence to actually kill Mr. Yager. So, she had helped the Alyt when his control had snapped.

That's what had happened, Celina realized. The first day she had met with Neroon, she had known that he was itching for a fight, to take his aggravation out on another living being. She had understood then that he would never do so with another Minbari and had foolishly thought that he would take it out on her. And perhaps he would have. But once Mr. Yager and his crew had arrived, she should've considered that Neroon might have jumped at the first opportunity. It had taken him a day. Mr. Yager had picked at his control, quickly chipping away at the façade, and forced the Alyt to do something stupid. There was no doubt in Celina's mind that the man had wanted the Alyt to attack him. She wasn't quite sure what Yager had expected to get out of it, since he was rather lucky to not have been practically bludgeoned to death. There was no way he could have known that Celina would have been there to save his back, most literally. How much was scheming and how much was luck?

'I really wish I wasn't me right now,' she muttered to herself. Velnier picked up the circular container to scoop more ointment onto two fingers. He placed it down on the table beside her heavier than was strictly necessary; obviously, she'd be getting little sympathy from him. 'Are you mad at me?' she asked needlessly. He pulled on her unharmed shoulder to twist her around so that he could reach her right side.

'Lift your arm,' he instructed and Celina sighed, pulling her right arm over her head and holding it there with her left hand. She cringed at the stretching of bruised skin. Some kind of dermal something or other had already been run over her deep bruises. When she had arrived at the infirmary, she'd been having trouble breathing, her side tight with pain. Now, the pain was tolerable and this ointment was quickly numbing it away. Velnier began to rub his fingers on the ugly discoloration running below her armpit and slightly across her ribcage. He reached out and lifted her breast with his freehand, to rub the ointment roughly into the bruising below. Every movement was calculated and precise. No patting on the shoulder in understanding or comely words of comfort.

'Alright, so you're mad at me,' she reiterated, feeling unjustly slighted and somewhat uncomfortable with his manhandling.

'I am not _mad_,' he replied, pulling slightly on her raised arm to signal for her to return it to its normal position.

'Then what are you?'

'I am finishing with you so that I may attend to your fellow's injuries.'

'He's not my fellow,' Celina said irritably.

'Then what is he?' Velnier replied in a voice blank in its accusation.

She sighed and rubbed at her face. 'I don't know,' she huffed into her hands. 'He's nobody.'

'Then you risked so much for somebody who is really nobody,' the healer said in a manner that made her statement sound extremely stupid to her own ears. 'I see.'

'You can't possibly be telling me that you think Neroon was doing the right thing?' she asked, throwing her hands back down to push on the tabletop, lifting her off and to her feet. Velnier picked up the canister of cream and screwed the lid back into place.

'I do not know why he was doing such a thing. It is neither my place to judge nor ask. I am a healer, not the Shai'Alyt,' he responded with measured words. 'Neither are you.'

'I know,' she snapped back.

'I thought you may have forgotten.'

Celina shook her head and grabbed her bra. She was going to put it on but reconsidered it because of her bruised side. Stuffing the garment into her large pants pocket, she looked over her shoulder at Velnier. 'Why did you see to my bruises before Mr. Yager's broken arm? Shouldn't you see to the more serious injuries first?'

'You are more important to us,' he replied, moving to the door. She heard it open with her back turned and she pulled her shirt over her head, hoping her nipples were not offensively evident through the dark cotton. Celina shrugged, hardly caring. The door slid open again and she turned. Velnier was leaning in the doorway, a hand holding it open. 'The guard outside this room will escort you to the Shai'Alyt.' Then he let go and the door closed.

Celina cringed and wished, with halfhearted truth, that Neroon had simply killed her.

-----

The Shai'Alyt's quarters were right beside her own. This seemed slightly strange to her as she had always imagined he hid away in some crevice in the bowels of the Ingata. More for the fact that she never saw him than that being the sort of place she thought he should reside in. It seemed that sheer probability would have had her catching a glimpse of him at least once since the day of her arrival. Surely the fact that she didn't hinted at avoidance. Which made it all the worse that he specifically wanted to see her, now.

It felt like she was being sent to the principal's office for putting chewing gum in the teacher's hair. But much, much worse. At least, the principal had had a sense of humor about that. She doubted Branmer was going to have any sense of humor about this. Celina really had no idea what to expect from the Shai'Alyt. He'd never even spoken to her directly before.

The guard who had been escorting her reached out and pressed the control panel beside the door. He moved to stand behind her. The door opened. Celina stood, hands clasped in front of her, feet together, slightly sweaty, and completely unwilling to move. Several seconds passed. Finally, the guard reached out and gave her a slight push on her lower back, just enough to set her in forward momentum. She both silently thanked and hated him.

The door closed behind her. She'd never realized how loud the doors on this ship were. The room was lit with a peaceful ambiance, light and dark warring in the corners but otherwise yielding were the other dominated. It was larger than their quarters, containing a small kitchenette, however in every other way almost identical.

"Celina Amador," his voice rolled over each syllable as if tasting it . . . and finding it odd if not unsavory. Her eyes searched the room and fell on him, swathed in the black warrior's uniform, tucked into one of these warring corners, beside what appeared to be a small altar. Some triangular artifact hung on the wall with crème candles lit at its base. Branmer placed a smoking stick of incense into a simple holder. He glanced at the candles before returning his eyes to her. "I can tell that you realize you should be ashamed. But do you understand yet why?" She swallowed, trying to think of how to respond. "No, then," he responded for her, simply and unsurprised. "You publicly betrayed your husband."

She blinked in surprise. "Sir, if I may speak plainly, I did not!"

He held her eyes for several moments and finally it was she who looked away. She hated herself for it. Branmer glanced back to the candles before turning his back to the altar and walking to the middle of the room. Celina still stood just before the doorway.

"You were presented with a choice, that between Mr. Yager, a Human stranger, and Alyt Neroon, your Minbari husband. You chose Mr. Yager, betraying trust between husband and wife. Yet, in the same move expected that trust to shield you, expected him to abide by it while you did not. You are a hypocrite."

When spoken like that, it did seem painfully clear why the other Minbari had been hardly able to even look at her. It was obviously a clash of cultures to some extent. Yes, there had been a choice, but it had been life and death, not stranger or husband. But she couldn't deny that on some level it might have been a choice of Human over Minbari. Celina cringed at the thought. Her allegiance to her people was not wrong in her mind, but wasn't particularly pretty at times.

"I know how many Humans he has killed," she replied, not liking the sound of her own voice. "And I somewhat came to terms with that. Because it was war and he is a soldier. But there is a difference between _knowing_ he has killed and standing by and _watching_ him do it. I couldn't do nothing. That would have been too great a sin." Celina sighed before pleading, "Can't anyone appreciate that?"

Branmer was still for several moments, his eyes downcast as if in thought. Finally, he barely inclined his head and walked into the kitchenette. "Neroon understands that," he said, opening a cabinet and standing back to search the shelves with his eyes. "To some extent. He has lived too closely with you to not know some of your mind. However, he cannot completely forget your betrayal because it was not your intention. As action was required due to your allegiance to your Humanity, action is required due to your allegiance to your husband." Finally, he seemed to find what he was looking for and retrieved a small metal tin from the top shelf.

"What kind of action?" she asked hesitantly.

"Mr. Yager plans to report Neroon's assault," Branmer replied, holding the canister while looking at Celina. "He more than hints that he knows the right people to make a –how did he term it? Oh yes- "media circus." The Gray Council has been making great strides to appease your government and its people. They have sacrificed Neroon before. Why wouldn't they now?"

"You think Mr. Yager is telling the truth, about knowing people in high places?" Celina questioned.

"Yes," he said. Branmer walked over to the counter separating the kitchenette from the doorway and set the canister down. "However, I will not allow further harm to befall Neroon."

Celina quelled the small pang caused by the understanding that she was considered 'harm.'

"So what do you plan to do?"

"I am giving you the opportunity to help your husband. Go to Mr. Yager, convince him to forget Neroon's actions, to not cause further discord. He should listen to you. You saved his life; this is a small favor to ask from him in return. Honor should make this an easy decision on his part."

"Honor . . ." she said to herself before looking up to Branmer. "You can't always depend on honor. Especially from men like Yager. What'll you do if I can't convince him?"

"Life Support systems are very delicate machinery," Branmer replied, opening the canister. "A mix in the proper placement of tubing can direct carbon monoxide where it should divert it. We are not familiar with all the configurations. There can be confusion in translated directions. Mistakes do happen."

Celina felt her eyes widen at the implication. It was amazing how Branmer could speak of honor in one breath and carbon monoxide poisoning in the next. The last possible communiqué Mr. Yager's crew had gotten out would have said they were having problems with their life support. No one need even know that the Minbari were involved.

"Oh, what a stupid, stupid man," Celina whispered to no one in particular. "I'll talk to him. I'm sure I can convince him to do the _honorable_ thing."

"They should finish the adjustments to the Life Support systems tomorrow afternoon," Branmer informed her. "We'll meet for tea before that time. You will tell me of your people's sense of honor, I will tell you of mine, and we will discuss Mr. Yager's."

Celina nodded, unconsciously grabbing her hands behind her back, taking the stance of a soldier. _Father would be so proud_, she thought bitterly as she realized it.

"Dismissed," Branmer said, voice level, spooning some grainy substance from the canister into a waiting cup. Celina nodded again and turned to the door.

"You know I'm not just doing it for Neroon," she said over her shoulder.

"However, that is what we will tell him," Branmer replied.

"He's smarter than that," Celina stated, pressing the door release.

"Everyone wants to believe that those they surround themselves with care enough for them to stand against opposition in their defense. Even Neroon. He wants to believe his wife could care for him." Branmer sighed. "But try to keep it from being a lie."

The door closed behind her and she found herself numb to everything but the bruises.

-----

Celina returned to their quarters. Neroon wasn't there, but he had been. The coffee table was overturned, the remote console sitting a short distance away on its side. Everything else was just as it had been left that morning. She righted the coffee table and set the console back upon it. The computer was still on. Celina was about to turn it off when she realized something. It wasn't logged in under her authorization code. It was logged in under one she didn't recognize immediately. It had to be Neroon's. She literally had nearly unlimited access at her fingers. Obviously, Neroon didn't realize he hadn't logged out. He had been too upset. She sat down heavily on the couch, resting her chin in her hands, and stared into the screen.

This would have been an absolutely terrible moment for Neroon to walk in. But he would be off in the name of duty for several hours. She couldn't even imagine the information she could dig out before then.

Celina sighed and slammed the console shut, effectively logging Neroon out. She'd betrayed her husband once already that day and didn't have it in herself to do it to him again. Not today.

She sat in silence for an uncomfortable amount of time. Afraid that he would return, she was on edge, biting on a knuckle and focusing on the blankness of space. Then another, colder fear gripped her . . . what if he didn't return? Celina hoped to God that Neroon would not stay away because of this. She had an overwhelming desire to make a public demonstration of choosing the Alyt over Mr. Yager. Nothing drastic or overly dramatic. That would make it cheap. However something, some gesture that he would recognize as an effort on her part.

Decision made, Celina contacted Mr. Yager and asked for him to meet her in the Mess Hall in ten minutes. He smiled as if he had expected it, causing her to reconsider who was manipulating whom. But perhaps she was reading too much into his smiles.

-----

Thank you for reading. I would dearly appreciate it if you'd take a moment to make my day and leave me a note telling me what you thought of my story. If you leave an email to contact you by, I would like to thank you for reading and answer any questions you may wish to pose.

Please continue on to the next chapter


	8. Chapter 8

**Chapter Eight:**

_"You should never hand someone a gun unless you are sure where they will point, and no mistake." _  
- Sinclair to Orin Zinto: "By Any Means Necessary"

-----

Mr. Yager was smiling at her again. It made her nervous. She took a sip of her water, for something to do. He raised his eyebrows into his bangs. Celina looked around them. It was evening. Well, as much as any time could be named evening, out in the blackness of space. This was one of the busiest times of the day, just enough after duty shift. The room was a little more than half full. It wasn't very loud, but wasn't very quiet either. She found it would be easy to fall into the ebb and flow of conversation around her.

"How's your arm?" she asked to break the building expectation between them and nodded towards the arm set on the table top. He seemed perfectly at ease, as if this was a conversation between friends, crowding the table and the space between them. Celina was seated away from the table, her legs and arms crossed, cup in hand. She tried to conduct her body language so that those around them would know she was not enjoying herself, but not so directly that Mr. Yager could call her rude.

"Oh!" he said, looking down at his arm as if he'd forgotten it. Yager flexed and turned it, splaying his fingers then fisting them. "It's good. A bit stiff. But I'm not a young man; I'm used to stiff bones."

Celina nodded, not really paying attention to what he said.

"You're lucky Neroon didn't break your neck," she said, using his name because it was more distinguishable amongst her speech than his title. She wanted those listening to know whom she was talking about. "He could have, you know, if he had wanted to. You'd be dead right now if Neroon wanted you to be."

"I think I owe my survival more to you than to Neroon," he replied. "Thank you for that, by the way. I know it must have been difficult for you to go against your husband like that. But I appreciate that."

"I _didn't_ go against my husband," Celina insisted. "I was only giving him a reason to pause and reconsider. If he had asked me to move, I would've." She wasn't quite certain whether that was a lie or not, having never considered it. "Anyways, what did you do to make Neroon so upset?"

"Who said I did anything?" he asked.

"Neroon's not an animal."

Yager gestured with a hand across the table. "Ah, but even an animal has reasons for attacking. Fear, hunger, anger, illness . . ."

"You're making my point for me."

"Not exactly," he protested. "I was talking about animals. You were talking about Minbari. Who's to say what's what with Minbari? One moment they want to wipe you from existence. The next, they want to be the best of friends. So, I really have no idea what exactly set the Alyt off. I can't imagine the type of life you are living, with so much uncertainty. Tell me, do you get lonely out here in space with only a cold Minbari for comfort?"

Celina was slightly taken aback by his change in subject. The way he had said that sounded as if he actually cared, but she doubted it. She narrowed her eyes, as if with her vision squinted and blurred she could cut away his façade to see his true face. It didn't work.

"You're right," she finally said, looking away, "We can't say what's going on in a Minbari mind. But, obviously, something did set Neroon off. I can't ask him what because he's probably still mad at me."

"I hope I didn't put a stressor on your relationship," he said with a pleasant face that somehow hinted at humor underneath the surface.

"We'll mend whatever harm done," Celina replied, pausing to sip from her glass. "Our relationship will be just as strong as before."

"How strong is that, if I may ask?"

"No, you may not."

He shrugged. "Curiosity killed the cat. You know," Yager leaned forward, placing his chin on a raised fist. "Maybe that's what set Neroon off. I asked too many questions. He's very protective of his things. His people. His ship. His Shai'Alyt. His wife. His. His. His."

Celina placed the glass back on the table. Yager was looking off, watching the Minbari around them; not actually looking at her. He reached out with the arm Neroon had broken earlier that day and ran a finger up the top of her hand. She quickly drew it away.

"I don't think he'd like anyone touching his things," he continued on, leaving his arm stretched out between them, but looking off to the side as if he wasn't aware he had touched her. Celina was very uncomfortable. She pushed her chair back from the table another inch, seeking some safety in the measure of distance.

"I think it'd be best if we all just acted like this morning never happened," Celina said, bringing the discussion back on subject. He looked at her then. "It's more trouble than it's worth."

"Like the weapons?" Yager asked, curiously.

"Couldn't we call it even?" she asked in return, tired with the run around.

"How is it even?" The man cocked his head to the side and smiled. He had dimples. Idly, she reasoned that he must have been awfully handsome as a young man. He still acted like he was. But now his features had filled out and grayed making him more distinguished than actually handsome.

"The Minbari save your crew and repair your ship. They take the weapons," she responded, wishing she had such an arresting smile at her disposal. It seemed unfair that she didn't. "Neroon attacked you. And we aren't even arguing over whether you did something to deserve it or not. But I saved you. So, see? Even."

"Oh! New math." He played with her glass a moment, giving it a half turn. Yager seemed to be paying no attention to her personal space. Or was intruding upon it quite purposefully. "No," he said finally, with certainty. She felt her face fall. Yager looked up and caught the expression. "You look so sad. Not what you wanted to hear? Alright, then tell me what you want to hear."

"I want you to say that you are going to forget that Neroon attacked you this morning. I want you to say that you and your crew are never going to talk about it outside yourselves again. I want you to say that you understand that you owe me your life and this is hardly a big request. I'm sick of this drama, damn it! And I want you to say that you are too."

He nodded sagely. "You want to hear a lot of things."

"I don't think it's asking too much, considering," Celina insisted, crossing her arms below her breasts. She cringed at hitting the bruise there. He seemed to take it as her not believing what she'd just said.

"Yes, I can see that," he replied. "If you want me to, I will say all of that."

"Good," she said, sighing, but then something struck her and she looked up to Mr. Yager with narrowed eyes. "And I want you to mean it."

"Ah." Yager pointed to her. "There we may have a problem."

"Damn it, it's not a game!" she said, slamming her hand down on the table. The water leapt within her glass. Several Minbari at nearby tables went silent and looked at them. For the first time, Yager looked taken by surprise. Somehow, that made him more tolerable, more Human. She apologized and drew back into herself. Even as she did that, she realized it was a mistake. The Minbari looked away, though some watched her from the periphery of their vision. Mr. Yager crowded the table again, seemingly sure of himself once more.

"Would you like to hear how I add things up? Hmm?" he asked, his voice low and quiet. She had to lean in a bit to hear him. "The Minbari prey on our weakened state so that they can get to our weapons."

"They could have let you die and taken the weapons anyway," she pointed out.

"Yes, yes," he replied, waving away what she said with his hand. "But they don't like to think of themselves as vultures. They get funny about honor. No, they come up with an excuse for them to take our weapons, expecting us to be thankful and pat them on the back, no less. I have the audacity to say my fill and speak to the Alyt as if I am his equal and he attacks me . . . an unarmed civilian! Yes, you did come to my aid, but you did so as one of _us,_ not one of _them_." He thought for a moment. "In my book, that leaves the Minbari owing me one more due. A big one."

"What do you expect?" Celina asked, splaying her hands out in front of her. "An apology?"

"Oh, I want Neroon to be sorry alright," he said and Celina shivered at the biting tone. "But I'll let you in on a little secret, Mrs. Neroon." Yager gestured with a hand for her to lean closer in. She looked him over warily before looking around them. Finally, she cautiously leaned in. "I don't plan to report Neroon for what he did." Celina released the breath she had been holding. "Well," he shrugged, "I don't want to. It's really all up to . . . you, actually."

Celina felt dread tighten her chest. "Me?"

"Yes," he said with a beatific smirk. "Like I said, I want him to be sorry. He doesn't like people touching his things. I can't do anything to his people, his ship, or his Shai'Alyt. But you, you I can touch. I want to get under his skin. And I think the best way to do that, is to get in yours."

She felt her eyes widen at the implication. A chill ran through her like a caress, followed by an unbearable heat.

"He doesn't even have to be aware of it. I won't tell. Just to know that I did it would be enough for me," he continued on, either not realizing or caring how still and pale she had become. "It might even make it the more sweet that he doesn't know." Celina slowly sat back in her chair. She looked around herself at the Minbari eating and talking, not realizing what was going on amongst them. His sheer gall made her sick to the stomach. "You give me this and we are even. I'm not asking much. Just lie back and think of Earth or Minbar, your choice." He wasn't even trying to coach his words in pleasantness now, though his tone still was. "Think of Neroon for all I care."

Celina felt control returning to her limbs. She was outraged at the suggestion. And the fact that he was making it in his honey voice along with a wicked smile. She reached out for her glass. For a sip. Her mouth was dry. That's what was on her mind, until her hand felt the coolness of the glass in her palm. Yager just kept smiling, though silent now. She quickly stood to attention, the glass in her hand, and his smile faltered for a moment. With a flick of the wrist, Celina threw the water in his face. He closed his eyes for a long moment. She slammed the glass back on the table.

"Mr. Yager," she said and he opened his eyes, "you can go to Hell."

-----

She felt quite satisfied with herself. That lasted about three minutes. Then the full brunt of realization hit her. Celina had to convince Mr. Yager to forget Neroon's actions. If she didn't, Branmer would take action to protect his Alyt and five people would die. And, no matter how satisfying it would be to let a bastard like Yager die, the other four members of his crew seemed like good enough people. She had nothing against them. Yet, if she didn't convince Yager they'd all be good, dead people.

Celina had no idea what to do.

She felt a headache coming on, driven by stress and fatigue. Finally arriving at their quarters, she decided to take a nap. There was no use in trying to think it over right now. A fresh mind and point of view was the key. Stripping, Celina ran the day over and over in her mind. It seemed so much had happened in one day. But that wasn't surprising; her days were hardly action-filled usually. This was the most action she'd seen in months. Finding herself too tired to even pull a nightgown over her head, she climbed into bed in just her underwear. Hopefully, the Alyt wouldn't believe she was trying to seduce him, or assuage his anger with her body. Considering the thought for several moments, Celina finally threw the blanket to the side and rose from the bed to pull on a loose t-shirt. She couldn't remember thinking once she returned to bed. Celina remembered hearing herself call out the lights and after that, everything was dark.

With hazy consciousness returned a sharp stillness. She knew she shouldn't move though she was not aware enough yet to realize why. Someone was in the room with her. Celina waited a long time for him to move. He never did. He was watching her. She could feel his gaze on her even in the near darkness. A candle was lit in the next room. She could see its light playing on the ceiling. It cast his shadow in deep contrast. Making him bigger than life. She could smell the smoke, the burning. He had never lit the candle before and she was unsure why he would do so now.

After an interminable time had passed, she finally found the courage to turn her head and look at him. The candle light cut his face into harsh planes. The flickering of the flame lent movement where there was none. She rested her cheek against the pillow and blinked her eyes sleepily. He moved forward slowly, not to intimidate her, but because he wasn't quite sure what he was doing. Finally, she was cast into shadow by him. Somehow, it made him easier to look upon.

'I wanted to kill you,' he said in a low timbre. It was quiet; a confession.

'You didn't.'

'For a moment,' he paused and seemed to remember it, letting the feeling infuse him, 'I was going to. I took the step. I raised my hand.' He raised his hand in front of him in evidence, clenching it into a fist.

'You didn't.'

He looked to her sharply before tilting his head to the side. He could have been smiling. 'You have a way about you. Did you know this? A look. In the same moment, it is both disarming and arresting. It can either return your victim's wits to their command or steal them away. If I thought you aware of it, I would think you intolerably manipulative. However, because you are not, it lends you a charming innocence.'

Celina considered this for several long moments.

'Is it such a horrible thing to realize you like your wife?' she asked, smiling to add a defense of humor to what was a serious question.

'It is when she is my enemy.'

'I had a similar realization several weeks ago,' Celina replied. 'You can imagine my dawning horror as I realized that I liked you, that I enjoyed our time together. Sometimes, I even like the idea of _us_. I don't want anyone to break that. If I had let you kill that man, it would have. This would have broken apart on so many levels. I couldn't let you do that. It wasn't a betrayal of you, Neroon.'

'What was it?'

'It was me refusing to give up what I see in you, what I want you to be, what you can be.'

'What is that?'

'Greater. Stronger. Wiser. More than a killer.'

He was silent, but inclined his head slightly in understanding or acknowledgement.

'You're worried,' she said, not asking. He nodded absently, looking at the wall behind the bed, casting his face in profile.

'I had not considered consequences before my actions, but now . . .'

'You worry.'

He sighed. 'I worry.'

'Don't worry about Yager. It will be taken care of. One way or another.'

'I do not wish Branmer to act dishonorably to erase the fact that I did,' he said to the wall, as if not quite willing to acknowledge whom he was confiding in.

Celina closed her eyes for a long moment in weariness and understanding. 'Don't worry about Yager, Neroon. I will take care of him.' She heard the slight rustle of clothing. He was looking at her again. Celina didn't open her eyes until she was sure he wouldn't see more than she wanted him to; confidence and compassion. 'Now come to bed and try to not think so loudly.'

Neroon dressed for bed and joined her, not bothering to snuff the candle. It burned and the play of shadowy figures dancing on the ceiling kept her mind busy. The Alyt was asleep or at least pretending to be. He was silent as death, bringing into stark review her own thoughts and worries. She had no idea what she was going to do. And the hours she had at her disposal to do it in slid through her fingers like sand, substantial but difficult to measure.

Finally, she slid from the bed and dressed quickly. Celina was silently thankful that she never saw Neroon open his eyes. He never looked at her, though she knew he was awake from the moment she moved from the bed. Neroon was too aware of his surroundings not to be. She wondered what he'd think she was doing. Perhaps it'd give her some ideas. Sighing, she moved to leave.

Smelling the fire, Celina paused at the door, but chose to leave it be. When she returned, she blew out the fire and watched the smoke claw the darkness as the bit of light left in the wick flared then faded.

-----

Celina had a bitter taste in her mouth and it wasn't just from the tea. The small cup was warm in her hands but she felt strangely numb. She wondered if she should be worried about that and wished there was a priest on board. Instead, she was sitting across a small table from Shai'Alyt Branmer in his quarters. Not much had happened so far. She had entered. He had motioned for her to sit. She sat. He had motioned for her to drink. She drank. He had set a silence. She kept it.

"I have found honor to be bittersweet," Branmer finally said.

"Like the tea," Celina added and he smiled.

"Like the tea," he agreed. "An acquired taste. Both are best sipped, not swallowed and choked upon like a thirsty man."

"There is a difference between them."

"Of course."

Celina looked to him blankly, not quite sure what she was thinking. "You eventually get used to the bitterness in tea."

"Some get used to the bitterness of honor, as well."

"Then why did you say there was a difference between them?"

He seemed to think this over quite seriously. "Because one is a drink and one is a concept, Ms. Amador."

She blinked.

"That was humor," Branmer pointed out. "I do have a sense of humor and you are allowed to laugh."

She smiled, just a little but anything more than that would have been obviously forced.

"Would I be wrong to say that Mr. Yager's honor is of the bitter variety?" he asked over the rim of his cup before taking a sip.

_"I am a man of my word, Mrs. Neroon. I just don't give it for sentimental reasons. Mine is a transaction. We have a transaction. Give for gain."_ Mr. Yager's words ran through her mind. She tried to sweep them aside but they were persistent. Somehow, he had dug himself an ugly hole in her mind. Everything she remembered about him festered there now. It always would. Thankfully, it was a small hole, easily overlooked. But not right now. Now it hurt, a beat with her pulse inside her head.

"No," she finally replied, running her thumb over the rim of her cup to smear away the slight print from her lipstick. Celina only put on make-up when she wanted people to see her. Today she put it on because she didn't want to see herself. "But his is a variety quite alien to me. More alien than yours."

"Did he do the honorable thing?"

Somehow that seemed extremely funny to her. She laughed but there was no humor in it. Branmer looked unsettled by it, almost as if he wished she'd stop. Too bad he had given her permission to laugh. Now she would laugh.

Because it wasn't time to cry.

_She had cried then. Mr. Yager didn't take vicious joy in it, like she had expected and would've wanted him to. If he had, it would have made him easier to hate. Instead, he had waited for the first tears to stop, rubbing her back as she had his when he was hurt. Finally, the tears just refused to come and she thought that he had perhaps changed his mind and that he would just be reasonable. Then his touch began to trail and turned into a caress. She hated him even as she made herself respond to him. Later, he would cry, but it would be dry and exultant, torn from them both as she was left gasping on the floor for breath, a hand around her throat. _

"He will do the right thing," she answered. "He won't press charges against Neroon. He won't go to the press."

"Are you sure?" Branmer asked, the cup settled in between his hands.

"Yes. I can't be completely certain that he would keep his word for word's sake. So I took further precaution." Celina sipped from her tea. The Shai'Alyt looked inquisitive. She'd have to explain. To an extent. "I told him in no uncertain terms that if he were to bring charges against Neroon, I will testify that Mr. Yager threatened me on our first meeting, in Neroon's presence. I will testify that he later propositioned me. I will testify that he violated me. I thought a threat best, since Humans lie. I don't entirely trust him to keep his word. But I trust him to not bring himself to court or the press only to be tarred and feathered. After all, once word gets out about me and my position here, at the worst I'll be seen as a martyr and at best a twisted hero. He now knows better than to mess with a martyr's cross and a hero's mission."

The Shai'Alyt was very still and was looking to her almost askance. "Is that true?"

"Which part?" she asked, rubbing the rim of her teacup.

"Did he violate you?"

"Like I said," Celina smiled, "Humans lie."

Branmer seemed to accept this.

"I put it in terms he could understand," she said, biting her lip for a moment. "It's all a matter of give and gain. If he gives further pain, I'll make sure that's all he stands to gain."

_His face was surprised again. Then almost pleased. She was buttoning her shirt while explaining his position to him. He was already dressed, having never really taken off his clothes. But her, he had stripped her to the bone. _

_"They do say imitation is the highest form of flattery," he laughed. She bristled and demanded for him to explain. "Well, you do see, don't you? You played me. Just like I would've. Just like me. Of course, you are making this more personal than it had to be."_

_"Personal?" Celina hissed. "What do you call that?" she gestured with her chin to the space of floor between them, more to invoke the memory of it than the actual fact of it. He smiled. "I call that personal," she ended._

_"Child, I wasn't doing that to you," he explained as if it was quite charmingly innocent that she hadn't figured it out yet. "I was doing that to Neroon." _

_Her gut twisted as she realized the full picture of Yager's frustrations with her husband. Knees weak, stomach sick, and generally sore, Celina let her face show the disgust she could not voice. Yager held his chin a bit higher, a prideful gesture. Strangely, it reminded her of Neroon. It was deeply unsettling. _

_"I should have let him kill you," she said spitefully, moving to the door._

_"Then they would have had to kill us all," he replied._

_"I should have let them," Celina said but didn't really mean it. Not in her heart. _

_"I would've," he told her. And that's why she didn't, she realized. _

"When will the repairs to the ship be done?" Celina asked now, contemplating the depths of her tea.

"It's already done."

"No difficulties with translation or configurations?"

"No," he replied.

"No mistakes?"

"No."

She suddenly remembered the Minbari ability to be quite literal in their wording and their lies. "Nothing purposeful?"

He looked slightly taken aback by her directness, showing it in stillness, but he blinked and it was gone. "No. You took care of that."

Celina held back a cringe. "Then they can leave. And we can all forget about them."

"That would appear to be so," he replied.

"How soon can they leave?" she asked, a little anticipatorily.

"As soon as you finish that tea, walk out that door, and I contact my Alyt," Branmer answered. Celina nodded and downed the rest of her tea like a thirsty man. He seemed slightly amused by this, instead of offended. Perhaps because he wanted them off his ship just as much. They both placed their cups on the table between them and rose to their feet. He dismissed her offhandedly and moved towards his computer console. "Tell me, do you enjoy being a martyr?" His question surprised her. She turned back to him and wondered how perceptive of a man he was.

"I am a catholic, Shai'Alyt," she answered. "To us, it's an honor."

-----

Thank you for reading. I would dearly appreciate it if you'd take a moment to make my day and leave me a note telling me what you thought of my story. If you leave an email to contact you by, I would like to thank you for reading and answer any questions you may wish to pose.

Please continue on to the next chapter . . .


	9. Chapter 9

**Chapter Nine:**

_"Trouble will come in its own time. It always does ... but that's tomorrow. Give me today and I will be happy."_  
- Sheridan: "Epiphanies"

-----

It seemed both strange and right that life returned just as quickly to normality as it had veered from it. Or at least, her latest version of normality. Three weeks passed with each day a slow triumph over boredom or dangerous melancholy. Though no trials were placed before her harder than how to play Go Fish with one player or testing a strange new addition to the Mess Hall menu (a bad idea, she deemed it after she had two hours on her knees in the bathroom to think it over), somehow over the last week, she had felt remarkably drained, physically. Celina realized that her body must have finally caught up with her emotions and decided to ignore it. Ever after a nap, she felt surprisingly refreshed. Though, the extra sleep seemed to be giving her transitory headaches. Celina would never become quite accustomed to such a level of inactivity.

Her relationship with the Alyt was almost strangely pleasant at times, as comfortable with shared words as silences. The latter worked between them the best, as neither was forced to communicate in an alien language. They had come to an unspoken agreement to leave the events of Mr. Yager and his crew in the past where it belonged. Celina was quite pleased with this arrangement and Neroon appeared to be, too.

Nine days (the Minbari seemed to unconsciously segment their lives and decisions in accordance to threes) after the Humans had went on their merry way, Neroon had taken her back to the Sparring Room. Each time, she withstood the frustrations of sparring with a hopelessly more skilled opponent. He, meanwhile, seemed to have decided to amuse himself by coming up with bizarre scenarios for her to have reason to attack him in. Neroon said that reason -even imagined reason- could give passion and precision to a goal, even in the attack.

She had never realized that he had such a sense of imagination but she was aware of his wicked sense of humor. Both came in to play.

He smiled, leaning on his staff nonchalantly, seeming most strangely at ease in this room. 'I want you to imagine again.' She groaned and he laughed. 'Do Humans keep pets? Small animals, big animals; domesticated, hopefully?'

'Yes,' she replied. 'Some of us do.'

'Do _you_?' Neroon saw her witty retort coming a mile away and cut her off before she could get her word in. 'No, I do not count. And I didn't mean at the moment, Celina. I meant generally.'

'Yes, to some extent,' she said, a bit grumpy at having her wit cut off before she had the chance to make use of it. 'Though none that I really wanted. My mother is allergic to most kinds of animal fur. So most of my pets were cold blooded. Fish and reptiles mostly. My father's idea of a great pet, not mine. I always wanted a cat.'

'Cat?'

'Small, furry mammal about this big,' she gestured with her hands, 'Likes to purr. Thinks it's a superior being. Actually, I bet you and a cat would get along. I almost brought one on board. But once our Minbari contact caught word of that, it was a definite no-no. Apparently, one Earth native is all the ship can take.'

'Wise decision,' Neroon concluded. Celina giggled a bit to herself. 'What is so funny?'

'Oh,' she said, shuffling her feet slightly. 'I just had a thought.' He waited for her to share, so she did. 'Well, I was just thinking it would have been funny if I had brought a cat onboard and we found out that Minbari are allergic to cat fur too. Imagine how quickly it could move through the air circulation! The great Minbari warrior caste brought to their knees by cat fur. Though I wonder what we'd do with the cat, once we figured that out. Shave it? Poor cat!'

'No, that would never work,' he replied, seemingly considering the idea. 'The hair would just grow back. That'd never do!' Celina nodded. 'There would only be one solution in such an emergency.'

She waited for him to explain. He looked to her as if startled out of his thought and surprised that she had not found the same solution.

'We'd have to space it,' Neroon said and Celina felt her eyes widen and mouth slacken. 'Definitely,' he murmured to himself. His eyes slid to her sidelong and he added wickedly, 'Or eat it.'

'Eat it!' she exclaimed, hazily she caught the sound of what might have been a muffled snicker from somewhere in the room.

'Certainly. You've tried our protein substitute. It's unpalatable. Why waste the real thing?'

'B-because you can't eat a cat!' Celina objected.

He seemed to consider this. 'Have you ever tried?'

'No! And neither should you!'

'Why?'

'Because it is wrong and because . . .' she thought to herself for a moment. 'It'll make your nether regions wither and fall off.' Celina definitely heard a snort of stifled laughter there but she focused on the Alyt.

Neroon stilled and just blinked at that. Then he smiled and slowly began to laugh. She laughed with him.

'I want you to imagine that I just fed your cat to a Pak'ma'ra,' he finally said, taking fighting stance with practiced ease.

'Why would you do that?'

'Because I'm mean,' Neroon answered. 'Now attack me.'

'Tell me, is this the same Pak'ma'ra that pushed me down the stairs?' she asked, taking her time moving to a good starting position.

'Yes,' he replied. 'Now attack me.'

'Forget about you!' she said, standing up again. 'Get me the Pak'ma'ra. I have a bone to pick with that bastard!'

'Actually, I was behind the whole thing,' the Alyt said, motioning for her to get back in position. She ignored him. 'I paid the Pak'ma'ra to push you down those stairs. It was me. Now attack me.'

'You made a Pak'ma'ra push me down some stairs and then fed him my cat?' she asked in feigned shock. 'My god, Neroon, what did I ever do to you?'

Both Neroon and Celina turned their heads when they heard two female Minbari laugh where they were stretching a short distance away. The guilty party ducked their heads and refused to make eye contact with anyone but didn't try to disguise their laughter. Obviously, they had been following the conversation.

'It seems,' Neroon said, rising from his starting position, 'that you are done fighting with me today.' He reached out and took her staff before leaning in closer to add, 'Except verbally, of course.' The Alyt looked to her pointedly, disapprovingly, but she knew better than to think him mad. She smiled and he looked her over strangely. His sharpness blunted, Celina wondered if she had just unconsciously used the 'look' Neroon had accused her of in the past. He turned to move away, but paused mid-gesture. It was then that she realized that the laughter had stopped and she looked quickly to where he did. She just caught the barest moment between when they were caught and when they looked away. The two Minbari had apparently been watching the nonverbal exchange of body language between Celina and Neroon a moment ago with frank interest. Now, with a pointed glare sent in their direction by the Alyt, they were all business.

'Why do you always retrieve and put away the staffs for us, Neroon?' she asked as they walked back to their quarters. It was very early morning. While Celina would go back to sleep – she was so tired! - he would shower, dress for the day, and be long gone by the time she rose for breakfast. 'You're the ranking officer. Shouldn't I do it? Seems a kind of menial job.'

'And standing doing nothing while you run back and forth with the staffs is a better use of my time?' he asked, in an offhand manner, not looking at her but at the corridor in front of them.

'We both know you can't stand in one place and do nothing, Neroon. You would immediately be correcting some other hapless warrior who was not holding his weapon just right or looking at his enemy right or breathing right. I think if you were ordered to do nothing, you'd still be incapable of it. You'd still be hard at work thinking about some important duty and ranting to yourself about how it's completely unreasonable that they would expect you to stand around and do nothing. If you stood in one place and did nothing, I think the universe would actually stop in shock. The stars would stop burning. Planets would stop spinning. I can't be certain but I think the laws of physics would be so confused they wouldn't work right anymore.'

He didn't look at her, but he did smile.

'What I'm getting at here is, well, best said in English.' She came to a stop and he took a couple steps before stopping as well and looking back at her. "I don't buy it, bub."

'Are you saying that I am lying?' he asked slowly.

'Stop trying to start a fight where there is none,' she said, swatting away his words with a flick of the hand. 'How could you be lying? You didn't even make a statement. No, what I said means I am not falling for whatever trick you're trying to put me through. Meaning, I realized you didn't actually answer my question. You were trying to distract me. I won't be distracted. Why do you deal with the staffs?'

'I have simply become accustomed to it,' he explained. 'I always do so with the Shai'Alyt. You are right; a superior officer does not deal with such tasks. That is the duty of the lower ranking officer. You will not find that in any rulebooks. That's simply how it is usually done.'

'Then I should be doing that!' she said. 'Why didn't you just tell me?'

'I chose this time of day not because it was necessarily the most convenient for us, but because this tends to be the least favored time of the day for sparring. Very few of the crew choose now as a pleasant time for such things. Consequently, the room is hardly occupied.' Neroon frowned. 'I am more than your superior in this field and I am easily able to make you look like a child or a fool. That does not mean I wish to do so. None the less in front of a crowd. There is nothing to be gained by that but pettiness. As to the staffs,' he paused and seemed to consider himself for a moment, 'you are not an officer and thus we cannot rely upon such rankings with you. I will not treat you as if you are an officer. That is an insult to both sides. Seems an even trade then that I should deal with the staffs. Any perceived damage I might take to my reputation is immediately rectified once we spar. I cannot hide that my skills are far superior to yours.'

She stood in silence for a couple moments, working a thought out in her mind. Neroon gave a single nod and continued walking down the corridor. Celina rushed to join him a moment later, catching him at the lift. They waited for it to arrive.

'Neroon?'

He made a noncommittal sound that let her know that he was listening.

'Can I ask you a question?'

Same sound.

'Do you really think all this strategy out before you do everything? Because if so, I don't see how you ever get anything done.'

'Actually, I don't,' he answered and looked to her from the corners of his eyes, though still facing forefront. 'My full brilliance is only apparent to me in retrospection. I suppose it is the universe's way of making sure I do it more often.'

She smiled and chuckled to herself. The lift arrived. Neroon walked in and turned to face the front. When she did not follow, he gave an expectant look.

'I don't think there's enough room in there for all three of us,' Celina said. 'You and I aren't very big, but your ego sure is.'

'You do not have permission to be on this floor without my presence,' he reminded her. The doors began to close. 'Such a pity, I will have to page security on you.'

Celina threw out her hand and caught the door. She quickly boarded the lift. A few seconds later, another Minbari hurried to follow her. He carried a rack of stoppered test tubes with various levels of murky liquid in them. They looked fragile and by the way that he was holding it, they were. Celina moved to stand rather closely beside Neroon to give the other Minbari more space.

'You play dirty,' she whispered to him sotto voce.

'You like it,' he replied in the same manner. Celina snorted and quickly raised a hand to cover the gesture. The other Minbari began to turn his head as if to look at them behind him but seemed to reconsider it at the last moment. He shuffled his feet in apparent discomfort with being in an enclosed space with the two of them.

'Oh, Neroon, I think he just stepped on your brilliance,' she said and the other Minbari actually did look back at them, then to his feet.

'He wouldn't dare,' the Alyt intoned in a deadly drawl.

The lift came to a stop and the door began to open.

'Do I ever get the last word?' Celina asked, ignoring how the Minbari quickly began to skirt out of the lift before the door fully opened, but he was having a difficult time making the speed he obviously wished while navigating the rack of samples.

'Not in actuality,' Neroon answered and she grumbled to herself. He looked to her with narrowed eyes. 'Did you just say, "Grumble, grumble?"'

She looked a little abashed. 'Well, I couldn't think of anything decent. But I knew I wanted to grumble. And who actually pays attention to what someone is grumbling anyway? Isn't the purpose of a grumble for the other person to not be paying attention to the words?'

The Minbari looked back at them over his shoulder as he began walking down the outside corridor.

'Obviously, you weren't grumbling correctly,' Neroon pointed out, looking straight ahead.

Celina couldn't think of a good retort to that so she simply crossed her arms and watched the lift door close. She smiled as she thought of the two in the sparring room and the bewildered look on the other Minbari's face. It appeared they had no idea how to categorize this strange relationship. They weren't the only ones, she realized and snuck a glance at Neroon.

-----

Neroon had paced for nearly an hour on another seemingly random day, alternating between ranting and brooding silences. The Alyt had been in such a dither when he had returned very shortly after he had left their quarters to begin his day that all she had to do was make an offhand remark ('Well that was quick . . .') and he was off in a rant about the inanity of religious caste rituals and a certain otherwise brilliant war leader that appeared to have forgotten that he was no longer a high priest but a Shai'Alyt! Somehow, she doubted he was ranting out loud for her sake; more at the universe in general. For a while, she just let him continue on with his one person diatribe. At one point, Celina even left to take a quick shower to wake up, hoping that he wouldn't mind. When she came out in jeans and a pullover, she wasn't surprised to see that he was sitting on the couch, dwelling, resting his chin on a clenched fist and staring at the wall across from him with such intensity that she expected it capable of superficially scorching the surface. For a few moments, she thought that he was staring in that direction for no particular reason. That is, until she remembered that that wall was in fact the only barrier between their quarters and the Shai'Alyt's. He didn't seem to have noticed that she had left at all. So, she shrugged and took a seat on the other end of the couch.

It was somewhat amusing to see Neroon make reference to Branmer with something less than the awe that seemed to tinge the ever-present respect. He obviously still respected him, but at that moment, he didn't seem to like him very much.

'Alright,' she said in a soft voice, hoping that he wouldn't run off in another string of Minbari. It was difficult to follow him when he spoke so swiftly and he would make references that she wasn't quite sure she was translating correctly. 'first off, let's talk about these . . . um . . . what did you say? '_Grinding_ religious rituals?''

'In this case, one ritual,' he said, a bit crankily. 'Specifically: The Awakening.'

'And how does this involve _grinding_?' she asked and Neroon looked for the barest moment confused, then almost embarrassed, then amused.

'It does not involve grinding,' he explained. 'Well, not necessarily,' Neroon added before continuing. 'You didn't quite translate the context of that word correctly. In that use, it has a different connotation and was used to express my great dislike for the subject matter. It was an inappropriate expletive.'

'Grinding . . .' she said to herself.

'You should be careful with the use of that particular word,' he cautioned her.

Celina tried to imagine how such a word could be considered an expletive. When she thought of grinding, a mental image of her grandmother crushing herbs in her small, stone mortar and pestle came to mind. She still couldn't imagine how that could be inappropriate. Then she thought of the motion of the grinding with the mortal and pestle and knew _exactly_ how it was inappropriate!

'Neroon!' Celina said in shock, a bit of embarrassment at the mental image and Neroon's part in it made a slight blush climb up her neck and into her cheeks. He did not seem repentant. She was also slightly embarrassed that it had taken her so long to catch on. Celina cleared her throat. 'Explain this Awakening. What is awakening exactly?'

'It is a post-nuptial ritual. The first; though there is a disagreement between not only the castes but even the clans as to its true significance or even worth. The warrior caste may give a nod to its existence but generally ignore it,' Neroon informed her before glaring again at the wall. 'I was planning to do so. I was not even aware of the significance of today. However, the Shai'Alyt is. And due to his intrinsic religious sensibilities, he is quite adamant that we observe the ritual in full.'

Celina nodded at this information. 'So, I follow. However, what exactly is the ritual and what is its significance? Why's it called The Awakening? I really would like to know what's supposed to be awakening here.'

Neroon rubbed a moment at his eyes with the hand he had been leaning his chin on. 'Its significance is derived from arcane religious mathematical equations concerning amongst other things your age, my age, the date of our marriage, the length of our relationship from our first meeting to our marriage, whether any children had been born into either of our clans within a Minbari year of our marriage, the combined length of time between when our parents were married to the date of our individual births, the deaths of any clan members within a Minbari year of our marriage, the deaths of any of the Gray Council, which caste we both belong to, which clan is in dominance at the time of our marriage, which ca-'

'I get it!' Celina quickly interrupted. 'Who did this math? The Shai'Alyt?'

'No,' Neroon replied, 'apparently, some religious acolytes have been working on it since our nuptials and were kind enough to inform Branmer.'

'I see,' she said to herself while trying to think of how to ask her next question without sounding like a broken record. She gave up. 'Why's it called The Awakening?'

'Because it is supposed to signify an understanding within and between us. Since the rebirth ceremony we were considered to be enduring what is perceived to be a very difficult time in marriage, when it is new and we are struggling from our past preconception of being one alone. This day is supposed to mark our triumph and awakening into a new perception of the universe, no longer one alone but one together. Today, you will be written into the annals of my clan as my wife.' The tone of his voice spoke volumes as to his personal feelings towards this. He explained it in a manner that made it obvious that he did not come up with these philosophies himself. These were the thoughts and ideals of religious philosophers. There was also a strange almost whimsy in his voice at times, as if he believed that that was how it was supposed to be. Of course it was, because the religious caste said so and the warrior caste were taught to acquiesce to them in such matters. It was their way. However, what set her on edge was the bite of bitterness in his tone that was not certain in her perception until the last ending statement. He was slightly resentful that though that is how it was supposed to be, that was how it would never be.

'I understand,' Celina told him and hoped that he understood her full meaning of that. He looked to her sharply and with consideration. She just looked back. Neroon blinked and sat back, still not at ease. For a moment, he had thought that she had perhaps meant what she had but now she could tell that he had dismissed that thought. He didn't believe she could understand. Neroon would rather think that he suffered alone. Ironically, that was part of the reason that it would never be how he obviously thought it should be. She considered for a moment telling him that, but she decided against it as a waste of breath. He wouldn't listen when he didn't want to hear. 'So what do we need to do?'

They weren't allowed to see or interact with another being for the entire day. Apparently, Branmer believed that since Neroon had only seen him, it could be excused with proper prayers that the Shai'Alyt was even willing to do in his stead. The Alyt would be excused from all other duties, to the exception of an emergency. The day was meant to be spent exclusively in each other's company. Light meals of ritualistic food and drink would be delivered at their door at the appropriate times. Otherwise, the day was their own to do with as they wished.

Neroon wished to return to his duties. It took him five minutes before he was on the computer console. However, he only entered in his access code then sat back and chuckled at the screen. He looked over to her and gestured towards the console.

'He's locked me out of everything but emergency communications.'

'I would let you use my code,' she said, amiably. 'But I don't believe I even have access to emergency communications.'

They were both silent for a couple of minutes. Neroon went a surprising amount of time without moving anything. He was just looking at her feet. This was a bit unnerving, but she didn't think he was actually _seeing_ her feet. He was thinking. This seemed a bit worse. Was he thinking about her feet? What could he be thinking about her feet? They looked just like his feet but smaller. She had pretty nice feet. But she still didn't like him looking at them. Finally, Celina tucked them underneath herself and away from his eyes. He blinked and his patience with the level of inactivity was broken.

'This is _inane_,' he muttered to the wall.

'Mmm-hmm,' Celina hummed in an agreeable manner.

'There is no point in this.' It was starting to rub her the wrong way that he wasn't even looking to her while talking with her sitting so close that if he reached out with almost the full length of his arm, he could touch her.

'Grinding tradition!' she said with mock sincerity. He actually looked at her with this. She smiled a bit uncertainly, not sure she had used it in its correct fashion. 'You could meditate,' she suggested and at his sour look asked, 'You do meditate, don't you?'

'I am capable of it. It is a discipline learned in every Minbari's training. However . . .' he trailed off. Celina lifted her brows expectantly. 'While some enjoy it, I merely achieved the required level of skill necessary.'

'Neroon, are you telling me that there is actually a Minbari discipline that you are not superior in?' she asked, not able to help herself from teasing him. He looked to her humorlessly. Celina continued anyways. 'I believe my world is shattering. Does this mean there are other things you are not superior in?'

'I am superior in all important disciplines,' he said, playing along with her by exaggerating the extent of his ego. She knew he was sure in himself and his ability, but it rarely edged on hubris. 'Especially those worthwhile.'

'_All_ important and worthwhile disciplines?' she asked and he inclined his head with surety. Celina smiled. 'I'll take that to mean, 'Grinding right,'' she said, meaning a verbal translation of his confidence in what he had said. She had been assuming that the verb 'grind' in this context was much like the word 'fuck' and thus had used it accordingly and perhaps with more confidence than she would have with the latter word, as its meaning was more familiar to her. Over the years of its use, 'fuck' had somewhat lost its more sexual connotation, except when directly employed in such a manner. From his reaction to what she said, 'grind' had not lost its sexual insinuation.

Neroon looked slightly shocked at what she just said then over the course of a few moments an almost licentious smile and amusement came upon him. 'Yes, that is one of them,' he replied finally.

Celina looked away and raised a cooler hand against her cheeks that were quickly becoming overly warm. She had hoped that it wouldn't be terribly obvious but by his low chuckle, he certainly noticed and was enjoying himself. With a strange moment of hesitance at the thought, she realized she was enjoying this too. Celina looked back to him, raking her eyes over his face. She liked him best, she decided, when he was laughing and playing with her because he was not thinking. And perhaps, she liked him best when she was not thinking either.

'Promise me,' he said, 'that you will keep the use of your newfound word between us.'

'Fine,' she agreed with a small, less-than-unconscious use of a pout. 'If I am frustrated, I will curse in an Earth language like any decent Human being. And maybe a little Centauri when I want to feel a bit naughty.'

Neroon nodded and Celina felt the pause pull out that could signal the end of the shaky almost erotic play between them. She felt a sharp pain in the pit of her stomach at the thought. Celina didn't want it to stop yet. She was quite curious about how far Neroon would go with it, how far she would go with it. Some part of her thought of that curiosity as deviant but she had spent endless hours in shamelessly wicked conversation with many Centauri. It was almost as much a prerequisite for Centauri get-togethers as the liquor. When she had returned to Earth after the war her mother had been scandalized with how easily in friendly company Celina would deviate to the bawdy. From that moment, her mother had tried to nearly beat the habit out of her. Consequently, she had returned to a more appropriately reserved state and Celina was glad for it generally, but she knew she still had an appreciation for the frankness and excitement of such things. That was the feeling she was craving and holding onto now, the excitement at being a sexual being and making another feel the same. Celina wasn't sure how it'd work with Neroon but she suddenly had the overwhelming desire to try.

'Neroon,' she said in a sure voice. He looked at her inquisitively. 'I want to play Strip Poker.'

The Alyt appeared slightly confused. So, she explained the game to him, leaving the tedious intricacies to if he complied to play. She didn't want to overwhelm him with details. He seemed reticent and looked her over sidelong as if he wasn't quite sure what he thought of her motives behind such a thing. Apparently, Neroon needed a cemented reason to agree.

'Unless you'd rather meditate,' she added and that seemed to decide it.

'Get the cards,' he ordered, sitting back and obviously not letting himself think of the full extent of what he had just agreed to. Celina flashed a smile and quickly went to retrieve her cards from the bedroom along with discreetly adding a few more articles of clothing.

-----

Thank you for reading. I would dearly appreciate it if you'd take a moment to make my day and leave me a note telling me what you thought of my story. If you leave an email to contact you by, I would like to thank you for reading and answer any questions you may wish to pose.

Please continue on to the next chapter . . .


	10. Chapter 10

**Chapter Ten:**

_"Right now, I want to introduce you to the ultimate means of interstellar understanding, the Earthers call it poker." _  
- Londo: "Revelations"

-----

At first, she had thought it unfair that Neroon entered into the game with several more layers of clothing than she did. Celina had surreptitiously watched him dress in the past, amazed at the intricacies of several garments and mystified by the purpose of several others. They had even argued for a couple minutes over whether her charm bracelet was equivalent to his outer vest. Finally, he had conceded that she didn't have enough clothing on to put more than one piece down at a time. Otherwise, the game would have ended far too quickly and wouldn't have proved as lasting a distraction. Since, Neroon had no idea what the rules of the game were supposed to be, she took a few liberties in adding her own. Mainly, that once a player ran out of clothing, if they lost a game, in the place of taking off a piece of clothing, he or she had to put on a piece of the other player's clothing that they had won in past hands. Not necessarily in the manner that it was designed to be worn in, either. When Celina first came up with this, it was mainly to supply her with a way that she could quickly get dressed again should she have a bad run of hands at an inconvenient point. She had also had a somewhat silly notion of seeing what she would look like in various pieces of the Minbari warrior uniform. Neroon had agreed to it, being quite sure in his own victory after she had explained how to win each hand.

'This would be a nice time for you to play a good hand, Neroon,' she said in an offhand manner, while rearranging her cards in her hand. Celina had already lost three bracelets, her shoes, and one sock. They were all in a rather pitiful pile to Neroon's side. Meanwhile, Celina had a rather impressive pile of uniform behind her. He had played several lucky hands at the beginning of the game, but it appeared his luck had run out. Now, he was sitting across from her on the floor bare chested, playing to hold onto his boots, pants, and whatever garments hid under each. He grumbled something unintelligible under his breath while frustratingly rearranging his cards in his hand (she noticed that he seemed to have picked up that latter habit from watching her and it made her smile). 'Would you like me to explain the difference between the flushes again?' Celina asked a little too innocently.

'I don't think you are shuffling correctly,' he replied, throwing down three cards and drawing three from the deck. Neroon actually laughed at what he drew. Celina placed down one card before drawing from the deck. She just lifted one eyebrow at what she saw.

'What do you bet?' she asked, ignoring his statement about her shuffling skills.

'My left boot.' He appeared rather confident.

'I bet my shirt.' Celina said and his confidence seemed to waver that she was so sure of herself to bet her shirt instead of her sock, as would have been expected. 'What do you got?'

'Flush.' Neroon laid the cards out before him. She hissed as if she had been put in quite a position.

'Pretty good,' she replied, then smiled. 'But not good enough. Straight flush.'

'Flush beats straight flush,' he said and she frowned.

'No, it doesn't,' Celina objected, seemingly surprised that she was having to explain this again. 'I've explained flushes to you two times.'

'Yes and each time, you stated that flush beats straight flush.'

'I did not! Straight flush beats flush. It goes royal flush, straight flush, then flush. Just think about it, Neroon, does it make sense that those cards would beat these?'

'You are expecting me to apply reason to this game?' he asked incredulously.

'Fine! I might've made the mistake in saying that flush beats straight flush, but that doesn't change the fact that straight flush beats flush and I have a straight flush, so I win. Give me your boot.' She held out her hand expectantly.

'No,' he replied. 'By the rules stated, I am the winner.'

Celina glared at him for several long moments. Neroon looked back in a way that clearly communicated that he was not going to lose this one.

'Compromise?' she offered and he considered it a moment. 'Your boot for my shirt?'

He nodded and began to take off his boot. Celina sighed before peeling the pullover off her back. Neroon tossed his boot onto the pile beside her. She threw the pullover at him, causing him to catch it against his chest before adding it to his pile. Neroon reached out and began to gather the cards up to shuffle the deck again when the door chimed.

Both looked at the door surprised. In comical synchronicity, they looked down at themselves and their various levels of undress then at each other's.

"Not it!" Celina said quickly, throwing up her hands. Neroon frowned. 'Really, I'm shirtless!'

'So am I,' he pointed out.

'But I have breasts,' she replied with a smile. The Alyt seemed unable to trump that so he answered the door.

Celina was relieved when there was no one outside. Neroon looked down and they both saw that a large tray with various dishes had been set on their doorstep, so to speak. He quickly gathered it up and closed the door.

"Minbari room service," she said to no one in particular, pulling herself off the floor to follow over to where Neroon was placing the tray on the coffee table. 'Is there any particular way we are supposed to eat it?'

'I do not believe so,' he responded, sitting and looking over the array of dishes. Most appeared to be variations of finger foods.

'You don't know?' she asked with surprise, sitting a short distance away from him on the couch. Neroon looked to her dryly.

'You cannot expect me to know the intricacies of _all_ Minbari rituals.'

'I suppose not. But I would suppose you'd know about what's supposed to go on in this one, since it's the first post-nuptial ritual. I mean you knew so much about everything else.'

Neroon was spooning some type of green crème on what appeared to be a small, triangular slice of flat bread. 'It is considered in bad taste to discuss what one actually does during this particular ritual.'

Celina followed his example and tried the crème with the flat bread. The bread was rather plain and smudged a bit of flour on her fingers but the crème was savory. She wondered if he'd be offended if she added more to the same piece of bread since she had been afraid of the crème at first and hadn't put more than the smallest dollop.

A silence fell between them and her mind began to wander. Celina ran the Minbari expectations of marriage through her head, comparing them to her own. She wondered how difficult it was for him to be placed in a position that would never compare to what one would hold up as being the relationship or understanding to aspire to. Then her mind became perplexed as she wondered on what was the Minbari idea of the perfect couple. And she wondered on how it compared to the Human ideal. Yes, the perfect couple wasn't necessarily the business man with the beautiful wife, athletic son, and musical daughter, all ensconced in suburbs with a white picket fence anymore. Life was rarely that simple. But it still was held on a pedestal as a pretty good thing, such long held social beliefs being difficult to let go of. However, the idea of what constituted a married couple had greatly expanded and changed to adjust to Humanity's expanse into the stars. It was just hard to say this was how it was supposed to be and it couldn't work another way when one could go to another star system and see it a different way and see it working. Some believed that it had tainted them, like Home Guard; most believed they were the better for it.

Her marriage to Neroon however, would probably be considered by most as taking it a bit too far. Of course, there had been stories about men and women experimenting with social and sexual limits with aliens ever since Earth Alliance had made contact with the Centauri about a hundred years before. Most were spoken of in the same manner that someone would talk about their wild college days and that one time they got a little too drunk. So far, Celina had never heard of a Human marrying an alien.

'Neroon,' she said before considering that it would break the silence. He looked to her as if slightly displeased to have been disrupted from his ponderings. Celina ignored that. 'Before being forced to marry me, what type of person did you imagine you would marry?'

He looked to her in a chiding manner. 'I do not sit around imagining such things.'

'You have no idea?' she asked, before taking a bite of some kind of small fruit. It was very sweet.

'I have never considered it,' Neroon replied and seemed to think the matter ended.

'But if you did,' Celina continued and he looked to her torn between amusement and annoyance that she ignored his unspoken wishes so easily when she wanted to. 'What would you imagine?'

'A mute,' he answered dryly. She tilted her chin down and gave him an unamused look. Neroon returned it with a small, self-satisfied smile before taking a drink of juice. She had realized that there was only one cup.

'I will keep asking until you answer,' she said and that bit of smile faded from his face. He placed the cup down with just the barest hint more force than was needed. Celina had noticed it a common gesture amongst a couple of the Minbari that she had interacted with. When they began closing things or setting things down a little more forcefully than needed, it was a warning that you were forcing them to go someplace that they didn't want to be. 'I mean it. Eventually you will answer me seriously just to shut me up. So, it stands to reason, that you should just answer now and save us both the trouble.'

'I suppose,' he said in a terse manner, 'that I expected I would marry someone that I held respect for.'

That quieted her for a few moments as she thought about the full implication of that statement.

"Ouch," Celina said, smiling but not really in humor. She reached out belatedly to grab a piece of flat bread, holding it in both hands a moment, just for something to do with them. Finally, she raised it to her mouth, and said, 'That hurt,' before taking a bite. Risking a glance, Celina found his face in tight control, expressing no emotion but the general feeling of scrutiny that always lingered in his manner and features. But his eyes didn't hold the same bite or even malice that was there when he was intentionally trying to hurt her. And he had done that often enough for her to recognize that look. No, he hadn't thought through the entire implication of his last statement and how it would affect her once said, but now that it was said, he was not going to apologize. 'What about love?' she finally asked, smearing the flour left on her fingertips between her thumb and forefinger.

'I thought that would be obvious,' he responded to her surprise.

'What do you mean by that?'

'Minbari do not marry where they do not love.'

'Except for us,' Celina reminded, placing what was left of the piece of bread back on the plate.

'There is love in this,' he said and she looked to him sharply in response. Neroon lifted his brow at the obvious harshness in her manner towards him. 'The love of our people and our duty to them. Yes, it is not the love one would expect for others but between us that is what is binding. It is enough.'

'I suppose for me, that is the best I could hope for in any case,' she said, reaching out unconsciously for the cup in thirst. He obviously didn't understand. 'I just have always thought that such a fateful love spoken of in romances and myths, the kind that truly tears at the soul in its passion, is a one in a million thing. The odds just have never been in my favor. That made me very sad as a little girl. But then, I saw my mother perform an adaptation of Romeo and Juliet on a small stage in Venice. She's an opera singer and she played Juliet. I remember watching my mother sing of undying passion and sacrifice and I remember thinking that that's what I wanted and if only I had that for a moment, I would be a happy woman. And by the applause of the crowd, I knew that everyone there was thinking about the same thing. I met with my mother after curtain call and I told her what I thought, what I felt. She looked at me and said that I had missed the entire meaning of the story. I asked her to explain. She quoted to me the ending.' Celina took a sip of the juice before resting the cup in her hands and turning to face Neroon. "A glooming peace this morning with it brings; the sun for sorrow will not show his head. Go hence, to have more talk of these sad things; some shall be pardon'd, and some punished; for never was a story of more woe than this of Juliet and her Romeo." She had spoken slowly and pronounced very clearly in hopes that he would more easily follow the quotation. After a few moments, he looked back to her from his obvious concentration on the words. Perhaps, he hadn't followed every word, but he had understood the general sentiment. 'It is a tragedy. There was no happiness for the lovers. They were tortured to death. She bent down to better look me in the eye and she told me with disturbing intensity that it was alright to love something but that I should pray that I never truly fall in love with someone . . . It always ends bad.'

Neroon seemed to consider this for a long moment before he held out a hand to her. She was confused until his eyes fell to the cup in her hands. Celina held it out to him and he took it.

'You haven't been reading the right stories,' he told her before raising the cup to his lips. Neroon drank while watching her over the rim of the cup.

'The writer of that story, Shakespeare, is considered to be one of the greatest artists of all time, I have you know,' she told him.

'He was still an Earther,' Neroon pointed out as if that explained a lacking on Shakespeare's part, before placing the cup back on the table.

'That man wrote plays that are still performed nearly a thousand years after he wrote them. You have to admit that is quite impressive.'

'Yes, it is,' he agreed. 'However, a thousand years ago, the Minbari were traveling amongst the stars.'

'Yes, you can travel the stars but you are terrible at strip poker,' Celina teased.

'The game is not yet over,' Neroon said with seriousness, that was only slightly tinged in humor.

'Oh, so all the time you were losing you were just lulling me into a false sense of security?'

He thought about this for only a moment before looking to her askance. 'Do you feel secure?'

'In the fact that I'm about to strip you naked,' she replied before thinking of the full connotations of that. But, Celina ignored it and tried to look sure in what she had just said.

'I believe my luck is about to change,' he said, before rising to walk over to where they had left the cards, clothes, and game. She closed her eyes for a moment at the dull pressure in her head. Strangely, Celina had started getting headaches even without sleeping now. While walking over to join Neroon and finish the game, she decided that she would go to Velnier and ask about the equivalent of tylenol. She hoped to God that the Minbari had such a thing.

'I have a feeling,' she said while taking her seat across from him. He was already shuffling the cards, 'that Lady Luck wants to see you naked as much as I do. My god, Neroon, who taught you that was how to shuffle cards? They're my only deck, don't kill them! That's it, you're going down!'

Neroon just laughed and dealt the cards.

-----

For several days, Celina seemed to feel much better than she had for several weeks. Spending a whole day with someone for company had strangely lifted her spirits. Neroon and she were developing a most curiously pleasant relationship, something that she hadn't dared hoped for. But now that it seemed to be a possibility, Celina was greatly thankful for the companionship. It was becoming dearer to her than she liked to admit to even herself.

Then she awoke early one morning, hearing Neroon move about the room putting on his uniform. At first, Celina thought it was his movement that had awoken her, but that seemed strange since that rarely happened. A moment later when she opened her eyes to what was otherwise gentle light, it seemed to pierce through her skull into her mind. She quickly moved to rise from the bed, feeling suddenly sick to her stomach, twisted herself in the blankets and landed hard on the floor. On her hands and knees, she focused on controlling the pain, which was quickly ebbing away. Celina finally moved back to sit on her calves and looked over to where she last saw Neroon.

He was watching her, his expression unreadable, in the middle of securing some form of undergarment around his waist. She forced herself to smile.

'I knew that was going to happen the first day I saw this thing,' she said, a little embarrassed at the thought of what she must have looked like in the fall.

'Anything broken?' he asked, moving to add a light undershirt.

'My pride,' she answered and Neroon appeared slightly amused but not really paying attention to their discussion anymore, involved as he was with thinking of his various duties that day.

After visiting the bathroom, Celina returned to bed just as Neroon was walking out the front door. She tried to fall asleep, but ended up fidgeting and turning for over an hour, the headache just enough to keep her uncomfortable. Finally she got dressed and headed to the infirmary, in a search for Tylenol. She just dearly hoped she could get away without Velnier attempting another thorough examination.

Inside the main infirmary, three Minbari in the lighter tunic, pants, and robe of healers were standing around a long table, discussing a computer console on the wall that was showing an image of what appeared to be some type of cellular material. She waited towards the front of the room, beside the door, for a couple minutes, unsure of how to exactly interrupt or even if it would be wise to do so. Finally, Celina cleared her throat and one of the healers looked up as if unsure if she had heard the sound. Clearing her throat again, the female healer looked over her shoulder and saw her. Instead of walking over to ask Celina about her reason for being there, the healer walked into an adjacent room. A short time later, she walked out with Velnier in her wake, taking off some type of filmy over garment. He disposed of it in a rubbish shoot before moving over to her and asking what was the illness or injury.

'Nothing big,' she told him. 'Just a headache. I was wondering if you had any type of minor pain relief. I normally wouldn't bother you about this. But it's been going on for a few weeks now and –'

'How many weeks?' he asked.

'Two, maybe three.'

'Daily?'

'Not, not really . . . well, I suppose sometimes. It actually stopped five or six days ago. Just after that ritual with Neroon. But today, I woke up and it felt like someone was tearing my head open. I actually fell out of the bed. Confused Neroon so much he actually asked if I was alright,' Celina explained, raising a hand unconsciously to her temple. 'So if you could give me a minor pain reliever, I'd really-'

'Follow me,' he said, trying to lead her into a familiar exam room off the main infirmary. She hesitated.

'What are you going to do?' she asked with uncertainty and a bit of dread. 'Why do we have to go in there?'

'I would like to perform a more,' then he said two words she had come to fear, 'thorough examination.'

"No, no way," she said, backing away and holding up her hands in front of her as if to keep him away. 'I don't mean to tell you your job, but headaches are normal for humans. We take a minor pain reliever like Tylenol and then we're good as new. No reason for a thorough examination. In fact, I'm feeling better already, so I think I'll just . . .' Celina motioned towards the door, but Velnier would have nothing of that. Somehow, he tricked her into the examination room before she even realized what had happened. Just like when she met him in the corridor.

With a promise of adequate pain relief once the tests were run, Celina let him draw a sample of blood. He labeled the vial then handed it over to another of the healers to run while he continued tests to discern any signs of neural distress or trauma. He shined a small light into her eyes, tested her reflexes, and memory. And of course, Velnier looked at her blood pressure, seemingly unable to help himself. The other healer came in for a moment and pulled him out of the room. He returned a moment later and asked her to describe the intensity of the headache and if there were any other symptoms that had appeared around the same time.

'I suppose I've been more tired lately than usual,' she said, just remembering that. 'Really tired sometimes. But I take a nap and I'm fine.'

He nodded his head once in understanding and began feeling her neck, explaining that he was looking for any swelling of her glands. The healer entered again and handed a read out to Velnier, not looking once in Celina's direction.

'We are going to take another sample,' he said and handed the read out back to the healer, who quickly exited the room. After drawing another vial, Velnier left the room to oversee its testing himself.

Celina was left sitting on the examination table wondering what was wrong with the first sample. There was nothing in the room to distract her mind and she quickly became bored. She laid back after what seemed like about twenty minutes and closed her eyes, finding herself tired again. That wasn't surprising since she had woken up much earlier that morning than was her custom. She didn't sleep, but she dozed lightly, quickly waking when hearing the door hiss open.

Swiftly sitting up, Celina cringed at the dull throb in her temple. When she saw Velnier and the look on his face, she cringed again. She had always felt somewhat more immediately comfortable with Velnier than she had any of the other Minbari, because he had a likeable personality and even more importantly, he had seemed to genuinely like people. But now, the look on his face was so foreign, so alien, that she wanted nothing more than to get around him and out that door. She might have done just that, had he not been standing in the way of her exit. Idly, Celina wondered if he did that purposefully.

'That bad?' she asked nervously and he frowned. Velnier walked towards her but paused before getting very close. He saw the counter to his side and placed the read out in his hand down, not quite hard enough to be a slam, but surely harder than was necessary. With that, she knew it was very bad.

-----

Thank you for reading. I would dearly appreciate it if you'd take a moment to make my day and leave me a note telling me what you thought of my story. If you leave an email to contact you by, I would like to thank you for reading and answer any questions you may wish to pose.

Please continue on to the next chapter . . .


	11. Chapter 11

**Chapter Eleven**:

_"Notice the waves, each moving in its own order, predictable, unchanging. But drop in a single stone and see how the pattern changes. Everything around it is altered." _- Ambassador Delenn to Sinclair: "The Gathering"

-----

It turned out that Humans were unable to metabolize an alien compound in one of the vegetables she had been eating in the minced medley. At first, it was harmless, but as it collected in the system, it began becoming more dangerous, affecting the absorption of iron. She had slowly been becoming anemic, causing the headaches and tiredness. The fact that she nearly had a week of relief from the pain and fatigue was actually due to the crème that she had ritualistically eaten over the course of the day with Neroon. Some part of its chemical makeup had flushed a portion of the buildup of the alien compound in her system. And several of the other foods she had eaten since then were quite high in iron. That might have been enough for her to have recovered on her own, but she had began eating the vegetable again, unknowing that it was a problem for her system.

Velnier had hooked her up to liquids laced with some serum similar to the chemical in the crème, but much more potent, to flush the rest of the compound from her body. He gave her a mild pain reliever.

Then, he told her something that she couldn't remember actually hearing, but was unable to forget. By protocol, a daily account of those seen, their ailments, and treatments in the infirmary would be sent to the Alyt, who would inform the Shai'Alyt of any of particular importance. She was quite glad that she would play no part in that conversation.

Idly, Celina wondered if Neroon would confront her before discussing her condition with the Shai'Alyt. She had no particular interest in one over the other. It was going to happen anyway; the anger, the tears, the accusations, the shattering. It shared on all parts. Except for the tears. She was sure that those were going to be hers alone, unsure if Minbari even cried, but sure that Neroon would not.

Sitting for an indeterminable amount of time, she placed herself in the chair beside the couch, facing the door. Waiting. She knew she was angry somewhere inside herself. There was no one she could think of that she wasn't angry at. Running the gamut from her grandmother, for not locking her up and refusing to let her do this, to the Gray Council, for putting her here. The worst part was that she couldn't make herself hate any of them, because they had all been doing what they had thought to be the right thing. But the right thing in a bad situation was rarely a good or easy thing for those involved.

Mostly, Celina was angry at her sadness. She knew that any relationship that she had been developing with Neroon was going to shatter. Especially when she told him that she was going to refuse to take the only way out. If only she knew the right words, to make him understand, perhaps it would be alright. He should have been capable of understanding the pitfalls of difficult situations and even more difficult decisions, having made his share. But neither of them would be in the state of mind to discuss such things rationally; the emotions that needed to be spoken of, running too high.

She expected him to be cold. Yes, that would be his way. He would not come out and say anything of his emotions. Neroon would show up long enough to make her feel like dirt, perhaps snarl in her direction, then leave. Celina thought herself ready for that.

When the moment arrived and the door opened, she couldn't bring herself to look. Sitting for long moments, listening to her slowly breathing in and out, she heard Neroon walk inside. He paused a moment, before striding over to her and slamming, _slamming_ a read out on the coffee table in front of her. Celina couldn't help herself but jump in her seat.

She looked at it sitting on the table a moment before reaching out and picking it up. Glancing over the alien script, she focused on the entry about her. He was waiting for her to say something, to implicate herself in denials or confessions, standing too close over her. She couldn't breathe, so she quickly stood, finally looking at him. The coldness there burned. Quickly, she brushed past him to escape, to give herself some distance to think and to breathe. Yager had nearly strangled her in his frustrations and anger of Neroon, now it seemed that Neroon was strangling her in his frustrations and anger of her, without even lifting a hand. She stood in front of the small table beside the entrance into their bedroom. A beautiful glass vase rested there, different colors swirling around and embracing each other but never blending to become what they were not, staying true to what they were. Red. Blue. Gold. It was strange to see something so fragile on a war ship. And beside it, was the extinguished candle. She could still smell the fire in her memory.

'At our first meeting,' he said and she focused on the candle, you spoke of your intent to keep your promises. You promised fidelity. You promised to honor me.

'Honor?' she asked, it coming out a bit strangled.

'Yes, but instead you visit dishonor upon me. At your first opportunity, your promises, your word, your intent mean nothing. You are a creature without morals or principle. You are faithless.' He spoke so bitterly in his accusations that she finally looked to him. 'You speak of respect between us. How can I respect a creature such as you? You appear singularly intent upon public defamation of me and what I represent. Is that your intent, to publicly insult and embarrass my people?'

'No,' Celina replied quickly. 'That's never been what I wanted.'

'Then this is you,' he said simply, with a bit of a snarl on his face.

'This is me trying to do what my conscience tells me is right!' she said with the anger adding a bite to her tone. Her voice quickly rising, a stark contrast to his cool voice picking at her piece by piece in nearly even delivery. 'This was the only thing I could do! But everyone seems intent to punish me for it!'

'You prove yourself more whore than wife,' was his answer and white hot rage seemed to envelope her. She reached out for the vase and before she realized it had been in her hand, Neroon ducked and it shattered on the wall behind him. He looked behind himself while slowly standing straight again.

'I did it for _you_!' she nearly screamed and he turned to glare back at her sharply. 'This is your fault! You couldn't control yourself, so you put me in this position where I had no choice but to be torn apart in the middle! This wasn't about me; this all comes back to you. You couldn't control yourself with Yager. Dragging me and the Shai'Alyt into this, to cover your back. We had to put _our _honor on the line because of _you_. I did it for _you_, because _you_ asked it of me.' She held a hand against her chest at the last word and felt her heart thundering against her palm.

'I never asked-' he tried to say but she interrupted.

'Didn't you?' Celina threw back at him. 'What did you think you were doing telling me that you were worried about Yager? What did you think you were doing telling me that you didn't want the Shai'Alyt to take care of it? Who else did you think was left to take care of it then?'

'Sometimes, there is no greater intent behind such confessions than to just make them,' he replied sharply.

'So, you're telling me that you had no idea?' she laughed. 'When I told you that I'd take care of it, you didn't ask me what I meant. You didn't care! You didn't want to know! You wanted it all to be taken care of without any sacrifice on your part. You could have stopped me, Neroon. But no, you stayed in bed and pretended to be asleep. That night, I may have played the part of a whore. But you played the part of a coward.'

For a moment, he seemed about to go into a rage at her accusation. She knew how great of an insult that was to a warrior, but she had made it anyway, because it had been true.

'The worst part,' she said in a much more quiet voice and it held him back, forcing him to listen, 'is that though I am the one who continues to pay for it the most, everyone was dancing around me, making it about _you_. The Shai'Alyt was willing to do something drastic to protect you. You were willing for me to do something drastic to not only protect you, but also so that you didn't have to live with the guilt of dirtying Branmer's hands. And Yager . . . well, he was so passionate about you with frustration and anger that he just wanted to _do_ you. And all of you came to me, to do it. And you're _still_ doing it. You come in here, with that read out telling you the trouble I'm in, but all you can talk about, all you can think about, is how this will affect you! Velnier was the same way. He tells me I'm pregnant, but he doesn't think about how this is affecting me, all he thought about was how this would affect you. Is it so unforgivably selfish of me to want someone to think about me for a change?'

A silence fell between them and they just stood looking across the distance between them at each other. His eyes were so sharp, with intelligence and passion, that she had only to look to them and watch his inner battle over what she had said. He didn't want to hear any of that, didn't want to believe any of it. But it was so undeniably true. Neroon would much rather live with an unpleasant truth than a satisfying lie.

"My god, Neroon," she said, her eyes burning with containing tears, 'I am in so much trouble. There's nothing I can do and the only person that I might be able to turn to, is standing in front of me, calling me a whore.'

Again, an accusing silence, but this one seemed to fall more heavily on Neroon than on her. He kept his eyes locked on her while he turned slowly away. Only looking away when he turned his back on her. She was sure he was going to leave. And it hurt. But instead, he walked around the table and sat heavily on the couch, leaning forward and placing his elbows on his knees, resting his chin on a gloved fist.

'What will you have me do?' he asked, no anger in his voice, only resignation and perhaps some part compassion. Celina collected herself enough to walk over to sit back on the chair to his side. She thought a moment, her hands clasped in her lap, eyes downcast. Finally, she looked up to him.

'What _can_ you do?'

'I can give permission for termination,' he replied.

'I don't _need_ your permission for that,' she said and Neroon looked to her pointedly at that.

'Actually, you do,' he told her. 'It can only be performed if it is the expressed wish of both parents.'

'You aren't the parent,' Celina pointed out.

'By Minbari law, I am,' Neroon said. 'The child's parentage in a marriage is unassailable.'

'But the child is obviously human. It is physically impossible for you to be the father. Anyone will be able to look at the child and know that.'

'Yes, but no one will say so, not to us, not amongst themselves.' He paused before asking again. 'Do you want my permission for termination?'

'I thought Minbari didn't kill Minbari.'

'A fetus is not given a soul until after the ninth week of gestation. Only then is it Minbari. And only until then, is assisted termination possible. Do you want my permission?'

'Is that what you want?' she asked in reply.

'This is not a matter of what I want,' Neroon said. 'It is your turn to be selfish. What do you want, Celina?'

'The smart thing for me to do,' she said, leaning back in the chair and resting her hands unconsciously on her stomach, 'would be to terminate it.'

He inclined his head slightly, not so much nodding as a sign that he understood what she was saying.

'And I probably would if this were the first time. But it's not. I had an affair when I was fifteen with my friend's twenty-six year old cousin. It went on for months. I was stupid and I didn't want to go to the doctor and get birth control. I was afraid my mother would come across it and my family would find out. He said he'd take care of it. That didn't work. Four months into our relationship, I was pregnant. He said since it was his fault, he'd take care of it. So, one Monday I ditched my last class. I walked to a nearby candy store, where he met me. He brought me to a clinic, helped me fill out the forms, and held my hand as we waited for my turn. Afterwards, he took me to one of my favorite restaurants then let me pick out some clothes at a nice store. He said he was taking care of me. I thought I was fine with it. I thought I was happy even.' She smiled as if to emphasize her last statement. 'Several months later, I went to a baby shower at the base with my grandmother. The woman who it was being held for brought out pictures of her unborn baby that she had gotten from the doctor. I ended up locked in the bathroom for most of it, crying. I _can't_ do that again, Neroon.'

The Alyt inclined his head again and seemed to think for several long moments.

'Most likely, you will be sent back to Earth,' he said. 'Your pregnancy and child will not draw attention there.'

'I can't go back to Earth pregnant, Neroon,' Celina replied. He seemed to be slightly surprised to hear this from her. 'I'm not sure my child would be safe. If you think your government is not going to react well to this, it will not compare to how badly my government will take this. My very current state can be construed as an insult to the Minbari people. And since I represent Earth, they will feel that I am making a statement from them that they don't want to give. As soon as my government finds out about this, they will want it terminated. It can be done so against my will. Before the war, they probably wouldn't have tried it and they definitely wouldn't have gotten away with it. But now, since the war, they have been taking a lot of liberties to secure peace. And a lot of people back home are more than willing to give them those liberties because we can't take another war. Here, Earth Alliance can't touch me. If I'm sent back . . . it will be long months of waiting for someone to knock down my door and force a procedure on me. Please don't let them send me back there.'

Neroon sat back straight before reaching out and picking up the read out from the table top. She didn't remember even putting it back there. He stood and she stood as well, holding her hands clasped in front of her, twisting her fingers hard in anxiety.

'I will go to the Shai'Alyt and see what our options are,' he replied. 'If I am able, I will try to make sure you are not sent back to Earth.' She smiled. 'But, Celina, ultimately, I am powerless. If the Gray Council decides to send you back there is nothing I can do.' She couldn't help it, her smile turned into a frown and her brow drew together in worry. 'However, I may be able to convince Branmer in this. He holds a great deal of influence with the council. He is a respected figure amongst all the castes, especially the warrior and religious. If he were to speak on our behalf, he could sway them.'

Celina nodded her understanding and worried her lower lip between her teeth. He moved to the door.

'Neroon.'

He turned.

'Thank you. I am very lucky that you are my husband.'

Neroon paused as if considering saying something in return. Instead, he decided it better and perhaps easier to say nothing. The door closed behind him and Celina felt a heavy fatigue descend upon her. Deciding the oblivion of sleep was better than waiting, she laid out on the couch, still just slightly warm from where Neroon had sat, and left the rest to her Alyt.

-----

The Gray Council had kept them waiting for six days, an enforced limbo of uncertainty. Branmer had agreed to speak on Neroon's behalf to members of the council, but not actually appear before them. He did this because Neroon had asked it of him. Celina was sure he wouldn't have done so for her alone. Six days passed and the Gray Council had yet to have even broached the subject in their sacred chamber. When she asked how long it usually took them to come to decisions, Neroon had answered simply, The Gray Council works in a time of their own making.

That did not help to relieve her anxieties. Celina wasn't even sure she understood what that was supposed to _mean_.

She awoke to darkness, choking on an invisible fear and fighting against no one there. Covered in a slight cold sweat, the cotton of her chemise and pants stuck to her skin. The blanket was gone. It must have fallen to the floor. That happened whenever Neroon was not there to hold it up. A hand fell on her bare shoulder and she nearly jumped out of her skin.

'Neroon?' she asked in hope because if it were anyone but it would have had to be a bad thing.

'Yes.'

Celina sighed in relief. He withdrew his hand. 'What are you . . .?'

'Whatever was disturbing you refused to let me sleep.'

'Was I talking in my sleep?' The thought disturbed her with the possibility of him hearing something she would not otherwise tell.

'No.'

'Oh, good.'

'But you were kicking. Hard.'

'Oh . . . sorry.'

'You were also . . .' she could almost hear his pause, '_moaning_.'

'_Moaning_?' Celina felt embarrassment seep into her veins.

'_Moaning_.'

'Good moaning or bad moaning?'

He was silent for several seconds. 'What does your good moaning sound like?' he asked in puzzlement.

'Let's pretend like you didn't ask that,' she said, deciding to ignore what sounded like a bad pick-up line. 'It was a very . . . very bad dream. I'm sure it was bad moaning and let's leave it at that.'

Neroon returned to bed, throwing part of the lost blanket over her form and there was silence. Celina tried to stay very still and quiet, as if to make up for her earlier unconscious kicking and moaning. Every time that she thought of Neroon hearing her moaning, it caused her stomach to twist into a tight knot. Especially, when she considered what she had been dreaming about. It had been convoluted and definitely based in memory but had at some points taken disturbing turns from what happened.

She was in Mr. Yager's quarters, sitting on a chair and drinking coffee. Yager was taking pictures of her. It annoyed her but she let him anyways because he said nice things. There was a window behind him and outside was a park on the base where she had grown up. It was very bright out there and the trees were moving with a strong wind. But inside, she knew it was night. Neroon appeared out of no where behind Yager and told her to take off her clothes without her ever hearing his voice. Her mind reminded her that Yager was paying her to take nudes, so her clothes were gone. For a moment, she was scared that the children in the park would see her through the window. Yager told her it was a special window that she could see out but no one could see her. Then she was on the floor and the memory was vivid from reality. The floor was cold and hard. But she couldn't get up, so she just laid there and looked around. Rose was in the corner playing cards, facing the wall. Celina was looking up at Yager, his face too close to her own. He placed a hand over her throat and began to push. The dream mixed with her memory of panic. He set his head on her shoulder, easing the pressure on her throat and bit her. She was telling him to stop, again hearing it from memory. He lifted his head and smiled at her. She thought she was going to die. In a blink, it was Neroon moving over her. She didn't feel anything, so she knew it would be alright. He placed his hand on her throat. The texture of his glove against her skin was smooth and cold. He pressed down like Yager had, but quickly he pushed too hard. Neroon was giving the reluctant smile he used when she amused him against his will. She knew she was going to die. She was happy because she knew it was right. She had been dying for years. It was only right a Minbari killed her. It was tradition.

Now awake, Celina didn't want to even think of the possibility of her moaning. Or the strange fact that she had been comforted to hear Neroon's voice from the darkness on her waking. Perhaps, it had been because she hadn't ever heard it in her dreams, so it had to be real. His very presence reminded her that he would never do those things. In a very small way that disappointed her. That was very disturbing. Did she really want Neroon to kill her? No, she didn't think so. She didn't think it was that.

As quietly as she could, Celina slid out of bed, trying not to pull the blanket with her. The moment both her feet were placed on the floor, Neroon's voice insinuated itself in the darkness.

'Where are you going?' Apparently, he wasn't going to let her steal away into the night anymore without interrogating her first. Accusing him of feigning sleep instead of asking hard questions seemingly had had an affect on him. He wouldn't do it again.

'I can't sleep,' she answered. 'I'm just going to sit in the other room for a little while.'

He didn't answer and that was his brand of permission.

She moved out of the room and closed the doors between them. Slowly, cautiously, Celina walked to where she thought the chair was. It hit her in the knees about a foot before she was expecting it. Sitting, she left the lights off. Neroon wouldn't like to sleep with the lights on. For some reason, she just knew it. Celina felt amazingly alone sitting there. She could hardly stand the quiet. And she couldn't stand it at all alone.

'Neroon?'

There was a somewhat muffled sound from the other room that might have been an answer.

'I'm scared of the dark.'

He was silent for several moments and she wondered if he was actually asleep. Finally he answered, 'Is this a new development?'

'Yes,' she replied.

'Light the candle,' Neroon said as if thinking the matter closed.

'I am **not** lighting that candle.'

He was silent again. It was so hard to tell when he was sleeping and when he just wasn't letting her know he was awake. Especially when the Alyt was in the next room and it was nearly pitch black. Suddenly, Celina wished he snored just a little. She thought it would be comforting to have a reminder that he was close.

'Neroon?'

No response.

'Neroon?'

No response.

"Hey, soldier!"

'I must wonder,' Neroon said in a speculative voice, 'what travesties I committed against the universe in a past incarnation that made it say to itself, 'Yes . . . Neroon deserves her.' I hope that whatever these travesties were, they were greatly satisfying.'

'I know this sounds weird,' Celina said as if trying to brace him but was really trying to brace her self for the strangeness of what she was going to ask, 'but can you come sleep out here on the couch?'

His silence was quite loud in what he thought of that suggestion.

'I can't believe I'm saying this but . . . I think I'd feel safer if I knew you were right next to me.'

'Then come back to bed.'

'Neroon, I really don't want to be lying on my back for a while.' She considered whether it would be wise or not to continue the thought. 'Bad memories.'

'Minbari do not sleep on flat surfaces,' he replied and she smiled that it sounded like he was at least considering it.

'That's no problem,' Celina said quickly. 'Just bring both the pillows and put them on the armrest. You won't actually be sleeping flat then, will you? It's either that or I turn on all the lights.'

He gave a small disgruntled growl from the next room. A few moments later, she heard the doors slide open.

'Watch out for the,' Celina cringed as she heard something walk into a piece of furniture, 'table.'

The coffee table was slid across the floor and dumped a short distance away. She smiled as she heard him sit on the couch and pat down the pillows.

'You are rather manipulative.' From where his voice seemed to be coming from, Neroon was lying with his head on the couch armrest next to her chair. That made her feel better though she never would have asked him to be that close.

'I can't help myself. I don't mean to be,' she replied with an unseen smile, though knowing him he could probably hear it. 'I was made this way. And God said it was good.'

Celina just sat in silence for a few minutes, letting her mind run in nonsensical circles to tire her self out.

"It's strange," she said to herself. Neroon shifted slightly at the sound of her voice. 'The thing I miss most about being away from home is confession. I never would have guessed that. Maybe because I didn't feel like I had so much to confess when I was on the outpost. The biggest thing I felt I did wrong then was that I wasn't fighting in the war. That's why I started researching the Minbari. My dad didn't want me to. He said it would bring attention to me. He said I might as well have put a sign on my back that said, 'Minbari, come and get me.' My grandpa didn't agree. I lied to my dad and told him that I stopped. And my grandpa helped me. He was my contact. Every new bit of information I got about the Minbari I sent to him. But anyways, I was talking about confession. You probably don't realize what I'm talking about. It's a type of religious ritual. I go to a priest and confess my sins. He listens and afterwards tells me I am absolved and what prayers I must perform. My family always called it free therapy.' She laughed a little at the thought. 'I don't think there's any priest here. Other than Branmer, of course. But I am not going to try to confess anything to him. That would be just too weird. Not that this isn't weird. I'm just used to doing weird things with you. And it helps that I don't have to see your face while saying this. And I can act like you're asleep. You're asleep, right?'

He gave a small grunt that sounded a bit too purposeful to be an unconscious sound.

'That's what I thought. Hmm, let me think,' she replied, tapping her fingers on her armrest in thought. 'I think one of my biggest sins was that I pretended I was stupider than I actually am. Trying to make myself into a bigger victim than I am. Humans have a saying that goes something like, 'Men who forget history are doomed to repeat it.' Ironic, isn't it? That those who forget history usually forget that quote as well. Convenient.' She sighed. 'That's my sin that shames me the most, choosing convenient stupidity. I don't know if I would have done any differently. But I should have fessed up to the reality of what I was risking on all sides. In a way, what I accused you of was unfair. When I left our quarters, I had the full intention that I was going to convince Yager to think rationally. Or at least, that's what I let myself think.' Celina took a deep breath before continuing. 'I argued with him for about a half hour. That seems so pathetic. But at the time, it seemed like we were fighting forever. I might've put up a bigger fight but with every minute that I was away, there was more of a chance that someone might try to find me or Yager. And it wasn't like I had forever to convince him. I asked him at one point if he was just trying to get me pregnant. He laughed and said it was a good idea but he couldn't if he wanted to. He said after Rose he had a surgery. He didn't want any more paternity suits eating away at his business. He said it was a business transaction that he hadn't regretted once until that moment. I believed him. But I also knew that those surgeries aren't always perfect. And then there was the fact that my fertility cycle had been off since before I had arrived on the Ingata. It does that when I am under a lot of stress. I went almost a year without it on the outpost during the end of the war. Oh my god, I can't believe I just told you that.' She closed her eyes and raised a hand to her forehead.

'Neither can I,' he drawled.

She opened her eyes but couldn't see anything.

'Good thing you're asleep,' Celina said, hoping to make light of it.

'Quite convenient,' he replied.

'I didn't know you talked in your sleep, Neroon.' She smiled. 'Is this a new development?'

'Yes.'

'Any chance you will let slip some great Minbari secrets?'

'Even if I did, it would not be to your benefit,' he said and Celina leaned over on the armrest that was beside the one where Neroon's head was resting.

'Oh, why would that be?' she asked and she heard him move his head slightly away from her at hearing her so close. It might have been to merely look at where her voice was coming from.

'I would have to kill you soon after,' he explained in a low insinuating voice that belied the fierce statement.

'Neroon, you're such a tease,' she replied flippantly, a more calculated declaration than a casual observer would sense. Sighing, Celina let her head fall back onto the chair and closed her eyes. The relief that she always felt after confession seeped into her veins and she smiled at the comfort of their banter. 'We can go back to bed now, Neroon. And I promise no more kicking or moaning.'

'Or confessions?' he asked offhandedly.

'No, no more midnight confessions,' she assured him. 'Even though you are surprisingly docile at this time of night.'

'I am _never_ docile,' Neroon replied sternly.

'Sure.'

Celina heard him sit up and turn to look at her at her tone. 'Are you being sarcastic?' he questioned.

'Never.'

That made him pause for several moments. '_Very_ satisfying travesties . . . ' Neroon muttered while rising to return to bed.

'I feel loved,' Celina laughed while rising to join him.

'Now, I _know_ you are being sarcastic.'

-----

Thank you for reading. I would dearly appreciate it if you'd take a moment to make my day and leave me a note telling me what you thought of my story. If you leave an email to contact you by, I would like to thank you for reading and answer any questions you may wish to pose.

Please continue on to the next chapter . . .


	12. Chapter 12

**Chapter Twelve:**

_"The universe is run by the complex interweaving of three elements: energy, matter, and enlightened self-interest." _  
- G'Kar to Garibaldi: "Survivors"

-----

Two days later, her scheduled delivery of letters arrived as usual. One visual recording was from her mother (short, terse, and mainly discussing politics of the opera scene, but still with an ending of heartfelt concern for her daughter). Another was from her grandmother, covering from oddities in the news that she thought Celina would find amusing to discussing her mother's obsession with some shift in the opera scene. It was interesting to see the difference in the two women's views. The third visual was taken at her friend Diane's apartment. She and two of their mutual friends were there. Diane she had grown up with on the base and that was mainly what held their friendship together over the years of growing into different people. The other two, Jermaine and Alice, were also from military families but had come later so Celina had not known them so long. From the blaring music in the background at the beginning (Jermaine screamed after the first few seconds for Alice to turn it down) and the bottles in the background, there had been some heavy drinking before the three had decided to make a recording for her. Both Jermaine and Alice hadn't sent Celina any messages since she had left for the Ingata. Alice had said when she left that she would never talk to Celina again, her actions a betrayal to everyone who died in the war. She must have been terribly drunk to be sending her a message and by her erupting giggles and philosophical nonsense she was. When Alice started to cry about how the shattering of their relationship had hurt her more than she could ever say, Jermaine pulled her aside and started asking Celina questions about Minbari cuisine. This seemed normal for him, since he was a chef trying to turn gourmet with an exotic feel from alien influences. The man was a genius with spoo. But it seemed that Diane quickly became impatient with the others' nonsense and pushed both Jermaine and Alice aside into a giggling, poking, and swatting heap on the floor between the com and the couch. Diane seemed far less inebriated to Celina. She tried to sound conversational but she asked some questions that seemed to have a bit too much intent behind them. Diane asked about how much sleep the Minbari needed, how much they needed to eat, how smart their warriors tended to be. All of this was snuck into casual conversation, usually in the form of jokes. But these questions still set Celina on edge. They seemed a bit too strategic, especially to be coming from Diane. Someone in the ranks must have gotten to her to try to get information out of Celina. It had been a little more than a month since she had sent her preliminary report to Earth Alliance about what she had learned about the Minbari. Most of the report was simply stating a need for more time to observe. That undoubtedly rubbed the ranks the wrong way. So, she wasn't surprised when the last letter, a text missive, was from General Avery demanding a report with details. It seemed strange that they wouldn't even give Diane's tactic a chance to work but Celina put it out of her mind as unimportant.

Deciding that she didn't want to give Earth Alliance another reason to insist on her return to Earth, Celina gathered together her notes on what she had observed over her stay and began a more thorough report. The difficulty laid in the fact that she had to make it interesting enough to appease Earth but boring enough that the Minbari would let it through their filter. After three hours of compiling and rewording, Celina took her final rough draft and went to the Mess Hall to work out the details over a light dinner.

Returning over an hour and a half later with the final rough draft of the report finished, Celina was quite satisfied. Humming to herself, she walked into their quarters, called on the lights, turned on the remote console, and took off her shoes. Celina moved to sit down on the couch, scrutinizing a sentence that just refused to read right, when she heard something skitter.

She looked down at the console and wondered what that sound meant coming from a piece of Minbari technology. It couldn't be good, since it had never made that sound before. Tapping the screen lightly, she heard the skittering again. Snapping her head up, Celina was sure the sound originated from the next room.

'Neroon?' she called, though she was rather sure Neroon was incapable of skittering. Rising from the couch, she slowly moved to the entryway into the bedroom and peered within. Celina didn't see anyone or anything out of the ordinary but was absolutely sure that she had heard the sound come from this room. As the seconds ticked by, she became less sure with herself. Finally, she moved to return to the couch.

Immediately, she snapped her head back into the bedroom entry at the sound of close skittering. Curiosity overcoming common sense, Celina took a cautious three steps into the middle of the bedroom. Then she saw it. At first, shock and fear glued her feet to the floor. But as soon as it skittered toward her, she shrieked and ran straight out of the quarters and down the corridor.

'Celina?'

At the sound of Neroon's confused voice, she looked up from the report she had read over at least a dozen times in the last hour. She had to keep looking up as she was sitting on the floor outside their quarters with her back against the wall. He was standing tall with the Shai'Alyt to his side a short distance down the corridor. Both of them looked equally bewildered to see her sitting there, reading a report.

'Finally,' she grumbled to herself, shifting her derriere on the hard floor. Her legs were not the only body part beginning to go numb from the long sit.

'What do you think you are doing?' the Alyt asked. He and the Shai'Alyt were standing outside Branmer's quarters. Obviously that had been their original destination, to briefly discuss the day's important activities over tea before finally retiring. If Celina hadn't been aware of the almost father to son relationship between the two, she would have wondered exactly what they did in the daily debriefing. But at the moment, she was more concerned with matters of present.

'Did you acquire a pet today without telling me, Neroon?' she questioned and that seemed to come out of no where to him.

'No.'

The Shai'Alyt definitely seemed equal parts curious and amused now, forgetting his previous intent to retire. He looked between Neroon and her while they spoke, apparently wondering exactly where this would turn. Who knew when it involved a pair such as them?

'Alright, good, because otherwise, I'd still make you get rid of it,' she said, continuing to sit on the floor.

'What exactly is this . . . it?' he asked in a manner that definitely showed that he was not looking forward to her answer.

"Hmm," she thought to herself. 'I've been thinking about that. And I don't really know what to call it except . . . ,' she trailed off. "A creepy-crawly." Both Minbari looked like they had no idea what that was supposed to mean. 'It's as big as my hand,' Celina splayed out one hand in front of her in show, 'hairy and green. It skitters and I think . . . I'm not sure, but I think that it hissed at me before I ran out of the room.'

'It _hissed_ at you?' Branmer asked, obviously trying to put a mental image together of the creature.

'I think so! Like it was laughing!' she said. 'In its place I'd probably laugh too. I screamed and ran like a little girl.'

'It is in our quarters?' Neroon questioned and Celina nodded.

'In the bedroom,' she clarified. 'On the wall beside the bed.'

'You left it there unrestrained and have been waiting in the corridor for me to arrive?' By his tone of voice, he didn't think this was as brilliant an idea as Celina did.

'No, of course not,' she replied, using the wall as leverage to rise to her feet. 'I went looking for reinforcements, but I couldn't get anyone to take me seriously. I told the first Minbari I came across that there was a furry monster in my bedroom I needed her help with and she just gave me this look and walked away. I don't understand –' She paused mid-sentence as she caught the expressions on the other two Minbari's faces. Branmer was restraining amusement in a tight lipped I-Do-Not-Think-Like-That look while Neroon almost choked and was looking anywhere but at the Shai'Alyt. 'I get it now,' Celina said slowly with a smile. 'I suppose I don't blame her for ignoring me like that. Actually, I'm surprised she didn't hit me for that. But anyways, I went to another Minbari and tried to be more specific. I told him that there was a strange alien creature in my quarters hissing at me. He laughed and seemed to think I was joking about you, Neroon. I gave up after that and decided to wait it out here for someone to come ask why I was sitting in the corridor looking so pitiful.'

'Apparently very few people care how pitiful you look,' Neroon said and Celina frowned.

'True,' she agreed. 'But now you have the wonderful chance to be a big, strong warrior and kill the monster in our bedroom. And I can stand out here and admire your prowess from a nice, safe distance.'

The Alyt frowned at this but Branmer smiled and walked past him and Celina to the door. 'Come, Neroon, let's see what monster has caused your wife to flee from your bedroom in terror.' Both Minbari disappeared into her quarters, with Branmer laughing and the Alyt more cautious in the approach. The door closed behind them. Apparently, they didn't want to give the creature an avenue of escape.

A couple minutes later, the door opened and Branmer hurried out as quickly as his pride would allow before slapping the control panel to close the door.

'Bird spider,' he muttered to himself, stepping away from the entrance. Branmer saw Celina looking to him and he motioned to the door and added, 'It's best to let Neroon take care of it.'

Celina just nodded her head sagely before asking, 'Bird spider?'

'Bird spider,' he replied seriously.

'It can't fly, can it?'

'What a horrifying thought,' Branmer said. 'No. No, it doesn't fly.'

'Good.'

'But it jumps,' he added almost as an afterthought.

'_Jumps_?' she squeaked.

'Yes,' he said, 'anywhere from six to eight feet in one leap.'

'Is it poisonous?' Celina asked, wondering how much danger she had been in. To imagine if it had jumped at her and bit her!

'To birds,' Branmer replied.

'Minbari?'

He shook his heads with a, 'No.'

'Humans?'

"Hmm," the Shai'Alyt thought to himself. 'That is an interesting idea. I don't believe Bird Spider venom has ever been tested on Humans.'

"Then I guess we'll never know," she said in English to remind him that she was Human, in case he needed a reminder. From his look, he didn't. She ignored it. "Neroon's been in there for a while. Do you think we should –" The door opening cut off her thought. 'Neroon, is it dead?'

'Of course,' he replied, standing in the doorway leaning on his fighting pike.

'You were in there a long time,' Celina said without malice.

Neroon frowned and looked at the Shai'Alyt. 'It jumped at me,' Branmer defended himself from the accusation in that look.

'By the manner in which _you_ jumped, it must have thought you a distant cousin,' Neroon replied with a completely straight face, walking out of the quarters and closing the door behind him.

'It was a strategic retreat!' Branmer retorted.

'You ran from a spider?' Celina asked with a silly grin before she thought better of it. Neroon didn't hide his smile when the Shai'Alyt turned a pointed look on her. 'I suppose I'm not one to talk, am I? That was one scary spider.' She cleared her throat before looking to Neroon. 'Where'd it come from?'

'We received a shipment of supplies from Minbar four days ago. It must have stowed away with the supplies.' Neroon looked at the Shai'Alyt. 'Do you agree?'

'Yes, that is the only feasible answer,' Branmer replied, more than willing to leave the discussion of his strategic retreat behind.

'How did it get from the supplies to our quarters without being seen? That's a big spider!' She shivered at the thought of it skittering down the corridors.

'It must have bypassed the cleansing and circulation system and moved through the air ducts,' the Shai'Alyt said and Neroon nodded.

'I will contact the supply port and file a complaint with their measures for pest control,' he replied, twisting his hand and causing his pike to collapse with a metallic whoosh.

'Neroon, the last time you filed a complaint with our supply port,' Branmer reminded him, 'our next shipment was a week late. We cannot expect them to be perfect. And it was only one spider.'

'Unless it laid eggs in an air duct,' Neroon pointed out and Celina's blood ran cold at the thought. 'This is how ship wide pest problems begin. With one stow away.'

'Yes,' Branmer agreed, 'you do not need to remind me. Then we are lucky that even if that unfortunate spider did lay a brood, they will quickly die as there are no birds for them to feed upon inside the Ingata.'

'This particular spider can go weeks without eating,' Neroon replied. 'Even though what you say is true, we may have young bird spiders skittering in our air ducts for weeks before they expire.'

'Yes,' the Shai'Alyt agreed again and smiled, 'but eventually they _will_ expire.'

'And if they eat each other,' Neroon continued, 'a few may carry on even longer. Then there is the matter of their corpses decaying in our air ducts.'

'Fine, Neroon,' Branmer said, raising a hand momentarily to his forehead as if in pain, 'file your complaint with our supply port. However, if our next shipment is late, you will find another means for us to feed our crew.'

'Yes, Shai'Alyt,' he replied like a proper warrior.

'Good,' Branmer continued while moving to his quarters, 'and run a cleaner through the air ducts.'

'Ship wide?' Neroon asked though he seemed to already know the answer.

'Yes.' The Shai'Alyt pressed the control panel at his quarters and the door slid open. 'That should only take . . . two or three days. Start that tomorrow. I doubt any stowaways are going anywhere. Tonight, file your complaint and research possible supply sources available to us around the time of our next scheduled rendezvous. I have a feeling it will be regretfully delayed. Now I will retire.' He nodded as Neroon properly saluted him and Celina gave a small but respectful bow. The door closed behind him and she turned to Neroon with a sigh.

'Your supply line would really delay your shipments like that?' she asked.

'Worker caste,' Neroon replied conversationally, 'Quiet bunch but wound their pride and you _will_ go to bed hungry.'

He touched the control panel and the door slid open. Celina waited for him to enter but Neroon motioned for her to enter first. She looked at him suspiciously.

'I have not eaten,' he explained. 'Since I killed the pest, I believe it is just right that you dispose of what's left of it. And put the few pieces of furniture back in their place.'

'Well, I suppose that makes sense,' Celina agreed, turning into the quarters and stopping in surprise at the state of the room. 'Neroon! did you take on a spider or an invading army? Neroon?' She looked back to find him gone. Celina searched the corridor in time to see him enter a lift. She tried to send him a stern glare before the lift door closed but he only smirked. Sighing, Celina turned back to the disaster zone, the report forgotten in her hand.

-----

'Alright, stay with me on this,' she told Neroon the next day. His arms were crossed over his chest and he seemed torn on exactly what he thought of Celina's endeavors of the day. 'You know that I wasn't able to catch a wink of sleep last night. And when I don't get any sleep, you don't get any sleep. And when you don't get sleep, you get grumpy. And when you get grumpy, everyone suffers. So, for everyone's sake, I decided to do something about the air vents in our quarters.'

Neroon looked down at the air vent on the floor that they were standing in front of. Normally, the grid was fashioned to camouflage into the rest of the floor but at the moment a sheer black netting was placed over the grid with the edges tucked neatly in the small space between the grid face and the floor. Celina thought it was ingenious but she had no idea whether Neroon would agree.

'Where did you get this material?' he asked and she believed it a good sign that he wasn't arguing over the merit of the change.

'My underwear drawer,' she answered. Neroon looked to her in bemusement. 'It's a type of garment. Earth women wear it on their legs when they are wearing skirts that would otherwise show improper amount of skin. It was the only thing I could scavenge. Most of the day was actually spent trying to get someone to give me something to cut with. Finally I ended up with these,' Celina held up the pair of scissors in her hand with blunt tips. 'Safety scissors. But they served their purpose. I cut apart the stockings and with three pairs, I was able to cover every air duct in our quarters. Very inventive, if I do say so myself. And at first glance, no one will notice that they are covered. But most importantly, our quarters are now spider-proof.'

Neroon withheld comment until he moved around their quarters looking at every air duct in tight-lipped scrutiny, placing his hand over the grid to gauge the level of air flow. He disappeared into the bathroom. Those were the ones she was particularly proud of, since the bathroom air ducts were in hard to reach places. The Alyt returned a couple minutes later, muttered an, 'Acceptable,' and began changing out of his uniform. Celina smiled and clapped her hands together once in delight. No more creepy-crawlies!

-----

A week later, she was sitting on the familiar examination table wearing the flimsy patient gown. She was cold and nervous. The last time she had come to the infirmary, a strange healer had drew her blood to determine the level of the alien compound in her body. They had determined that there was still too much and that the soonest they could flush her system again would be about nine days later. So, here she was, nine days later, sitting and waiting for the healer to come in to hook her up to the fluids.

To her surprise, Velnier entered with the tray of delicate equipment.

"Oh my god, Velnier!" she said in astonishment before thinking about it.

The Minbari healer looked up at her before setting the tray down on the counter to the side of the examination table. He began to put together various pieces of instruments.

'Don't tell me you're going to give me the silent treatment,' Celina said and he looked over his shoulder at her momentarily before returning his eyes to the delicate procedure of setting up the fluid versus enzyme ratio.

'That is not part of your treatments for the day,' he replied offhandedly and she smiled. 'I will run these fluids and enzyme through your system, give you a simple vitamin combination approved for humans, then run a thorough examination of you and the fetus.'

'I was wondering, is flushing my system bad for the pregnancy?' she asked and he actually shrugged.

'I have no idea,' he told her and she just blinked for a few moments at the reply.

'How can you have no idea?'

'We have no data or documentation of a human pregnancy other than what we have gathered so far from you,' he explained.

'Earth Alliance knows I'm pregnant, right?' she asked and he nodded, focusing on hooking up the fluids to the stand beside the examination table. 'Then haven't they sent proper medical information?'

'We requested such information,' Velnier clarified, while motioning for her to lie back on the table. She did so without thought and he pulled her right arm aside to hook it up to the fluids. 'We were denied as they believed the information would not be needed.'

'Not needed!' Celina replied in a huff. 'How is it not needed?'

'They are under the impression that you are soon going to return to Earth,' he responded.

'So they're going to refuse to give needed medical information for my pregnancy until I return to Earth?' she asked, looking to Velnier wide-eyed.

'That is my understanding.'

"Fucking bastards!" Celina growled while throwing her free hand over her eyes. 'How can they do this, Velnier?' she asked while peeking out from between her fingers. 'According to Minbari law, they are endangering Neroon's child.'

Velnier looked to her sidelong in mild surprise that she was discussing Minbari law. 'They are refusing to acknowledge Neroon or Minbar's claim on the child. They are claiming you both as Earth Alliance citizens and thus are under their jurisdiction.'

'What does the Gray Council think about that?'

He paused before walking over to the counter and retrieving a vitamin injection. 'That I am not at liberty to discuss.'

'How do you know this anyway?' she questioned while he was giving her the injection.

'I was required to send testimony to the Gray Council on the possible ramifications on your health as well as that of Neroon's child should Earth continue to deny us needed medical information,' he explained.

'When I agreed to this, I never would have believed that there would come a time where I would be hoping for the Gray Council to protect me from the Earth Alliance,' Celina said sardonically.

'Ironic, is it not?' he said in a ponderous tone, his hands resting on the table beside her. 'You do this to protect Earth Alliance from the Gray Council. Yet, by doing this, you require the Gray Council to protect you from the Earth Alliance so that you may continue to protect the Earth Alliance from the Gray Council.'

'So, it's true what they say,' she said to them both with a twisted smile and mocking tone. 'God's got a sick sense of humor.'

'Or, in the least, a very complicated one,' Velnier corrected.

'Somehow, I don't think I'm going to like his punch line,' Celina replied and the healer caught her eyes on that but seemed to think it best to not reply. Closing her eyes and focusing on the cool fluids running through her veins, she tried not to think of how satisfying it would be to see the Earth Alliance shoot themselves in the foot.

-----

Thank you for reading. I would dearly appreciate it if you'd take a moment to make my day and leave me a note telling me what you thought of my story. If you leave an email to contact you by, I would like to thank you for reading and answer any questions you may wish to pose.

Please continue on to the next chapter . . .


	13. Chapter 13

**Chapter Thirteen:**

_"Now, I go to spread happiness to the rest of the station. It's a terrible responsibility but I have learned to live with it." _  
- Londo to Garibaldi: "A Voice in the Wilderness #1"

-----

Today, she would have had a party. It was family tradition. Since loved ones were spread throughout space, celebrating small victories and joys was a must. A birthday was both.

"A victory," her father had explained many times, "because an Amador has survived another year. And a joy, because there is still a promise of many others."

That was why on their birthdays, no matter where they were Amadors came home. To remind, who helped them survive that year and why the promise of more was a joy. Of course, this tradition went to hell with the Earth-Minbari War. But for the seventeen birthdays before that, Celina was always surrounded by family and there was always a party.

And there was always a surprise.

"Because what is the good of life, mi hija," her grandmother would say, "if not for the surprises?"

Carnivals, clowns, and shopping sprees. Yet, Celina found that she looked forward to the expected as much as the surprises. The smell of homemade tamales. Her mother and grandfather fighting in the kitchen between the merits of beef or chicken. Her grandmother hiding her mother's opera music and replacing it with Celina's newest and favorite popular music of the moment. And the sound of ceramic balls clinking together as her father played pool in the basement against anyone foolish enough to challenge him.

As her first birthday away from her family approached, she had bemoaned the loss of the tradition. She was surprised to find that amongst the handful of Centauri she had befriended on the station, one had been listening and cared. Lady Lorella, everyone called her, though she wasn't really a lady. She was actually the daughter of a well-to-do merchant family. But her brother had fawned on her and always called her lady, so everyone else followed suit. Most usually said it in a mocking tone but Celina pretended that she didn't know that Lorella was not a lady and though the Centauri woman was sure Celina knew better, she loved her for it.

Lady Lorella knew how to throw a party. She gathered together sword fighters, jugglers, and when she found out that that birthday was considered a sort of coming of age for the Human girl, she added exotic dancers. That had been an eye-opening experience for Celina since she had theretofore never seen a Centauri man naked, none the less move like _that_. In her mind, she compared it to a car crash, disturbing to a degree but oddly mesmerizing as well.

At the show of effort on the lady's part, Celina conveniently forgot to tell Lorella that she considered her true coming of age to have been her quinceañera.

These thoughts plagued her starting from the night before, where she realized the significance of the date when she checked the console to see exactly how many days had passed without the Gray Council making a decision. At first, Celina had disregarded it as lamentable but something mostly unimportant. But this morning, memories seemed to swim into her consciousness and refuse to be forgotten.

She and the Alyt were in the Sparring Room and Neroon was quickly becoming frustrated with her lack of attention. In the midst of their regular activity, her pondering all culminated into the thought that this year, her surprise had been that the tradition was completely broken.

The look of shock on Neroon's face when she burst into tears at him telling her to take position would have been comical if it were not for the fact that Celina was completely not in the mood to be amused.

'What-?' Neroon began before Celina interrupted.

"Don't look at me!" she cried in English because she was too suddenly upset to speak in Vik. Celina tried to hide her face with a hand, but knew that it was hopeless. Everyone had mostly come to a standstill, looking between her and Neroon, and wondering what the Alyt had done to reduce his Human wife to hysterics. Neroon appeared distinctly uncomfortable with his sudden circumstances.

Celina tried to explain but ended up rambling about not smelling tamales. From his look of confusion, Neroon did not believe he was translating her correctly. And perhaps he wasn't.

"It's tradition," she ended lamely with a hiccup then miserable sob. Celina sniffled and smeared the tears off her face somewhat ineffectively and pictured how pathetic she had to look. "Okay, I'm fine now," she said and went into starting position. Neroon followed suit and opened his mouth to say something. "No, I'm not!" Celina quickly corrected herself and stood hiding her face again as more pitiful tears came. She heard Neroon sigh and straighten.

A few moments later, she felt him unwrap her fingers from the staff she was leaning upon and pry it from her hands. He walked away without a word and Celina stood staring down on her feet, wiping the now silent tears from her face. She was embarrassed that she wasn't able to make them completely stop. And even more embarrassed that she choked every time she tried to smother a piteous hiccup.

In her mind, Celina attributed her over-emotionalism to her pregnancy, though she wasn't completely sure that was really to blame for much more than the stress that made her somewhat emotionally brittle. She glanced up when she felt Neroon return to the room. For some odd reason, she had slowly developed that ability from their time together. Now, she was reasonably sure when he was in a room or not. It was the level of static in the air, she reasoned but would never say aloud. And she almost always knew when he was looking at her. Perhaps because every time he did, there would be a moment where she'd have to swallow down the flight-or-fight instinct.

He nodded his chin minutely towards the door at catching her eyes before leaving the room. Neroon expected her to follow. And she did.

'Have you recovered yourself?' he asked tersely upon their arrival back into the relative solitude of their quarters.

She nodded her head, nervously pushing an errant strand of hair behind her ear. He seemed to be expecting a verbal answer, so she added, 'Yes, I think so. Sorry about that. I know it seemed to have come out of nowhere but there were actually many reasons behind that.'

'Not smelling tamales?' he asked, nearly warping the pronunciation of the last word beyond recognition.

"Tamales," she corrected, walking over to take a seat on the couch. "Wow, I feel tired," Celina said to her self.

'You have ten minutes to explain,' he told her, sitting on the chair beside the couch; her usual perch.

She wasn't sure she did her feelings justice, but explained the basics of what happened. 'It's tradition,' Celina ended lamely again. 'We don't hold ourselves to a lot of traditions. But the ones we do are important. And not easily broken. Though I've seemed to have broken a couple already. Starting with an Amador always marries in the church. I thought it'd be alright to break one tradition. Just one. Broke it in a big way, but it was still only one.'

'Traditions are only worthwhile until they begin to dominate us,' he replied. 'Until they turn us from what we are into what we were. They must be held in respect for their original purpose, but ultimately, like everything, they must die when it is no longer their time and be reincarnated if they are needed again. In between, they are only a nuisance.'

'Strange words to hear from a Minbari,' Celina said with a smile. 'I mean, you lot seem to be quite obsessed with tradition at times.'

To her surprise, Neroon rose to his feet and gave a crooked smile. 'Then it serves to reason, that I would know a great deal of what I speak.'

'Most of the time, you do,' she responded seriously. 'Duty calls?'

'And who among us is strong enough to ignore its siren song?' Neroon replied flippantly and it seemed to her that he was quoting someone or something.

'Valen?' Celina asked.

'Of course,' he answered before turning to leave the room. She bowed her head in thought, already thinking him gone. Then she felt it. He was looking at her. Celina looked up in time to catch him turning his gaze away and out the door. As always, Neroon followed his eyes and was soon lost to her. The door hissed closed between them.

-----

The Alyt didn't return as he usually did. Celina spent most the day in satisfying self-pity or anger directed inward at her self-pity. Finally, not able to stand herself as company any more, she went to bed and quickly fell asleep. But that seemed to last a moment before she was rudely shaken awake by her right shoulder.

"What? What? I'm up! I'm up!" she moaned, trying to pull away from her assailant's grip and hide underneath the blanket without sliding down the bed. The lights were on and she squinted up at Neroon. Her eyes were too traumatized by the sudden light to mark any expression.

He told her something about time being of the essence and she had to get up – now! Neroon made it sound like it was a matter of life or death, so she quickly regained nearly all her wits, despite her deep sleep. He shepherded her to the couch and she sat there dumbly as he arranged the console in front of her, hit a button, then stepped back quickly, as if burned.

A screen turned blue with the logo of the Minbari Federation. It was there only for a second before opening a channel.

"Mi hija!"

Celina blinked numbly at the image of her grandmother on the screen. She looked to Neroon, his face was unreadable, but he seemed right pleased with himself.

'Is this real time?' she asked, pointing at the screen.

"What is that, mi hija? I'm not sure how strong this connection is but I didn't catch what you just said," her grandmother's raspy voice rattled on.

She felt her jaw fall open but wasn't able to close it for the life of her. Now, Neroon was grinning.

'You have ten minutes,' he told her seriously, before disappearing into their bedroom.

"Celina, say something!" her grandmother said with a laugh. "You haven't forgotten how to speak, have you?"

"No, abuelita," she responded slowly. "I just . . . I'm so . . . .Oh, I'm so homesick!"

"Happy birthday, Celina," her grandmother said lovingly with a wrinkly smile and she couldn't help but grin back.

-----

Celina reluctantly closed the console, still unable to fully wipe the silly smile off her face. She bit her lower lip in hope that it would help. The doors separating the bedroom were closed. Neroon did that now when he took a shower. He still insisted there was no where to put his clothes in the bathroom and refused to set his clean clothes on the floor like Celina did. However, his compromise was that he would close the bedroom doors until he had fully dressed. To her, it felt like he was taking a tremendously long time to shower.

After she realized that thought with a heavy sigh, she was somewhat ashamed to hear the bathroom door open. He probably wasn't in there any longer than usual. Celina was just anxious. She listened to him open and close the closet door. A few moments later, the doors between the rooms opened.

Neroon raised his brow when he caught her eyes and the silly grin spread across her face again despite her will to the otherwise. He looked slightly uncomfortable, as if this was the part of his gift to her that he was not looking forward to; her overwhelming gratitude. Perhaps, he had taken longer in the bathroom than he usually did after all. Celina couldn't blame him. Neroon going so out of his way to do something for her without her asking him for it first was new territory. She wasn't quite sure how to thank him. Though both of them would probably be more comfortable with leaving it be, she had to let him know that she was thankful. He'd be resentful if she didn't. And she couldn't blame him for that either. Really, it was just a very uncomfortable situation that was better not thought about before throwing herself in the midst.

She stood and cleared her throat.

'My grandmother thinks you're falling in love with me.'

Celina had absolutely no idea that she was going to say that until it was out. Neroon blinked a couple times. Obviously, he hadn't expected that either. Quickly, a frown began to form.

'I don't think she believes herself. I know I don't,' she said quickly, walking around the coffee table. 'And she's old. Really old. It's not really our place to puncture an old lady's bubble of romanticism. You agree, right?' Celina knew she sounded a bit panicked towards the end, but she really didn't want to upset Neroon after he did such a nice thing for her. The guilt would make her miserable.

Neroon seemed not quite sure how to respond to that. 'I should not take offense because your grandmother is old?'

'Really old,' she replied.

'How old?'

'We're talking ancient,' Celina explained with a smile. Neroon appeared to be willing to ease the situation with humor, so she continued with a sigh. 'She must be nearly seventy now.'

Neroon laughed at that and Celina wasn't quite sure she got the joke.

'I am nearly sixty,' he clarified and she felt her eyes widen. 'Earth years, of course.'

"Oh my god, I'm one of those women," she said to herself.

'What women?'

"_Those_ women," Celina replied. 'Women who marry men old enough to be their grandfather. Know what that makes you?'

'What?' he asked, uncertain that he wished the answer.

Celina smiled slowly. "A cradle robber," she answered with relish. Neroon seemed to understand the general principal behind the idea.

'That does not apply to us,' he said. 'If you married a Minbari your age then you would be the "cradle robber."'

'So that's why the Minbari picked someone ancient like you to marry me?' Celina questioned.

'No.' Neroon smiled wickedly. 'Minbari simply do not condone child abuse.'

"Ha ha ha," she said with false lack of humor. 'Well, I suppose the last thing I need is to babysit my own husband. Even though I am sleeping with a Minbari old enough to be my grandfather!' He didn't seem to like her equating him with her grandfather, so she quickly changed tactics. 'Look, Neroon,' she began nervously. He didn't look to be willing to make it any easier on her. 'I have absolutely no idea what to say here that won't just sound trite. So . . .' She reached out towards him and took a step forward. He quickly took a step back, a slightly horrified expression on his face. "My god, Neroon!" she laughed, dropping her arms. 'I'm not going to kiss you! I just want to hug you. I promise it'll be quick and,' Celina smiled deviously, 'relatively painless.'

'I'd rather you not,' he replied darkly.

'What's the matter?' she teased. 'You don't like hugs?'

Neroon just looked at her sourly. That was one of the things she liked about him. He didn't throw about lies. If he didn't like what the truth would be, he remained silent. The Alyt always affected the air that he wouldn't bring himself down to her level, but it was still amusing most the time.

Celina took a careful step forward and Neroon didn't pull back, though he seemed to be trying to stare her down. Hesitantly, she touched his shoulder and he tried to hide a slight flinch in his body. Deciding it was best to get it over with quickly, Celina stepped forward and loosely closed her arms around his neck, barely letting her head rest against his shoulder and pressed herself against his bare chest. It was quite uncomfortable and Celina had the sudden urge to laugh. He was not making it any easier, standing completely stiff, with his arms to his side. 'Neroon, I _know_ you can do better than this,' she muttered against his shoulder. A few moments passed before she felt him sigh and place his hands on her hips.

In for a penny, in for a pound, apparently.

They stayed like that for perhaps three moments before Neroon used the placement of his hands to push her away from him slowly. Celina allowed him, letting her arms fall to her sides.

'Not so bad, was it?' she asked and he frowned. Celina wondered how long it would take him to realize he was still holding onto her hips and pull back.

About six seconds.

'You promised it'd be quick,' he said in an accusing tone.

'That _was_ quick!' she insisted, putting a hand over her heart as if quite put out that he was accusing her of deception. 'A good hug from me can last for _hours_, Neroon.'

'I cannot imagine anyone submitting themselves to that a moment longer,' he replied grumpily.

'Don't blame me if you push me away before I can get to the good part,' Celina retorted, not completely thinking about what she was saying. 'Next time, you'd do well, to relax and see where it goes. I swear, it's like trying to hug a pincushion!' she said, throwing up her hands, before pausing and adding, 'And I say that with affection for pincushions.'

The corner of his mouth twitched as if he was fighting a smile. Suddenly, Celina wondered if she had translated the word 'pincushion' correctly. Now, that she thought about it, what she said could also have been translated as a seat made out of needles. What an interesting simile . . .

'Bed,' he said simply, turning and walking towards, of all things, the bed.

'You should watch out, Neroon,' she replied, raising her hands to her hips, 'a girl could get confused with you making dangerous invitations like that.'

He called out the lights before sliding into bed. Celina was left standing just inside the bedroom. She knew she was going to stub her toe looking for the bed. She always stubbed her toe and he knew it.

"Bastard," she muttered a bit more affectionately than the name would warrant and knew that Neroon was smiling into the darkness. It was his way.

-----

The Alyt was muttering under his breath about worker caste with touchy egos again. He was working on the console. She thought it was rather cute when he started discreetly counting on his fingers. And it was of course always fun to watch him be frustrated with someone other than her for a change.

'Let me guess,' she said, putting a finger to her temple as if receiving a telepathic message, 'your next shipment is going to be regretfully delayed?'

He gave her a frown for her efforts at humor.

'So what are you going to do?' Celina asked, as if he had not just given her a death glare.

'Do you know of the Centauri colony Damiera 2?' Neroon questioned, typing into the console without looking at her.

'It's pretty much a small and elite vacation spot for Centauri in the neutral space between Centauri and Minbari space. Apparently has great Baths.'

He looked to her sidelong as if wondering how she was so familiar with the little colony.

'My friend, Lady Lorella, lives there with her brother Toli,' she explained.

'It also serves as a dock for supplies for passing ships,' he replied.

'Somehow I don't think they encourage just any ships passing through to raid their cabinets.'

'No, their prices are outrageous,' Neroon said, sitting up and stretching his back.

'But I bet their quality tends to be excellent,' she responded and he nodded reluctantly. 'It shouldn't be too much of a problem, should it? I mean, the Minbari lek holds a lot of weight against the Centauri ducat, currency wise. And if that doesn't work, you do have a huge war cruiser with hungry warriors on board. I'm sure that will work to your advantage somehow.'

'Yes, they usually cut their prices drastically when dealing with my people. A sign of respect, they say,' Neroon told her. 'However, they always present their prices too high before dragging us down planet side for long arguments of what constitutes respect and what constitutes thievery. The Centauri always seem to believe that if they have us on their ground for several days that they will be able to needle information out of us.'

Celina laughed. "Fat chance of that!"

'Luckily, they have stopped trying to sneak alcohol into our drinks.'

She chuckled a bit at that, but was quickly sobered by the thought of what a Minbari warrior could do in a homicidal rage. Thinking again on what he just said, Celina perked up and asked, 'Does that mean you will be going planet side'

'It will be necessary for the fiscal negotiation,' he replied, returning his attention to the screen in front of him.

'So you'll be on Damiera 2?'

'Yes.'

'Can I come with you?' she asked hopefully. He looked up at her for that. 'I could visit Lady Lorella! She always said that if I was anywhere near Damiera 2, I had to visit her. And if I didn't, she'd consider it a grievous insult. I know that if I send her a message saying I'm there, she'll demand I spend the day with her, at least,' she explained quickly.

'I will probably be there for several days in negotiation,' he said. 'It would be a waste of resources to shuttle back and forth between the Ingata and the colony needlessly. You could be stuck planet side for several days with nothing to do.'

'That's fine!' Celina said with a smile. 'I'm sure I can stay with Lady Lorella and her brother. She'll be ecstatic to hear that I'm there. In fact, you'll be lucky to get away without her shepherding you into her parlor. Think about it, Neroon, you can shoulder me off on someone else for a couple days.'

'Tempting,' he admitted, before turning back to the console and muttering, 'I will consider it.'

'Thank you, Neroon,' she said sweetly, before rising to go to bed for the night. If Celina were about to spend several days with Lady Lorella after their long separation, she'd need plenty of sleep beforehand.

-----

Thank you for reading. I would dearly appreciate it if you'd take a moment to make my day and leave me a note telling me what you thought of my story. If you leave an email to contact you by, I would like to thank you for reading and answer any questions you may wish to pose.

Please continue on to the next chapter . . .


	14. Chapter 14

**Chapter Fourteen:**

_"Sometimes the test is not to find the answer; it is to see how you react when you realize there is no answer." _  
- Dr Lazarenn: "Confessions and Lamentations"

-----

The main city in Damiera 2 was filled with short buildings (none taller than six stories high, to not obstruct the view of the horizon) made of white stone with golden roofs. Here were the attractions of those new to Damiera; the Baths, the bars, the most traveled beaches, with a few temples along the way. However, within three miles of this city, was the small village of Mier. Interestingly, it was the rich who were accustomed to staying in the colony and the year around residents who worked the shops and docks that lived here. The rich and poor of Damiera 2 mingled in Mier, walking the same beaches and eating at the same cafes. Both classes were comfortable with this, as there was no threat of social rising or falling between the two. They knew who and what they were and accepted it; the poor because they had no want for the inane trivialities bestowed upon the rich and the rich because they thought the poor obviously were too dumb to realize how miserable life was without wealth.

Lady Lorella and Toli's residence was, of course, in Mier. Celina now stood in front of the large building running along the length of the beach. It was not all theirs, as it was actually a collection of residences. The white stone walls were slightly yellowed from the years of wear from the sand carried upon the ocean wind. It gave it a golden sheen as the sun caught upon the sand embedded in the walls that matched wonderfully with the roofs. It was quite impressive.

Celina lifted the copper knocker on the old fashioned wood door and let it fall once.

'Only once,' Lorella had told her, years ago, with a laugh, 'because that's all any good servant needs to hear to know there is someone at the door. And if the house doesn't have such good servants, who would want to visit them anyway?'

The door opened and a Centauri man, impeccably dressed to reflect well on the house, but not so overly well groomed to seem to be approaching on a station he was not, ushered her in with a bow. Celina felt slightly self conscious about her yellow sundress around those that walked about in such regalia. Everything was so much more moneyed here than it had been on the outpost. She followed the servant down a corridor and into a parlor where she was immediately accosted by pink and gold silks, with a distinctly unladylike squeal.

Lorella pulled back from her strong embrace to grasp Celina's face between her hands and give her a chaste kiss. Celina was accustomed to the freedom young Centauri women bestowed their kisses with, so was not terribly surprised. Though it was somewhat jarring to go from the presence of the solemn Minbari not twenty minutes before to the exuberance of the Centauri woman's show of affection.

"Welcome to my home," Lorella said in heavily accented English. She was not very good at alien languages, but did try with the pleasantries. Celina smiled broadly and strategically switched to Centauri and felt her friend relax in relief at the change.

'It has been too long, Lady Lorella!'

The woman squealed and embraced her again.

'With such an obvious show of _glee_,' a bored voice remarked from across the room, 'people will begin to think I never let my lady sister out of the house.'

"Hello, Toli," Celina bid, pulling herself out of Lorella's embrace, though her friend seemed intent to keep a hand on her.

"Hello, Celina," he replied with a slight wave of the hand, eyes deep in some papers. Toli was much better with languages than his sister, which was probably for the best of his endeavors in trade.

'You've gained weight,' Lorella remarked, while leading her to a chair.

'I like it,' Toli added, studying her form over the edge of his papers. 'You were ghastly thin when I last saw you.'

'War and worry can do that to a woman,' Celina replied, dutifully taking her seat. Lorella hurried to pull a seat close and sit, reaching out and holding Celina's hand.

'Oh, yes,' Toli responded, as if just remembering something, 'we were, of course, quite pleased to hear the Minbari ended their campaign.'

'Ecstatic!' Lorella enthused, 'I even went to temple to give proper thanks.'

'You? In temple?' Celina asked in mock aghast. Toli smirked.

'Toli came with me,' the lady said as if tattling on him.

'The war was bad for business,' he muttered, returning his attention back to his papers. Lorella glared at him. 'Well, it was . . ,' he insisted.

'I love you, too, Toli,' she replied with a laugh.

'Why are you in Damiera 2?' Lorella asked, stealing back her friend's attention.

'My ship needs supplies,' Celina answered.

'Your ship? You aren't in that ghastly Earth Force now, are you? You're too good for that, Celina,' the lady said, squeezing her hand.

Deciding it best to broach the subject immediately, instead of avoiding it and having Lorella cry that she hurt her feelings once she found out, Celina said, 'I actually came on a . . . Minbari ship. War cruiser. It's called the Ingata.'

That was met with complete silence. Then Lorella began to smile and reached out and pushed Celina's shoulder.

'You jest!' she laughed.

'The Ingata?' Toli asked seriously, the papers forgotten in his lap.

'The Ingata.'

He seemed very confused. 'Why were you on the Ingata?'

'Toli! You can't believe her,' Lorella said with a smile.

'Lorella, a Minbari war cruiser, the Ingata, contacted us four days ago about supplies,' he replied. 'She couldn't have known about that unless she came with the Ingata.'

'Well, I still don't believe you,' she persisted before turning her attention back to Celina. '_Why_ would you be on a Minbari war cruiser?'

Celina took a deep breath before replying, 'What I'm about to tell you, I don't want you gossiping about with your friends. It hasn't hit the news feeds yet, from what I know. There might be rumors but no one can probably verify them yet, if anyone's even taking them seriously. If you say that I told you it's true, it could cause problems. So I'd be very thankful if both of you kept it safe. I know I can count on you both to be discreet.'

'Of course,' Toli said.

'I am the face of discretion,' Lorella added.

'I married a Minbari,' Celina admitted and Lorella looked to her sidelong, obviously trying to figure out whether this was a big joke or not.

'By the gods,' Toli whispered, 'you're serious, aren't you?'

'No, she's not,' Lorella insisted, almost frantically. 'Celina, say you're only playing with me. Please be only playing with me.'

'He's a warrior,' Celina began to explain. Toli groaned and Lorella actually went deathly pale, her hands holding Celina's like a vice. 'An Alyt. It was all planned between the Gray Council and Earth Alliance, though it was the Minbari's idea. A friend of my grandfather, General Avery, approached me about it a couple months before the fact and I accepted . . . of my own free will.' She paused, not quite sure what to add, because the other two obviously expected her to say more. 'It's a great opportunity! I get to study the Minbari in their own environment and help secure peace. It's nice to be part of the big picture,' Celina added weakly.

There were several moments of deafening silence. Lorella looked to Toli, obviously at a loss for what to say.

'Well,' Toli cleared his throat and returned to his papers, 'I hope that works out well for you.'

'Drink!' Lorella choked out.

'Brilliant idea,' her brother agreed, motioning towards a side cabinet. 'The good brevare. We should celebrate.'

'Right,' Lorella replied, rising to attend to the drinks. 'Celebrate.'

'I don't mean it as an insult, but I shouldn't drink,' Celina said, with a small bit of anxiety over them perhaps pursuing the subject. She hoped they wouldn't.

'Why shouldn't you?' the lady asked, pouring drinks. 'Are the Minbari insisting you commit to their sobriety?'

'It's not that,' she replied vaguely.

'Then I won't take no for an answer,' Lorella insisted, holding the rim of the third goblet steady and beginning to pour its share of brevare.

'I have to insist, Lorella,' Celina said resolutely. 'It's bad for the baby.'

The lady knocked over the goblet and spilt a bit of brevare before righting the bottle. Toli tossed his papers aside as if quite sure it was no use trying to commit any thought to them now.

'By the gods, Celina, what have you been doing with that Minbari?' The question seemed to emanate from them both, though it was actually Lorella that said it.

-----

The next day the perfume in the small store was making her feel sick to the stomach. Meanwhile, Lorella was buzzing around blithely throwing garments into the hands of a servant. As soon as the lady had learned that Celina was running low on clothes that fit her correctly, since she had gained weight, Lorella had taken it as an opportunity to provide her with 'proper clothing.' Meaning Centauri clothing. Celina didn't even want to think about what other people would think about that. Neroon's Human wife in Centauri clothing.

Oh, the sheer bizarreness!

'Remember that I still want people to know I'm Human, Lorella,' Celina reminded, walking behind the servant holding the growing pile of garments.

'Yes, yes, yes . . .' Lorella said, waving off the thought with a hand while pulling a leather corset out of the racks. 'Yes!' she whispered excitedly at her find.

'No!' Celina hastily replied.

'Why not?' she asked, genuinely not understanding what was wrong with the garment. 'Humans wear corsets. I know you wear corsets. You'd look _ravishing_ in this!'

'I am not wearing a _leather_ corset, Lorella.'

'Fine,' the lady replied, but in direct opposition to her words threw the corset on the pile of clothes for Celina to try on.

She knew it was useless to do much more than sigh. If Lorella had it in her mind, Celina would be returning to the Ingata with a leather corset.

'Shouldn't we look at clothing that I would be able to wear . . . a bit further on in my condition?' Celina asked, fingering a sheer material on a close rack.

'I suppose,' she muttered, obviously not looking forward to that selection. Lorella snapped her fingers once above her head and an attendant from the store immediately shuffled over. She explained in a huffy voice that they wanted to look at maternity gowns. The attendant nodded and was off without a word.

A minute later, the attendant returned with several garments. Lorella quickly shouldered them over to Celina, wanting nothing to do with them. As soon as Celina investigated them, she knew why.

'Lorella! This is a muumuu!'

'What's a muumuu?' she asked, not looking up from a rack she was fingering through.

Celina held up one of the voluminous gowns in front of her. She felt dwarfed behind it. 'This,' she said and Lorella looked over at the exacerbation, 'is a _muumuu_.'

'What else is an expecting woman to wear?'

'Not this!' Celina replied, throwing the gown back into the pile of others in her arms.

'Why not?' Lorella asked, with a tinge of humor to her voice that made Celina believe she knew quite well what problems she was having with the dresses.

'Lorella, if I wore this, Neroon would never take me seriously again.'

'I say again, what else will you wear?'

'Unless, he wants me walking around naked, I'm sure Neroon will provide me with proper clothing somehow,' Celina said.

'You're giving the choice of nudity to a man?' Lorella laughed. 'Cherished, you're going to get very cold.'

'Neroon doesn't think of me like that,' she responded in a hushed manner, handing the dresses back to the attendant, who took them away.

'Of course, he does.'

'No, he doesn't.'

Lorella turned and asked with a huff, 'So you are saying that there have been no moments of sexual tension, no lingering glances, no deepening of the voice?'

'Do you really think it safe to discuss this here?' Celina asked, flickering a glance to the Centauri servant holding the pile of garments.

'Oh, they won't say a thing here,' the lady assured. 'They're far too dependant on my business to be anything less than discreet.'

'I'd still rather nothing were caught on security camera,' she said, looking askance at the corners of the room, wondering where the recorders were hidden.

'There are no security cameras.' Lady Lorella continued at catching Celina's skeptical glance. 'Wealthy Centauri are very touchy about being surreptitiously recorded. We insist on extremely harsh penalties to any crime in the colony, so there practically is none. Consequently, there is no reason for security cameras. In fact, it's actually a crime to capture anyone on a hidden recording on Damiera 2.'

'I suppose that makes me feel a little better . . .'

'You haven't answered my question,' Lorella brought up again as she was sitting in the dressing room with Celina, who was hooking together a particularly intricate corset. They had come to the conclusion of not including any that required a partner to assist her into it. Except for a couple that the lady insisted were too good to not buy.

'Well . . .' Celina drew the word out. 'I can't be certain that the sexual tension I feel isn't just me.'

'But . . .' Lorella prompted.

'But . . . there's definitely been . . . glances . . . lingering glances.'

'And his voice? Has he made husky utterances that make a chill run up your spine? You're a woman, so you should know what I'm talking about,' the lady said, swallowing a lascivious smile into a smirk.

'I can't tell if he's trying to be sexy, or if he's just trying to be scary,' Celina said, turning and looking in the mirror. She frowned and looked to Lorella for her advice. The lady frowned and shook her head. Celina was glad this corset was a no; it was hell to get on. And it was far too easy to get off.

'To a warrior I think that's the same thing,' she replied, taking the corset from Celina and tossing it over the door to the attendant outside the room.

'And if it's not?' Celina asked, trying on the leather corset she had fought so valiantly against. It was the last piece of clothing they had brought with them to try on. There was surprisingly little that both the women had deemed acceptable. She felt that she was to be shepherded through the store again in search of yet more to try on. Celina found that she didn't mind at all. It was rather nice to have something to do in a new place with friendly company. 'I mean neither of us has much experience with Minbari. What if sex with me has never even occurred to him? Seriously I mean, because we have joked about it.'

'Always bet on sex, Celina,' Lorella advised. 'Most of the time, you'll be right.'

'And the rest of the time?'

'Well, most of the rest of the time, the man will think it a lovely suggestion and you'll both wonder why he didn't think of it himself,' she said with a smile.

'And the small part of the time you aren't talking about?'

'I've never met any man that fell into that part of the time, but I've heard that it has happened on occasion,' the lady replied. 'I know that because of the seclusion that the Minbari have tended to conduct their private lives with, the general attitude towards them is sexless. But you know as well as I do, that public perceptions can be deceiving. I tend to focus my attention more on two qualities of a species to determine the level of their passions, both sexual and otherwise.'

'What two qualities?' Celina asked, intrigued. Despite herself, she actually thought she looked rather nice in the leather corset. But ravishing?

'The intensity with which they wage war and the intensity with which they pray.'

'Alright, explain.'

Lorella smiled. 'I was about to, cherished. And yes, you do look ravishing in that. However, I have found in my interactions with the supposedly sentient beings of the known galaxy that sex, war, and religion all stem from the same source of passion within a person and the last two are quite often connected in some way to the first one. Sex gives us a reason to fight and it's only in sex that we realize the divine.' Celina couldn't help but laugh at that thought, though it did seem to make sense on some level. 'Thus, it serves to reason that the Minbari must be a passionate people. And I've found that you are very good at sensing the intent beyond cultural miscommunication. It's what makes you good at what you do. If you think there is something there, there is something there.'

'Well, doesn't that make life all the more complicated?' Celina replied with a laugh, tossing the corset aside and putting back on her shirt.

'And so much more appealing,' Lorella responded with a slow smile. The smile then vanished with a thought. 'What have you been sleeping in, Celina?'

'Oh, I don't need any night clothes,' she insisted. 'I have shirts that are big enough.'

Lorella rolled her eyes. 'It's no wonder you aren't having sex with your husband. You'd do better to sleep in the nude.'

'That's not going to happen. Neroon has only seen me naked once and it was because of a game.'

"Strip poker?" the lady guessed and Celina nodded. 'Come, Celina, we'll find you some appropriate delicates.'

Celina sighed, tossing the corset to the attendant once they walked out the door. It was useless to argue with Lorella when she was on a quest for lingerie. At least, she'd probably restock her supply of stockings.

-----

She sat on the floor with her back against the side of her bed. Her knees were drawn up to her chin and she was thinking. It was dark, but Celina had left the bathroom door open and the light from in there cut through the darkness in one warped shaft that ended just before her feet. She considered waking Lorella to talk, but decided against it. The decision was already made. It was best to not make more of a fuss of it than it had to be. There was likely nothing to be done now, anyway. Perhaps, earlier, when it had just started, but even then, it would have been unlikely to have helped. She had left it all to god, she decided. But still, Celina couldn't figure how she felt about it. She was becoming disconcertingly numb. And she stayed like that until morning.

-----

Celina thought she heard a deep murmur that sounded like it could have been Neroon's voice as she walked into Lorella's parlor. The lady was standing in front of a console on the desk hidden towards the back of the room behind curtains of sheer red fabric. The console was facing away from Celina, so she couldn't see who was on the line, though she had more than an idea.

'If you _want_ her so _badly_, come and fetch her yourself!' Lorella said with delight before disconnecting the line and looking up.

'Who-?' Celina said before being interrupted.

'I believe your darling husband will be here soon for you,' she replied, walking around the desk and out from behind the sheer curtains.

'Lady Lorella,' Celina began to chastise but Lorella would not hear for it.

'And you're right; he is rather sexy when he's trying to be scary. Unfortunately it's impossible for me to be scared over a comm link. But I'm sure I will be properly terrified when he arrives. He did seem quite charmingly annoyed with me.'

'Lorella,' she whined, raising a hand to her face at the slight pain of thinking of an annoyed Minbari warrior marching to retrieve her, 'I really am not in the mood to deal with an angry Neroon. I hate it when he's angry with me.'

'Not to worry,' Lorella said, putting a hand on her arm. 'I told Neroon that you were quite my prisoner.'

'You cannot play with Neroon like you do with everyone else,' Celina told her.

Lorella pouted and seemed to think on this. 'Why ever not?'

'Because he can _kill_ you,' Celina explained slowly.

'Oh, that!' the lady laughed, while swatting the thought aside with a hand and walking to the other side of the room. She pressed a hidden button to summon a servant. A moment later, a man walked into the room. 'A Minbari man will be arriving momentarily. Bring him here. And, once you do, if you should hear screams,' Lorella smiled, 'you may tell everyone that I was properly warned but couldn't help myself. A usual vice of mine; I'm sure everyone will believe it. Go now.' She turned to Celina and raised a brow with a look that obviously said, "well?"

'I'm going to miss you, Lorella,' she replied tiredly, moving to sit on the small couch in front of the window.

'Hmm,' the lady hummed to herself while tapping her finger to her lips in thought, looking about the room. Celina was slightly confused when she realized she was actually looking at the chairs in the room. Suddenly she smiled and called for more servants.

-----

Neroon did not look amused. Lorella did. Celina just hoped he'd believe she had no part in this. Both of them stood up when the Alyt strode into the dainty parlor. It was rather strange to see Neroon's rough, straight-lined, no-nonsense warrior routine alongside the red lace, gold and blue satins, and the supple cherry woods. Perhaps because she always imagined him backgrounded with the subtle and sometimes muted blues and grays of the Minbari war cruiser; definitely not red lace.

'Alyt Neroon!' Lorella purred and the Minbari was immediately on guard. 'You look even more ravishing in person.'

It seemed like he didn't know quite how to handle this; apparently having never been accosted by compliments before.

'If you tickle her she'll stop,' Celina told him. Neroon looked to her askance; obviously trying to figure whether the two women were coordinating some joke. 'I'm serious.'

'Oh, hush, Celina,' Lorella said quickly. 'Please have a seat, Alyt.'

'I will not be staying long enough for pleasantries,' he replied. 'Our transport is about to leave.'

'The transport will leave without you?'

'No'

'Then you can sit,' the lady said with a wide smile.

'I would rather we left now,' he replied in a short voice.

Lorella just blinked several times at him, as if not comprehending. Finally, she said in a tiny, flat voice, 'I understand, Alyt. You want to take my lovely, Human friend back on your ghastly and frightening war cruiser. You want to deny me the peace of mind that speaking for a few minutes with you would bring. I would know some of you, Neroon –May I call you Neroon?-. I would know you, Neroon, so that I would know that my friend . . . my good, dear friend, Celina, is with a good man. I believe you must be a good man, because she speaks so well of you and I would hope it to be so. But I would like to _know_ you are a good and honorable man who would sit in a parlor for three minutes and assuage a lady's worry and concern for this young woman's emotional well-being. I understand, Neroon, if you would rather tear her from my bosom. And I cannot stop you. Still . . . will you not sit?'

Neroon's eyes bored down on her for several moments before relenting and searching the room. It was only then he seemed to realize Lorella's trick. She had had all the seats from the parlor removed saved the one she claimed as her own and the couch Celina had been sitting on before. She wondered what Toli would think when he came home and found all the chairs from the parlor stacked just inside his study.

'I'm sorry; all the chairs are being cleaned and polished,' Lorella lied with a smile. 'But you can sit beside your wife.'

Celina was impressed that the lady had tricked Neroon into sitting thigh-to-thigh on the small couch with her in under two minutes of him walking into the room. Lorella seemed impressed with herself.

The lady opened her mouth but Celina raised her hand slightly.

'I'd like to interrupt here for a moment, if I may,' she said to Lorella before turning to Neroon. 'I would like you to know that I have absolutely nothing to do with whatever she's going to say. In fact, I've had nothing to do with any of this. I am a hapless victim here. So, there is no reason for you to hold whatever Lorella says against me. Now, that's said,' she turned back to Lorella, 'you may continue.'

'Thank you,' the lady replied, her eyes never leaving the Alyt. 'Neroon . . . where do you see yourself in five years?'

'Serving the Minbari people,' he replied and Celina was slightly surprised to hear him actually allow his self to be questioned by another. Though, she supposed that she shouldn't have been so surprised. He was used to being debriefed in a military setting, having all his actions liable to unflinching scrutiny. And he seemed to be approaching it in the same manner.

'And where's Celina?'

He smiled. 'Sitting next to me,' Neroon replied matter-of-factly. Obviously, he intended her to have to pry a satisfactory answer out of him to any question he didn't quite want to answer.

'How romantic, Neroon,' Lorella said sweetly, intentionally misconstruing the intent of his response. He pressed his lips into a thin line at the backfiring. 'What do you think of Celina's obsession with raunchy romance novels?'

'Lorella!' she squeaked in mortification. 'Take that back.'

'No.'

Celina turned to Neroon and said, 'I am not obsessed with romance novels. I have a few favorites that I like to read. For a laugh. I would not term them 'raunchy.''

'But they are,' Lorella insisted.

'They are not.'

'Hmm . . . let me see if I can remember a few titles. There was:' she paused and switched to English, "What's Your Pleasure, My Sexiest Mistake, the Measure of a Man. . . The Mating Game."

Celina hid her face in shame.

'I believe the last one had a Centauri man on the cover,' Lorella added.

'I was curious whether the author had done her research on the Centuari,' she defended herself weakly before looking up sharply at the lady. 'And how did you remember those titles after all these years?'

'I have an excellent memory for facts I can later use to torment others,' Lorella answered, fluttering her eyelashes.

'I thought you were interrogating Neroon here,' Celina reminded.

'Oh, yes. Neroon, you haven't answered me. What do you think of Celina's raunchy little secret?'

'Could we please drop the word raunchy?' she asked weakly. Lorella ignored her and looked to Neroon expectantly.

'I once told her that she was reading the wrong stories,' Neroon said and Celina caught him glancing to her sidelong with a smirk. 'However, I had no idea that she was reading that.'

'That's because she learned to tear the covers off so that others won't see the naughty pictures on the front,' Lorella replied.

'Oh, so now raunchy has become naughty? _So_ much better,' Celina could've been talking to the ceiling for all the good it did.

'Don't frown like that, cherished. It'll give you wrinkles,' the lady said offhandedly. 'And there's no reason to be ashamed. You're a very passionate woman. I'm sure Neroon appreciates that. Don't you appreciate her passion, Neroon?'

Celina felt like crawling between the cushions and dying of embarrassment. Apparently, Lorella was drawing Neroon out at Celina's expense. He did seem amused by her discomfort.

'Passion should always be appreciated,' he said. 'But, of course, it should also be properly directed.'

'And do you help her direct her passions?' Lorella asked and Celina felt it was over the line.

'I do not concern myself with her passions,' Neroon replied tightly, though she got the impression that he was playing with Lorella as much as she was playing with him.

'Perhaps you should,' Lorella said before quickly continuing onto, 'What do you do with _your_ passions, Neroon?'

'My passions _kill_,' he responded in a deep, promising tone. Lorella looked to Celina with a raised brow, recognizing the voice from their conversation the day before.

'I'm sure she could help direct your passions in less lethal pursuits. She is your wife. It is now part of who she is. A wife's duty is to expand a man's horizons, broaden his sights. And a husband should be his wife's horizon, be the only thing in her sight.'

'That may be the Centauri ideal,' Neroon said seriously, 'however, I do not subscribe to that ideal. And neither, I believe, would Celina.'

'Yes, it is a Centuari ideal,' Lorella allowed, equally serious, 'and the Centauri are known for our arranged marriages, rarely ever having to do with such fickle emotions like love. But both your people claim that as the guiding force for your peoples to choose their own partners. That choice was taken from you. Now, you are in an arranged marriage having had nothing to do with love. Neither of you were raised for this. But we Centauri are and this is the best way we have found to make it work, none the less bearable. I do not know and will not say how much of the troubles that I know have fallen upon you two could have been avoided with this. But I do know that many future troubles may be avoided by taking into consideration the advice of a Centauri woman that has experience in making an undesirable marriage somewhat . . . desirable.'

There was a deep moment of silence.

'We . . . have probably kept the transport waiting too long,' Celina finally said, rising to her feet alongside Neroon. Lorella stood as well.

'Yes, I suppose I've said enough,' the lady replied before throwing open her arms. Celina quickly walked into the little Centauri woman's embrace. 'It was an honor meeting you, Neroon.' He gave a slight nod. The lady pulled back and held her at arm's length. 'And do not stay away too long, Celina. I love you but I do like to be reminded every once in a while why.'

'Of course. I love you too. And tell Toli that I'm sorry I wasn't able to see him once more before leaving.'

Lorella grasped her face and kissed her chastely, obviously distressed at the parting. Both Celina and Neroon moved to the door, but turned momentarily at the sound of the lady's voice.

'Neroon, we did a bit of shopping over her stay. One of my servants will follow you with the bags. Don't worry, there aren't many and they're very small,' Lorella added at Neroon's displeased look. 'I bought her new night clothes. The only thanks I require from you is to incinerate her old ones. Oh, and please make sure she doesn't misuse her new stockings. It would be shameful. Farewell!' She gave a slight wave of her hand.

Celina shook her head and followed Neroon out the door.

-----

Thank you for reading. I would dearly appreciate it if you'd take a moment to make my day and leave me a note telling me what you thought of my story. If you leave an email to contact you by, I would like to thank you for reading and answer any questions you may wish to pose.

Please continue on to the next chapter . . .


	15. Chapter 15

**Chapter Fifteen:**

_"Minbari: pale, bloodless. Look in their eyes and see nothing but mirrors, infinities of reflection."_  
- Soul Hunter #1: "Soul Hunter"

-----

They were walking away from the home, the servant carrying Celina's bags a few steps behind them. Surprisingly, Neroon didn't seem to be in as much of a hurry as she had expected. But, of course, it was true that the transport would wait forever for them if they had to. He was walking at an easy pace for her to keep and was seemingly looking at nothing in the middle distance. Neroon tended to think very loudly, without a peep but his expression was always more than enough to know that he was trying to work something out. He didn't seem to like when his held beliefs were challenged but he did listen to reason and tried to keep his beliefs within such. Obviously, what Lorella had said was causing him some measure of thought.

The same thoughts had been going through Celina's head for the last few days, the lady having been drilling them into her nearly since her arrival. Lorella was not happy with the situation Celina had got herself into, but there was no way for her to get out of it. So the lady strived to instruct Celina how to make it better for herself. She was pleased to hear when Celina told her of Neroon's acts of kindness towards her, but she seemed particularly interested in the moments that Celina was confused with, the moments when there was affection and attraction. Lorella told her that it was in her best interest to pursue those feelings and moments. If she nurtured them, they would develop and it would only be to her and her people's betterment.

'If you find your husband's heart, Celina,' Lorella had whispered to her on the beach, 'then you can do some good and perhaps,' she pushed a strand of Celina's hair behind her ear, 'perhaps you'll find your own.'

Celina had laughed at that. Its romanticism a little too heady to be comfortable to her, especially paired with the thought of Neroon. Lorella had smiled sadly at that, her words and sentiment having been quite serious. She promised to think about it to make the lady happy. But now, she was quite distressed, because she actually had been giving it thought and now Neroon seemed to be giving it thought also. It took Celina less than a day before she admitted to herself that it made sense. It was a somewhat infectious thought. Duty had placed them together but there was no reason to not make the best of it.

She wondered if she _had_ been reading too many raunchy romance novels if she was considering becoming more intimate with an alien. Of course, what was Neroon's excuse? Celina glanced sidelong to the Alyt and wondered if he was thinking about what she thought he was thinking about. And if so, what was he thinking about it?

'How did the negotiation go, Neroon?' Celina asked, feeling strange with the switch to Vik after nearly three days of Centuari.

'They refused to listen to reason for two days, shepherding us around the colony to see the sights,' the Alyt replied as they turned on a side street with little shops.

'How did you finally convince them to be reasonable?'

'I might have mentioned that our war cruiser had three slicer beams, twenty fusion beam cannons, ten lighter fusion guns, forty-two Neutron/Particle beam mounts, and, of course, a missile launcher. Branmer favors the fusion cannons as he says they remind him of fireworks. I, however, favor the missile launcher. It gets my point across very well.'

'I'm surprised they caved just at the mention of your weapons array,' Celina said. 'Centuari businessmen can be brutal.'

'I might have also mentioned that my main gunner gets twitchy when underfed,' Neroon admitted and Celina laughed.

'A twitchy Minbari!' she said, having to come to a stop in front of an open café because of her giggles. 'What a disturbing thought!'

Neroon stopped as well.

'A twitchy main gunner is _always_ a disturbing thought,' he said, 'no matter the species.'

'Then why do you keep him as your gunner?' Celina asked, clasping her hands in front of her and smiling.

'He would not make it in hand to hand combat.'

'Why not?'

'Weak ankles,' Neroon admitted and she laughed at the thought. 'But he has an eye for tactical hits. And he is the only Minbari I've ever seen who seems to enjoy our protein substitute. He hides it away like pudding. Did you just snort?'

She nodded her head and threw a hand over her mouth and nose when her giggles threatened to turn into another snort. Celina had enjoyed her time with Lorella, but now she found that she had missed Neroon's dry humor. Lady Lorella was often over the top in her effort to please. Neroon simply was who he was and if someone didn't like that . . . well, screw them. She respected and enjoyed that and sensed that he appreciated it in return.

'How could anyone enjoy that protein poison?' she asked rhetorically.

'As a child, he was dared to eat a Drazi volcano pepper by his older sister. It is a commonly held belief, that that's when he lost his sense of taste. Quite tragic,' he replied with all seriousness.

'A Drazi volcano pepper?' Celina gasped. 'I'm surprised he didn't lose his tongue!'

'Apparently, he went a week with it wrapped in gauze,' Neroon said with a smile.

'Oh, that's so sad!' she replied, trying to look sympathetic and failing. But Celina couldn't help smiling at the thought of a little Minbari warrior running around with his tongue wrapped in gauze. She turned her head to the side and saw that all the Centauri at the open café to the side were looking at them. Some surreptitiously over their drinks, most just outright staring.

'Looks like they've never seen a Minbari warrior chatting with a Human woman on the side of the street before,' Celina said, looking to Neroon. He held his hands behind his back and was giving the people staring at him an appraising look. And in accord with their view that no one would dare hurt them because of their wealthy importance, the Centuari stupidly continued to stare back. This seemed to annoy Neroon and he was quickly in a stare off with a café full of rich Centauri. She doubted Neroon would just walk away without taking some action against the Centauri gawkers. This seemed to be a situation that could only end in bloodshed. There just didn't seem to be any other . . . 'Know what would probably give them heart attacks?' Neroon didn't even look at her, busy in the stare down. 'If you kissed me.' He looked to her sharply at that. 'No, think about it. If just seeing us talk civilly has them gawking. I'm pretty sure they'd all fall over dead if you kissed me. At least, their expressions would be priceless.' He appeared skeptical. 'Lorella told me there are no security cameras in the colony. No matter how many of them say it's true, no one is going to believe that a Minbari warrior just walked up with a Human and kissed her in front of a café. No one will believe them, which will make it all the better. And I promise,' she said, holding up a finger, 'I won't use my tongue.'

Neroon had his lips pressed into a thin line and she wondered if she had gone too far. He glanced to the side at the Centauri staring. Then he looked back to her and she raised a challenging eyebrow.

Really, she didn't think he'd actually do it. She was sure he'd give her a withering look and stamp back to the transport. Celina didn't think he'd snake an arm around her waist, pull her against him (she almost tripped over her own feet in shock), and kiss her. At first, it was a very light touch and movement of the lips and he pulled back after only a moment. She opened her mouth to say something witty to help combat her nervousness, but what she had construed as him pulling back because he was done was just him getting a better angle.

It was weird at first, because she couldn't get over the fact that she was kissing someone that she shouldn't be. Though her mind wasn't quite working so well to know exactly why she wasn't supposed to be. The strangest thing was, she never forgot it was Neroon and that was amazingly arousing. Tension had pulled so tight between them for months, that now that it had actually come to this, all of the passion with which they had fought and sometimes even hated each other caused the kiss to quickly turn from a silly ploy. It was made deep with their frustrations; Neroon's rough and demanding while Celina's was more wanting and giving. Though she had promised to keep her tongue to herself, Neroon had made no such promises.

It was so undeniably personal.

After what felt like only a breathless moment, he pulled back and Celina was slightly embarrassed to realize that she had hooked her arms around his neck. She had no remembrance of doing that. Neroon looked to the side and his smug smile made her turn and see what he was looking at.

Luckily, it was a generally windless day, because any bit of movement could have caused the dozen or so Centauri men and women to fall over. One particular older lady had a silver cup raised halfway to her lips but she was so slack-jawed that she had obviously forgotten her intention to drink.

The Centauri man behind the counter serving the drinks started to laugh good naturedly before clapping his hands. A few others laughed, seemingly at the level of their shock, but clapped as well. One or two at a nearby table stamped their feet from their seats, the baser Centauri version of a clap.

Feeling slightly silly with nerves, Celina barely got off a shaky curtsy before Neroon grabbed her by the arm and dragged her away. She tried not to think of what the Centauri would assume from seeing Neroon kiss her like that and then be in such a hurry to shepherd her away. He said nothing personal to her all the way back to the Ingata. But she knew it would be okay when Neroon made a dry remark about her not getting herself tangled in her seat harness.

-----

The recycled air tasted strange after the short days with the salty spray of a fresh ocean breeze. She hoped it would not take long for her to adapt and forget what real air felt like. Without the sun on her skin, Celina was uncharacteristically cold in her silk blouse and cotton slacks. She felt oddly weak, her nerves still abuzz with the lingering excitement from Neroon's unexpected kiss. It was also difficult as she had just begun to adjust to the time difference from the Ingata to Damiera 2 and now she had to struggle with the change back. In the colony, it was late night. On the Ingata, it was midday. Neroon must have somehow sensed her weariness (as if her poor posture, dragging footsteps, and one nicely placed weary sigh didn't make it obvious) and ordered a warrior that had accompanied them to escort her back to their quarters. He had the warrior carry her two, small black bags back for her as well. This seemed strange as her hands were quite free. The clothes she had brought with her to the colony were in a satchel slung over her shoulder and across her chest. When he had first said this, Celina couldn't understand why. Yes, she was obviously exhausted, but he still would have made her carry her own bags before, instead of having one of his trained warriors act as the Ingata bellhop.

Could it have been just because of the kiss? Somehow, she felt indignant about that so she pulled Neroon aside and decided to ask him.

'He is being subtly punished,' the Alyt answered curtly, obviously as indignant at the insinuation in her question as she had been about what she had felt from his order's insinuation paired with the events of the day.

'Why?'

Neroon sighed but explained, 'He thought it would be funny to push his fellow warrior into an overly hospitable Centuari lady when he thought I wasn't looking.'

"Ohh," Celina said to herself before embarrassingly adding, 'I didn't mean to imply . . .'

'Yes, you did.'

'That is to say, I'm sorry that I implied that. And I'm sorry that I wasn't sure you wouldn't do such a thing,' she apologized sincerely, wishing she had just left it be.

Celina barely caught him muttering what might have been a, 'So am I,' as he turned and moved back to the Minbari waiting to escort her back to their quarters. The other two warriors that had accompanied them had already left to various duties. Neroon reminded the warrior to hurry as he said that he still expected him to cover his fellow's next shift. But if he rushed and broke anything in her bags (she thought this funny since the bags only had clothes in them and Neroon knew they were rather unbreakable) Celina would be sure to tell on him.

"Oh!" Celina said, thinking it best to tell Neroon of the need to change his orders. 'I need to go see Velnier actually. Right away.' The Alyt considered her with what might have been concern but she doubted anyone would see it if they weren't looking for it. She tried to sound nonchalant. 'So, perhaps, he can escort me to the infirmary and then drop off my bags in our quarters before hurrying on to his duty shift?'

Neroon gave a nod and turned on his heel before disappearing to whatever important duties that Celina had no clue about. She doubted it was anything more glamorous than coordinating the supply run.

She turned to look at the warrior holding her bags and was surprised to see him not look the least bit upset. In fact he still had a tiny smile on his face.

'Was it worth it?' Celina asked and he looked to her at first in surprise, then seemed to realize that she knew.

'Completely,' he answered. She laughed and let him lead her to the nearest lift.

-----

The warrior escorted her all the way into the Infirmary. She didn't think he looked forward to walking around alone with two bags of women's clothing. Especially since the bags had the store's name printed in large letters on each side. There was no way he could carry the bags where the huge letters spelling out the Centauri word for PASSION were not clearly visible. Neroon sometimes had a subtle sense of humor but in her opinion that's what made it all the more priceless.

She stood in the entrance of the infirmary for a full three seconds before she realized that he was still standing behind her. He was looking down at the bags again. Apparently, he was reconsidering whether it had been worth it.

'How many Minbari know how to speak Centauri anyway?' she turned and asked him.

'Too many,' he muttered and she laughed, a little because her nerves were becoming high strung again, in expectation of the conversation she was to have with Velnier.

'Well, I hope you learned your lesson,' she said, motioning to the doors with her eyes. He seemed to get the hint.

'Yes,' he said, moving out the door, 'the Alyt sees all.'

The doors closed behind him and she turned back and nearly jumped at Velnier standing right in front of her. It was disconcerting how a large Minbari warrior could move so quietly. It was more than disconcerting. It was just plain wrong.

'I'm not supposed to see you for another four days,' he said, with a raised brow. 'I hope there are no more surprises?'

Celina smiled a bit though she wasn't actually happy. 'Actually, there is one.'

He looked to her expectantly.

'I think I lost the baby,' she answered and any hint of expression vanished from his face. Velnier seemed to collect himself quickly and gave a short nod, before shepherding her into the familiar examination room. Celina couldn't figure what he felt about what she said. This disappointed her as she had hoped to base her emotions off of his. She didn't want to go to Neroon, still unsure of what she should think of her loss. Or of whether anyone would even think of it as such.

-----

When she awoke, Celina could smell the burning. She was curled up on the couch, with the blanket she had stolen from the bed thrown over her. The room was dark other than the candle burning across the room from her. Celina had thought Neroon understood her problem with that candle. Apparently not.

She sat up and tossed the blanket on the end of the couch. When she stood, the long, black silk negligee fell from where it had scrunched around her knees down to just above her ankles. It was the only nightwear that Lorella had picked that Celina felt comfortable wearing around Neroon. She walked to the entrance to their bedroom.

'What are you doing?' she asked softly, to not disturb him if he wished to ignore her.

'Meditating,' he answered simply from where he sat out of uniform, cross-legged on the floor with his eyes closed.

'Oh no, what have I driven you to?' Celina said with a small smile, leaning a hand on the side of the fabric panels separating the rooms. 'How's that working for you?'

'I have realized that there is a slight hum that emanates from the deck plating.'

She was silent for several moments, listening hard. 'No,' she replied, shaking her head slightly, causing her hair to tickle her bare shoulders. 'You're imagining it.'

He opened his eyes to glare at her. They widened at the sight of her, looking her over once from head to toe, before glancing to the side. She looked down at herself and found that she still believed the garment was not overly solicitous. It seemed very subtle to her. Celina had worn shirts to bed that exposed more skin than this. Though she had to admit that her accidental positioning did lend her a nice candlelit backlighting. Neroon looked back up to her and frowned when he found her smirking knowingly.

She quickly walked forward and sat on the ground in front of him, curling her legs to the side of her and leaning on a hand to the side. 'Maybe I have to be closer to the deck to hear it,' Celina explained before sighing and straightening the negligee on her thighs. 'It's strange how things work out, don't you think? One moment, we are fretting because something is, and then the next we are fretting because it isn't. I suppose I'm lucky that in each case, I've let a paper tell you what I'd rather not. If it were up to me, I'd rather not talk about it all. Act like it never was. Because I was sad where I should have been happy and now am happy where I should be sad. Well, perhaps not happy. I wonder if that makes me a coward . . .'

'It is simply amazing how much trouble you have been able to stir in so short a time,' he said, resting his hands on his thighs.

'More trouble than I'm worth?'

'Most certainly.'

'You know what they say?' Celina asked and he raised his brow in challenge. 'Trouble comes in pairs.'

'Who says that?' Neroon replied skeptically.

She shrugged with a smile. 'I don't know. But doesn't it sound like something they would say?'

He tried to remain skeptical but a small, reluctant smile broke away. Neroon looked to the ceiling as if in search of patience he didn't possess.

'Branmer called you a loriel,' he said, with that small smile. She knew that had to have some deeper reference that she didn't get.

'A what?'

'Loriel,' Neroon answered. 'It's a mythical creature that fed off Minbari men, causing strife. They often took the guise of young women in distress and these men were unable to escape their seemingly innocent charms. It's now a name applied to women who seem to court melodrama and pull innocent men in with them.'

'I suppose that's better than being named a succubus.'

'Succubus?'

She smiled ruefully. 'You don't want to know. Let's just say it's a woman that feeds off men.' Celina thought a few moments before adding, 'And I don't feed off men or court melodrama. I just seem to be having terrible luck lately. I am not a loriel.'

'So goes the siren song of a loriel.'

She reached out and punched him on the shoulder. He just chuckled at her frustrations.

'I am not a loriel,' Celina muttered. She sighed. 'But I suppose there are far more worse things Branmer could be calling me with all the trouble I am putting him through. I suppose the Gray Council knows?'

'That you're a loriel? Of course.'

'Neroon . . .'

'Yes, they have been informed. Earth Alliance still wants you to return to Earth for a time,' he said.

'They have had all that communication going on in less than a day? Then why did they go for endless weeks without coming to a simple resolution?'

'The Gray Council works in a time of their own making.'

'See . . . I still don't understand what you mean by that. I think you're being purposefully mystical about their hemming and hawing,' she replied.

'What I mean is that no one tells the Gray Council to hasten,' Neroon responded.

'Not even Valen?' She laughed at him looking slightly put out by her finding an exception so quickly. 'I suppose it's like saying no one is going to tell the Vatican to move to New Vegas. Except for Jesus . . . Perhaps it's best that I return to Earth for a little while.'

He blinked once at her change in subject but didn't seem otherwise off put by the logic of her jump. 'If you leave, you may not be allowed to return.'

'And wouldn't that be a holiday for the residents of the Ingata?' she said with a laugh.

'You should take that possibility seriously,' Neroon replied.

'God works in mysterious ways, Neroon,' Celina stated. 'Branmer's right. There's been one drama after another over the last few months.'

'Perhaps that is an unavoidable nature of the pairing of a Minbari with a Human.'

'Most certainly,' she answered. 'But that doesn't mean it's not exhausting for everyone involved. I think it'd probably be better for us if I went away for a little while. You know what they say?' He looked to her expectantly. "Absence makes the heart grow fonder."

Neroon considered this for a long moment before replying, 'They say a lot of things, don't they?'

'It's all they do,' Celina said with a small smile. 'Plus, I think you are really the source of all this drama. _You_ are the loriel.' She laughed. 'You look so affronted! Did I insult your manliness? Alright, you're a manly loriel.'

'I am _not_ a loriel.'

'So you sing,' she replied with delight. Celina continued on when he did not look amused. 'I think I should go back to Earth. For a little while.'

'Yes, I think that best,' he agreed

'Do you think the Gray Council will let me?'

'What's actually in question is once we get rid of you, how Earth is going to convince us to take you back,' Neroon answered.

She raised a brow. 'You seem very concerned with that.'

'I am not.'

'Are you afraid that you're going to . . . _miss_ me, Neroon?'

He frowned. 'I have merely become _accustomed_ to you. And I do not like changing my habits seasonally. Why do you smile like I am complimenting you when I am _not_?'

'Because you always speak the truth, Neroon,' she said with the smile. 'You just coach it differently. And you don't compliment with your words. You compliment with your actions. I would prefer that to pretty words any day.'

'My actions?' he asked, tilting his head to the side just slightly with a smug smile.

'Yes. You compliment me when you smile at me. When you sit on the cold floor to continue to talk to me. When you kiss me.'

'You dared me to do that,' Neroon responded.

'I never said dare,' she reminded.

'Your eyes did.'

'My eyes?'

'Yes.'

'I see . . .' Celina muttered to herself. Finally she moved to her knees and Neroon just watched her. She reached forward with a hand and placed it on his jaw. He raised his brow. Celina took it as a dare.

They both tensed when she pressed her lips to his, but neither pulled away. Neither wanting to be the one to back down. She tried to kiss him like he had kissed her, trying to instill the same excitement. But this was not the same as that. The circumstances would not let it be. Her body was exhilarated when he opened his mouth below hers and actually allowed her that bit of intrusion. She felt his hands again come to rest on her waist. However, this time, his grip was tight, thumbs pressing into the small hallow beside her hip bones.

She pulled back long enough to breathe with her face close, looking to his eyes for permission. He seemed to consider for the barest moment before pulling lightly on her hips. Celina moved forward and, pressing her hands onto his chest, crawled onto his lap. Her negligee was slit slightly up the sides and allowed her such movement. It bunched high on her hips when she straddled his waist. The danger of her audacity excited her and it was even better when his hand slid down and behind her to pull her closer.

Neroon sought her out and kissed her, causing her to unconsciously hook her arms around his neck. The feel of his skin was warm and smooth underneath her touch and where he pressed up against her from pelvis up through the chest. She felt a hand slip underneath her negligee to come to grip her upper thigh. Another was skin to skin on the small of her back.

Her mind felt completely separated from what her body was doing. She wasn't thinking and didn't seem to miss it, quickly finding a high without a pill. A needed respite from problem after problem. And she was also going to be gone for some time. If there were any further problems from this, she wouldn't have to face them day in and day out. She wouldn't have to face him. Celina felt him pull his hands away and then he broke from their kiss. Panic set in that perhaps he was able to think.

Neroon must have seen the dismay on her face because he smiled smugly, kissed her chastely, and placed a hand on her back between her shoulder blades. She couldn't figure what he was doing at first when he leaned over her, stretching out an arm. But she quickly understood when he moved to his knees, causing her to end up on the floor beneath him.

The allure of the seemingly forbidden was intoxicating and neither seemed willing to tear themselves away from the rush of feeling. Not if they didn't absolutely have to. And there was no one there to stop them.

The candle burned itself out.

-----

Thank you for reading. I would dearly appreciate it if you'd take a moment to make my day and leave me a note telling me what you thought of my story. If you leave an email to contact you by, I would like to thank you for reading and answer any questions you may wish to pose.

Please continue on to the next chapter . . .


	16. Chapter 16

**Chapter Sixteen:**

_"Every great fall begins with a single mistake." _  
- Drazi to Sheridan: "A Tragedy of Telepaths"

-----

The way they seemed to be dealing with the change in the intimacy of their relationship was that they didn't talk about it. It didn't stop it from happening again. They simply did not talk about it. Both seemed most comfortable with this silent agreement.

Though Neroon never actually incinerated her old ones, Lorella would have been pleased that Celina was getting a great deal of use out of all her new intimates. She didn't quite think what she wore mattered to him very much. But it did make her feel pretty, so she was happy.

'Should I be insulted that everyone agreed to send me back to Earth so quickly? I know it's only for three months but still . . .' she asked while folding her clothes into one of the boxes she used to pack for the Ingata. 'I mean we just threw out the option and the nine said, 'YES!' You know, if I didn't have such a big ego, I would take that personally.'

'It is not personal,' Neroon said. He was sitting on the couch. The console was on in front of him. But he hadn't been working for some time.

'So it's not because they don't like me?' she asked teasingly, stuffing her socks inside the perimeter of the box.

'Of course not,' he replied. 'They do not know you. Thus, they haven't had the opportunity to not like you . . . What they don't like is what you are.'

'Great!' Celina said in mock delight. 'My personality can change. Unfortunately, I can't grow out of being Human.'

'Truly tragic,' Neroon responded and she threw a rolled up sock at his head. 'Like your aim,' he added when he watched it fly harmlessly over his shoulder to fall behind the couch.

'Well, take heart, for your wife may be gone but her stockings cover your air vents, there's a pair of her socks behind your couch, and we still can't find my black lace,' she looked into her lap where her panties were piled in her lap waiting to be added to the box. It was difficult to be embarrassed to have her undergarments laying around when it was true that there was a great deal of them always around. 'Umm . . . you remember.'

'I'm sure I will come across them,' he replied with that smug smile. 'Eventually.'

'Yes and when you do,' she said before glancing around herself, 'send me a note because I have no idea where they could be hiding. But I am quite curious.' Celina looked to him at his silence. 'You . . . .wouldn't know where they are, would you?'

'What are you suggesting?' he asked in a serious tone.

She shrugged it off, 'Never mind. I forgot who I was talking to for a moment.'

'I am surprised that you aren't more wary of the debriefing that awaits you on your return to Earth,' Neroon said.

'What's the worst they can do to me?' Celina asked rhetorically. 'Say they are disappointed in me? Too bad. It's not like I've never been disappointed in them. Yell at me? Unless they're bringing my grandmother along to do it, I'm not scared. Kill me? I've survived nearly half a year on a Minbari War Cruiser. I think I can survive whatever bureaucrat they're sending to meet up with me at Io. I've even been working on my lines.'

'Your lines?'

"Yes. No. I was scared. I don't know. I did not have sexual relations with that man," she answered and his expression looked crossed between humor and bemusement. 'Go ahead. Ask a question they might pose . . . Go ahead.'

Neroon looked skeptical. 'What were you thinking?'

"I was scared." She smiled. 'Ask another.'

'What did you learn from your experience on the Ingata?'

"I don't know. I was scared."

'What did you learn from Alyt Neroon?'

Celina swallowed her smile and answered seriously, "I did not have sexual relations with that man. I was scared."

'I have never been so thankful for the ease with which my wife can lie,' he replied with a raised brow. 'But would they believe that?'

'Why not? It's worked before. Well, no actually it didn't. But I'm sure they will believe me being scared.'

'Are you scared?' Neroon asked and she smiled.

'At this moment? At this moment, it's hard to be scared while folding my intimates. Somehow, I doubt you'd attack me when I have an arsenal of underwear at hand.'

'No, I would let you finish packing away your things.'

She laughed. 'Like letting a man dig his own grave before you kill him.'

'I would know little of that.'

'About disposing of a body?'

He smiled dangerously. 'I've never had to care about disposing of the bodies.'

'See after months of comments like that, how is a bureaucrat who stays at home eating popcorn and watching Rebo and Zooty going to intimidate me?'

'Rebo and Zooty?' he asked.

"Yeah," she replied before adding with the appropriate hand motion, "Zooty zoot zoot!" He did not look amused so she waved it away with the same hand. 'Forget it.'

'How is it that you came with two boxes but are leaving with only one?' he asked, searching the room with his eyes as if noting every bit of herself that she was leaving behind.

'That, my dear Minbari, is because a great deal of the things I am leaving here I have or can easily obtain on Earth. So there is no reason to haul it away from here, only to haul it back in three months. Like my media, for example. Between family and friends, I will have access to all the media I brought here and more.' She smiled. 'And I thought you may be able to look through it to help improve your English. You're good but you lack . . . the ease with which you need to speak it.'

'I do not _need_ to speak English,' the Alyt said, irritably.

'Maybe not today, Neroon,' Celina replied offhandedly while returning to her packing. 'But who knows what tomorrow will bring? No one ever truly comes to regret having knowledge that they could have used. Everyone comes to regret when they don't. Fight ignorance, Alyt. It is the true enemy. And, though I don't agree with all of what you say, you have a voice that is meant to be heard. Somehow, I don't think you are the type to trust others to translate for you. '

'How indecent of you,' he remarked in an amused voice from where he watched her on the couch.

She glanced at him over her shoulder with a frown. 'Indecent?'

'You finally decide to become palatable once we decide to send you away,' Neroon said dryly. 'It's plain indecent of you.'

"Hmm," she murmured to herself, 'I was under the impression you liked me indecent.'

'On the other hand . . .' he said and she laughed. 'Perhaps it is best that you are leaving for a short time. You are becoming immodest.'

'Indecent _and_ immodest?' Celina joked. 'You should be so lucky, Neroon. I know a dozen men who would pay for women with those qualities.'

'How is it that when I make that comparison I get a vase thrown at my head, but when you do it is a compliment?'

'Womanly prerogative,' she explained as if it were a great secret.

"Ah." Neroon nodded sagely. She laughed and he sat in silent thought and watched as Celina hummed to herself, off tune, and finished her packing. For some reason, he looked worried.

-----

It would take her six separate transports to get her to Earth in just over two weeks. She would be transported from one ship to the next, with little delay in between. The greatest estimated delay between exiting one ship and boarding the next was four hours. Earth Alliance didn't want her leaving an easy path for others to trace her back into Minbari space. It would raise many questions that they didn't want to answer. She was even traveling under an assumed name to give them easier deniability.

Until she reached Earth, her name was Maria Sanchez. She wondered how long it took them to think up _that_ name. And if they thought themselves too clever when they did.

"Maria. . . .Maria . . . why did they have to pick Maria," she muttered to herself while standing in the lift with Neroon to her side. Celina looked to him sidelong. 'I hate that name.'

He nodded before asking, 'Why?'

'It is the quintessential Hispanic name,' Celina explained. 'To me, it is a walking stereotype. It's like naming a white woman Jane. It's just so . . . expected. Bland. Boring. Blah.'

Neroon was simply staring ahead at the lift door, willing it to open. He seemed not to be following what she was saying. It didn't matter; she wasn't talking for his benefit anyway. Celina ranted on.

'Maria is your middle name,' he interrupted and at the cold silence from her he turned to meet her eyes. Neroon almost cringed. Almost.

'That is because God is cruel and that was the second cosmic joke he ever played on me.'

Neroon thought about that for a moment before he had to ask, 'The first?'

'My conception,' she answered and he nodded as if he should have foreseen that.

'I like your God's sense of humor,' Neroon confided and she would remember that statement as she sat on the transport, fretting over the depth of its intended meaning. But at that moment, she took it at face value and laughed.

'No surprise there,' Celina muttered. The lift came to a halt. Three seconds. The door always began to open three seconds after stopping. She had learned that fact two weeks after her arrival on the Ingata. That was a moment Celina recalled along with the realization that she had to get some more hobbies.

'You are anxious,' he remarked as they walked out of the lift and down the corridor towards the docking bay.

'I just realized something,' she remarked before catching his eyes sidelong. 'I'd like to think there'd be problems if something happened to Celina Amador. But what if something were to happen to Maria Sanchez? Considering she doesn't exist.'

'That name is only being used in the records that Earth filed. All mentions of you and your journey according to the Minbari are under Celina Amador, a ward of the Star Riders clan. We have a vested interest in you. I don't believe Earth will risk you disappearing on their watch when they have to answer to us. You are quite safe, no matter your name.'

'You know, for once, I'd like someone to tell me,' she switched to a sweet sounding voice, 'No, Celina. You are quite safe because no one would ever hurt you. That would be wrong. And we are all good people.' Celina sighed and returned to her normal voice, 'If only it were so black and white.'

'There is wisdom in embracing the gray,' Neroon advised, having to temper his gait to fit her shorter one.

'Perhaps,' Celina admitted, 'but not as much happiness.'

'Happiness is transitory. Wisdom is a more satisfying virtue.'

'Not a better one.'

Neither continued the thought. It was not the time to argue over whom or what was more right. Both were stubbornly sure in the fact that they were the wiser and were the happier for it, not yet disenchanted with themselves.

'Is there anything you want me to bring back for you from Earth?' she asked outside the docking bay door with an ambiguous mix of humor and sincerity. He frowned at her. 'Not even a shirt that reads, "I Sent My Wife Back To Earth and All I Got Was This Stupid T-Shirt?"' She laughed nervously. 'How about this; when I come back, I'll wear a shirt that reads, "Return to Sender."'

He cracked a small smile at that, probably more at her inanity than anything else. That always seemed to reluctantly amuse him. Most of the time, she didn't mind, as it was nice to be appreciated in any fashion. Neroon directed her into the docking bay. One Minbari warrior was standing outside the open transport that was waiting to shuttle her to her next transport about six hours away.

She thought he looked terribly familiar but couldn't place him for the life of her. Finally, as he walked closer, with a somewhat guarded expression, Celina placed him. He was the Minbari that had picked her up and threw her to the floor a short time after her arrival!

"He's shuttling me?" she muttered in English, hoping the other Minbari wouldn't understand. Celina smiled nervously at him. He squinted his eyes at her in return, obviously not trusting the friendly gesture.

"He does know we are speaking of him. It is considered rude," Neroon replied.

Her smile widened. "Good. So is throwing a little girl to the floor."

The Alyt smiled sardonically and said darkly, 'He feels terrible about that.' The warrior gave a sharp nod. Celina continued to watch him out of the corner of her eye suspiciously. She had to admit that she always did believe he regretted his action as soon as it was committed but that didn't mean she wanted to be alone with him on a transport for the next six hours.

"Fine!" Celina huffed and threw out a hand. 'Truce?' The warrior looked to her hand in confusion. She sighed. 'Give me your hand.' Now he looked suspicious but at Neroon's stern (and slightly amused) look he did as he was told. Celina took his hand and shook it three times before pushing it back at him. 'Good. Now you're forgiven. But _not_ forgotten.' He looked down at his hand confused again before glancing up to the Alyt. Neroon rolled his shoulders back in what Celina's impression was a sort of shrug. "Is this your sense of humor, Neroon?"

He smiled. 'Actually, it is the Shai'Alyt's. Though I am enjoying it as well.'

"Silly me to think my punishment was over," Celina muttered to herself.

"Somehow, I believe he is thinking the same thing," Neroon muttered back. The one in question glanced between them curiously, before looking to the floor and simply waiting. Minbari, at least the warriors, tended to resign themselves to misery rather easily in Celina's opinion. It seemed a matter of the honor of duty than true disillusionment. She wondered idly what it'd take to disenchant a Minbari.

Celina was eager to get to Earth, her home with her family, friends, and those who truly loved her. But over the last few months, she had become undeniably connected to the Ingata and Neroon. So long she had strived to ingratiate herself with the life of the ship that it was not strange that she was feeling growing pains. And she was also scared of what awaited her on Earth.

Would she arrive there only to realize that it wasn't home anymore and everyone's lives had moved on without her? Would she no longer be part of Earth? As long as she was on the Ingata, she could imagine home in terms of comfort and normalcy. She didn't want to return and find everyone not knowing how to act around her, what to say and what not to. She didn't want to be disenchanted by her family and friends. Worst of all was the thought of were they already so with her?

After the outpost, it was the war that held them together and welcomed her back with open arms. Now, it could be that same war the kept them apart and closed their minds.

'Three months,' Neroon told her with a promise in his voice. That she would return and no matter what she found on Earth, there was a place set aside in expectation of her on the Ingata.

"It's a date," she replied with a smile, reaching out and squeezing his hand. He reflexively squeezed it back before he stole it away. Neroon had this air as if he was tolerating her and she told herself it was simply him acting appropriately in front of the other warrior. He turned her around and pushed her towards the transport.

Dutifully, she followed her pilot to the small ship. But once he disappeared inside the entrance, she couldn't help pausing at the top of the small stairs and blowing a kiss at Neroon. Celina laughed at his bemusement. He smiled slightly and walked away.

The transport departed without problems.

-----

Celina was utterly exhausted and at her wits end, though she had just departed from Io and there were still several days of travel in normal space to arrive at Earth. So far, she had dealt with the stress of the journey by retreating to her private cabin. But now Celina shared said cabin with a perky bureaucrat.

"Hi! You must be Celina!"

She just blinked at the exuberance in those two sentences. A woman in a posh suit with cropped black hair and such lovely blue eyes that Celina knew they had to be fake sidled up to her in the small room.

"I'm Isabel Lopez y Famosa," the woman told her while sticking out her hand. Celina mechanically shook it, wondering how long it'd take for Isabel to let her walk properly into the room. "We're going to be bunk mates on our trip back to Earth."

"You're the bureaucrat they sent to interrogate me," she replied, looking over Isabel's shoulder longingly into the room beyond.

"Oh, I wouldn't call it that," Isabel replied with an overly eager smile. She was young . . . Younger than Celina would have expected to have been assigned something this important. Obviously, Isabel could hardly believe her luck either. Celina doubted it was a coincidence that Earth Alliance sent a young Hispanic girl who could have been her older sister. Though Isabel had more Cuban features than Mexican.

"Of course, you wouldn't," Celina muttered. "Can I come in?" she finally asked, her patience run out.

"Oh!" The woman actually seemed to blush a bit before letting Celina in and closing the door behind her. "I hope you don't mind that I already set up the beds."

"No," she replied, tossing her heavy satchel on the small desk across from the bunk bed. "That was nice of you. I hate having to mess with those plastic bags the bedding comes in."

"Look," Isabel began in a deeper voice trying to inspire confidence, "We both know that I was sent here to talk to you about your experience with the Minbari. No, I'm not here to interrogate you. I'm sure you will tell me everything that you can. You've done so much for Earth already. You've made sacrifices that I can't even imagine being placed upon me. And you've done it with so much grace."

Celina had to look incredulous at that.

The woman sighed and took a step forward. "You've been alone . . . . amongst _Minbari_," she said the name as if it were terrible, "for so many months, I'm sure you're just eager to get home amongst your own kind. I understand that it might be hard for you to open up after so many months of guarding yourself." Isabel put a hand on her chest and smiled. "I understand. Really I do. But you have to understand that we both have a job to do. I really respect you and would like to be your friend if I could be. I think we'd really get along. But I have to warn you that I'm probably going to ask questions that neither of us is going to be comfortable with. I regret that. But just like I have to put myself in your shoes, I need you to put yourself in my shoes. Can you do that? Can you put yourself in my shoes?"

Celina blinked several times, before looking to the side, and pursing her lips in thought. Finally she looked down at her feet, then at Isabel's.

"Sorry," Celina replied, looking back up to the woman, "I don't wear stilettos unless I'm trying to get lucky . . . Are you trying to get lucky?"

For a moment, Isabel seemed confused, then insulted, but then she laughed it off.

"At least we know you didn't lose your sense of humor," she said with a smile and Celina raised one eyebrow.

"Yeah, because everyone knows Minbari have no sense of humor," Celina stated sarcastically, which seemed to go over Isabel's head or was so ingrained in the woman's perspective that she didn't think it possible as a joke in itself.

"You poor thing," Isabel intoned, grasping her by the shoulder. Then her face suddenly brightened into a smile. "Dibs on top bunk!"

That was when Celina knew she was going straight to hell and she didn't even have a private hand basket.

-----

It took two days before Celina was able to break Isabel. Though it probably was supposed to be the other way around. She held nothing back save the extent of her relationship with Neroon, but generally only repeated the information she had sent in her reports. After all, Celina hadn't forgotten that her allegiance was to Earth Alliance. Not the Minbari. This seemed to frustrate Isabel to no end. By that day, she seemed almost desperate to get something important out of Celina. She wasn't sure exactly what Isabel expected her to profess. It wasn't as if the Minbari had revealed any great secrets to her.

The last day before they would arrive at Earth, Celina returned from the restrooms with a magazine she had bought from the small reading rack on the way back. She arrived to find Isabel lying on her back in the top bunk. At first, she thought she was sleeping. Then she heard her sniffle. She rolled her eyes that the woman might have a cold that she would probably give to Celina.

Throwing herself back on her own bunk, she opened the magazine and stared at a picture of a bare chested Jack Halliwell. It appeared he had a new movie that was going to be released. As an action film hero. Seemed like a waste of a voice that seemed born to either speak Shakespeare or evil threats.

Isabel sniffled again.

"Do you need a tissue?" Celina asked through the mattress above her head.

"No, thank you," the woman said back in a broken voice. That's when she realized Isabel was crying. She rolled her eyes and immediately felt guilty for her flippancy with the other woman's feelings.

"Are you crying?" she questioned and the woman just sniffled. "Why are you crying, Isabel? Look, I'm sorry for saying you don't know what you're doing."

"It's ok," Isabel whispered back. "You're right. I don't."

"No, you're doing really well," Celina said back.

Isabel laughed. "You haven't told me anything that wasn't in the reports. I just wanted to do well at this."

"It's not because of you. I just pretty much told everything there was to tell in the reports."

"Really?"

"Yes."

"There's nothing you couldn't put past the Minbari?"

"They really didn't tell me anything that they wouldn't mind me relaying," she explained. "But of course, there were some interesting things that happened. Like a huge jumping spider snuck on the ship a while ago. Neroon tore our quarters apart going after it."

There was a short silence before Isabel asked. "Your quarters? You shared quarters?"

"Yes, we did," Celina replied, realizing for the first time that Earth probably didn't know about that but would most likely find it interesting.

"From the beginning?" Isabel questioned, her tears seemingly forgotten at finding out something new and interesting.

"Yeah."

"Did you sleep in the same room?"

"In the same bed." She heard the woman shift on the bunk above her.

"Did he ever try to make a move on you?" Isabel spoke in a small voice, as if scared that her excitement would show if she raised it any louder.

"No," Celina answered. She heard Isabel sigh from above, either out of relief or disappointment.

"You must have become really close to him, living so close with him for so many months."

"Is that a question?"

"Did you become attached to each other?"

"We got used to each other."

"Do you think you gained his trust?"

"Not really."

Isabel paused again in thought. "Not really suggests some trust between you. Does he trust you even a little?" She thought about it for a moment, laying the open magazine over her chest. "Celina?"

"I would say that he doesn't trust me as far as he can throw me, but he can probably throw me pretty far. I think he trusts me to be me. Nothing more. Nothing less."

"So he doesn't care about you?"

"Personally?"

"Yes," Isabel said, breathlessly waiting for the answer.

"No, probably not," Celina replied though she hoped it was a lie. "But he does care about making it work."

"Well, I suppose that's a start," Isabel allowed, shifting above her again. "Maybe we can have you meet with a xenopsychiatrist to see if there's maybe some way you can change how you act to get along with him better. Maybe even gain more of his trust. I don't need to tell you that Earth would be very happy if he came to care about you."

"Of course, then they could use it against him," she responded and there was a short silence from above. Celina wondered if it were because Isabel sensed some of the tenseness in her voice.

"No," Isabel lied and Celina then knew that she had sensed the tension in her last statement. "It would be good for Earth. Help bridge the gap. You understand."

"Yes, I do," Celina replied and returned to her magazine but sighed heavily when Isabel continued anyways.

"And Branmer?"

"Only saw him three times after the marriage ceremony. He's scared of jumping spiders. But I don't think Earth can use that against him as long as he has Neroon to send after them. Now I'm going to return to my magazine."

For the moment, Isabel was satisfied that she finally had something substantial to report.

"Cookie?"

Celina looked up to see the woman's face leaning upside down over the edge of the bed with her arm wrapped around holding out a small cookie to her. She couldn't help but smile.

"Thanks."

Isabel smiled and pulled herself back up onto her own bunk. Celina chewed on the chocolate cookie and deemed the woman acceptable. Especially when silent. She wondered if this was how Neroon thought about her. Celina dearly hoped not. After thinking about it another few moments, she decided it was two very different circumstances that shouldn't be compared.

-----

Thank you for reading. I would dearly appreciate it if you'd take a moment to make my day and leave me a note telling me what you thought of my story. If you leave an email to contact you by, I would like to thank you for reading and answer any questions you may wish to pose.

Please continue on to the next chapter . . .


	17. Chapter 17

**Chapter Seventeen:**

"_The war is never completely won. There are always new battles to fight against the darkness, only the names change." _  
- Delenn: "War Without End II"

-----

Her mother, grandmother, and Diane picked her up from the port. She was pleasantly surprised to see Diane there and told the girl as much. Diane just smiled and hugged her. On the ride back to the base, her mother was deathly silent, seemingly on edge. Celina realized she didn't know how to talk to her daughter anymore and was too scared to make any statements more serious than about the weather. Her grandmother was a bit better, but not touching the subject of where Celina had been for the last several months. Everyone referred to it as, "when you were away." Diane seemed to be the only one with questions about where she had been. Celina was so tired from the journey and the multitude of time changes that she simply answered the questions as quickly as possible. When it got to the point where Celina was hardly able to finish an explanation without yawning, Diane was getting a bit testy with frustration. Of course, it might have been only Celina's fatigued impression. But she didn't think so, once her grandmother curtly told Diane to, "Shut up, mi hija."

Celina spent most of the day asleep in her old room, which had now been turned back into a guest room. When she woke up, it was dinner time and her mother had sent Diane home with the promise that Celina would call her later. She entered the living room, drawn out by the sound of another familiar voice. It was General Avery talking with her grandmother. He turned and smiled at her.

She wished she had taken a few minutes more in her bedroom to change out of her wrinkled clothing. Maybe then she would have also had time to shed the vacant look on her face that came about from being wakened out of a very deep sleep.

"General Avery's staying for dinner." Celina jumped a bit at her mother sneaking up behind her. She turned and frowned.

"Isabel already got everything out of me. I'd really rather not be interrogated some more, general."

"Celina!" both her grandmother and mother admonished.

"No, it's alright," the old man replied, keeping his natural smile. "Actually, Celina, I came because I thought you might like to know some of what people in charge are saying about you."

"Are you allowed to tell me that?" she asked.

Avery laughed. "The interesting gossip is not going on through the gold channel. Most of it is through the high ranking grapevine. Very high ranking. Probably would have been too high ranking for me if it weren't for the fact that I was talking to these people every time they came to me to try to get more information out of you."

"Dinner will be ready in ten minutes," her mother told them.

"More than enough," Avery replied. Her mother left the room. Her grandmother held up a small device and pressed a button on top. A red light started blinking rapidly on it.

"This should transmit enough disturbance in case someone's listening in," her grandmother explained before setting it on the coffee table in the middle of the room.

"Thanks, Alita," the general replied, moving to close the curtains. Her grandmother nodded and left the room, touching Celina gently on the shoulder before she passed.

"I thought you said that you were allowed to talk about this," Celina replied once Avery finished the curtains.

"Better safe than sorry," he responded. "And they can use your responses as much against you as they can hold my informing you against me. Perhaps more."

He took a seat on a chair close to the transmitter. Celina followed suit and sat on a large ottoman beside him.

"Miss Lopes y Famosa has recommended that you be sent to a xenopsychiatrist."

"She said as much. She said she thought one could help me figure out how to better act to get inside Neroon's head," Celina stated.

"Yes, I'm sure she did. But I think you should also be aware that that same psychiatrist will probably also be trying to get in your head. For a couple months now, certain terms have been brandied about with your name," he explained.

"What terms?"

"Minbari War Syndrome for one," General Avery said and Celina scoffed. "Stockholm Syndrome seems to be the favorite though."

"That's ridiculous!" she replied. "Neither of those applies to me. First of all, I am not a veteran from the war. Secondly, I'm not a kidnapping victim." He nodded his head but the way he was worrying his thin lips paused Celina in thought. "Don't tell me that you think there's some credit to this?"

"Celina . . ." he began before pausing and seemingly reconsidering. "I'm not a psychiatrist. But how you talked about the Minbari in your reports, the tension that everyone reports getting from you when they try to get you to impart some information about the Minbari, even how many times you use the word 'superior' in reference to them in your reports . . . I won't lie and say it's not disconcerting."

"The only time I use the word 'superior' in reference to the Minbari is when I am talking about their technology," Celina defended herself. "And even an idiot has to admit that's true."

"Perhaps . . ." Avery allowed, "but that doesn't explain how you talk about the Alyt."

"What do you mean? How do I talk about him?" She was genuinely curious and just a bit scared that she was giving away more than she meant to.

"Well, let's start with the obvious, shall we?" he replied, sitting back in the chair and pulling his left ankle up to rest on his other knee. "The evolution of his name: First you called him the Minbari Alyt. Then you called him Alyt. Then you called him Alyt Neroon. And now it appears you are fondly calling him Neroon."

"Oh, that's nothing," she replied. "He calls me Celina. That doesn't mean there's some problem with him."

"Yes, well . . . that's neither here nor there, Celina. What I am trying to tell you is that you need to perhaps keep more attention to the way you talk about the Minbari, including Neroon. Earth will not let you return to the Ingata if they believe that there is any chance that your allegiance is coming into question. You should also not be surprised if they contact you about meeting with a telepath. They'd rather keep Psi Corps out of this, but the idea of a telepath checking your motives is appealing."

Celina sighed. "I'm actually surprised they were able to keep them out of it this long."

"So am I. Though I'm sure the Corps has known about it on some level for a little while," Avery replied and she looked to him for an explanation. "They're telepaths. It's hard to keep anything from them unless they let you."

"I try not to think about that if I can."

"Yes, most of us do too. Too unsettling a thought." Both nodded in agreement, automatically nervous about the power of Psi Corps. They looked up as her grandmother entered the room.

"Table's set. We're just waiting on you," she told them. General Avery reached out and retrieved the transmitter from the table.

"We'll be there in a moment," he said and her grandmother nodded and left. "You should also know Celina that I looked into Mr. Yager after you mentioned him. I found out he had connections to Senator Catalano. Everyone knows Catalano is a Home Guard sympathizer."

"So the weapons were . . ." Celina left off on the thought.

"Probably meant for Home Guard. And I'm sure they aren't happy that it ended up in alien hands."

"Oh, god."

"Shortly after he arrived Earth side empty-handed, he left. Apparently, he was in hot water and wanted to get away from his unhappy connections as soon as possible. Unfortunately that did not end well for him," Avery seemed to pause at the thought. "There was a problem with their life support. Everyone on board died. Including Yager and his daughter."

"Life support? Did the Minbari do that when they fixed it?" Celina asked, feeling the bottom of her stomach drop out.

"Couldn't be," the general replied. "Yager didn't trust the Minbari repairs a moment longer than he had to. Once he returned to Earth, he had the whole system replaced . . . Senator Catalano covered the bill. Ironically, he was probably safer with the Minbari repairs."

"They all died anyway," Celina muttered to herself.

Avery nodded. "Dinner's waiting." He turned off the transmitter and effectively ended the conversation.

Celina followed the general onto the patio outside, where dinner had been set. It was nice to eat dinner out in the open with the New Mexico sunset painting the sky in violence. Still, her own inner worry over what had been said set her into similar upset.

-----

She worried over the general's words during that long night and into the next day. Almost as if they had been waiting on Avery's warning, a request came in for Celina to meet with a telepath at the end of the week. Celina replied immediately with her affirmative. She thought it best that they not be aware that she was worried about it. Celina didn't think that she really had anything to hide from them. The extent of her relationship with Neroon would have been something that she would have rather kept to herself for the time being, but she didn't think that Earth would be completely upset about that. Mostly, she was upset over the thought of the telepath finding something that would encourage the rumors of Minbari War Syndrome or Stockholm Syndrome.

Finally, the next night, she pulled up information on both the disorders. She told herself it was so that she could probably point out how they didn't apply to her. But in actuality, she wanted to ease her mind with finding fact to support her belief on how ridiculous they were.

That was not hard when she pulled up information about Minbari War Syndrome. It was still a new declaration. Some psychologists believed it was just a form of post traumatic stress disorder that didn't even deserve its own title other than to pin blame on the Minbari, instead of on Earth Force's poor psychiatric services. With that aside, looking over the signs of the syndrome, Celina easily threw the option away. She didn't think the Minbari morally better than Humans or closer to God.

But when she pulled up information on Stockholm Syndrome, she increasingly became concerned as she registered possible connections to her situation

Celina read over the information on the screen again:

**Stockholm Syndrome primarily develops under the following conditions:**  
(1) Victim perceives the abuser as a threat to her survival, physically or psychologically. _(Neroon could definitely have been a threat to her. She was always aware that he had the lethal ability to hurt her. There were even several times that she remembered wondering if he were about to kill her.)_  
(2) Victim perceives the abuser is showing her some kindness, however small. _(She did seem to be very alert to every moment of compassion Neroon showed her.)_  
(3) Victim is kept isolated from others. _(She was taken away from all of her people and barely spoke to anyone but Neroon most of the time.)_  
(4) Victim does not perceive a way to escape from the abuser. _(She did think of herself as permanently tied to Neroon now. And she could hardly think of any way to escape that. She didn't even think she wanted to.)_

**Major Indicators that Stockholm Syndrome has developed:**  
(1) Victim has feelings of love and hate for the abuser. _(Her feelings toward Neroon could definitely be termed that confused.) _  
(2) Victim is very grateful for any kindness shown by the abuser. _(Even Neroon seemed uncomfortable with the amount of gratitude she had shown on occasion to his acts of caring.)_  
(3) Victim denies or rationalizes violence by the abuser. _(There were several times that he had acted violently but she always rationalized it away as part of his nature or due to circumstance)_  
(4) Victim focuses on the abuser's needs. _(She didn't think she did this.)_   
(5) Victim sees world from abuser's perspective. _(She had always seen this as part of her job in studying other cultures.) _  
(6) Victim perceives those trying to help her as the "bad guys" and the abuser is the "good guy". _(There were a few moments that she saw Earth Alliance vs. Neroon in those particular roles when she had been pregnant. And Earth probably did think that they were acting in her best interests.)  
_(7) Victim finds it difficult to leave the abuser even when it is okay to do so. _(She did have a very difficult time leaving Neroon in the docking bay, though she knew it was alright to leave him.)_  
(8) Victim fears the abuser will come back to get her, even if he is dead or in prison. _(This did not apply to her at all.)_  
(9) Victim shows signs of PTSD (Post Traumatic Stress Disorder) including depression, low self-esteem, anxiety reactions, paranoia and feelings of helplessness, and recurring nightmares and flashbacks. _(All of these that she had experienced she thought could be chalked up to the stress of circumstance. At least she didn't have nightmares or flashbacks.)_

Looking over the information several times, Celina finally couldn't help it anymore and dragged her mother from bed. The woman sat blearily in front of the console and looked over the information as Celina pointed out her thoughts on each. She nodded where need be, looked concerned, and answered, "Hmm," at the right moments.

"Well?" Celina prompted, gesturing to the console with her hands.

"You think you have this?" her mother asked, slightly confused, in her breathy voice.

"That's what I'm asking you," she replied testily. "Do you think this applies to me?"

"Hmm . . ." The woman read over the information again. "If I said, yes, Celina, what would you do?"

This took Celina back a bit. "Well, I'd believe you and go to a psychiatrist."

"Hmm . . ." her mother hummed again. "The hard thing about treating people with this syndrome, Celina, is that they all believe they don't have it. And don't trust their family and friends enough to tell them they do. You seem very open to both. I think if you are considering this and asking these questions . . . No, I don't think this is you. I don't think this applies to you."

Celina sighed in relief. "You're right. I suppose it's like the fact that if you're able to wonder if you're crazy, you're probably not. Thank you."

"Good night and you should probably go to bed," her mother replied, heading back to her bedroom.

"I have nothing to do tomorrow," Celina said, though she was turning off the computer, already feeling terribly tired now that the adrenaline rush from her fretting was abating.

"Did you call Diane back yet?" she reminded and Celina slapped a hand to her forehead, having totally forgotten about her friend. "Maybe it'd be good for you to go see her tomorrow. In fact, I insist. I haven't been able to properly practice my scales since you arrived. There are some upsides of an empty house."

"Are you trying to get rid of me?" Celina asked, following her mother to bed.

"Definitely."

-----

She called Diane in the morning and they arranged to have lunch together at her friend's apartment for privacy. It was just a little over a mile away from the base, between the local university and a series of warehouses. Deciding that the activity would do her good and it was such a beautiful day, Celina chose to walk to Diane's place. Her mother had already begun practicing her scales when she left, so she just knocked on the basement's door and told her mother that she would be gone for a while. She didn't know if her mother had heard her, but didn't worry about it.

Diane opened the door with a wide smile and an excited air. Celina was quickly shepherded inside. Music was playing very gently in the next room. She could barely hear it but it was nice and made her comfortable. She could smell something delicious and her stomach grumbled.

"Pizza arrived just a couple minutes ago," her friend explained, taking Celina's light jacket and putting it on a chair by the door. "That is an amazing corset, Celina."

She looked down and pulled at the top of the soft leather corset nervously.

"I thought you'd like it," she replied.

"I do," Diane said, walking into the living room. Celina followed. "Where did you get it?"

"Damiera 2. It's a colony on the edge of Centauri space. It was a gift."

Diane turned and asked with a raised eyebrow, "From your husband?"

"No," Celina answered. "From my friend Lady Lorella. I've told you about her before."

"Oh, yeah," Diane said flippantly, losing most interest with the subject. Two large pizza containers were sitting on her long, rectangular coffee table.

"My god, Diane, is that enough pizza?" she laughed.

"Well, I didn't know when was the last time you had some good junk food, but I knew I wanted to have enough. Let's eat!"

Celina didn't argue and sat on the couch. She picked up a napkin and a piece of pizza. At the first taste, she groaned. Diane laughed while taking a tiny bite of her own piece. For having so much pizza at hand, Diane didn't seem very hungry.

"I think I might have forgotten what real pepperoni tasted like," Celina explained.

"One of the benefits of living on Earth," she replied. "We can be reasonably certain that it _is_ real pepperoni."

Celina laughed and took another large bite. There was a knock on the door. Diane put the piece of pizza back on the table and wiped her hands clean. Celina paused with a piece of pepperoni raised to her mouth. She frowned when there was another knock.

"I'll get it," Diane said and left the room before Celina could swallow and ask any questions. She heard her friend answer the door. "Can I take your jackets?"

"No, no," Celina heard a man answer. "No need. We're still a bit chilly."

This seemed strange to her, since it was rather pleasant outside.

"Oh, alright," Diane said. She heard several sets of feet coming into the room.

"Where is she?" Celina heard a deep female voice ask.

"In the next room," her friend replied. "I ordered pizza."

"Good," the man's voice said. "I'm starving."

There was some laughter and then by the sound of their footsteps, they were returning. Celina lowered the pizza to her lap, wondering what was going on. She frowned when Diane entered nervously with a man and woman behind her.

"Celina," Diane said and Celina swallowed reflexively, "this is Maxwell Jones."

The man smiled as if he had thought of something clever. "And this is his wife, Mary."

"How do you do?" Maxwell asked, stepping forward and offering his hand. He wore leather gloves. Celina found herself simply staring at the hand.

"Pizza grease?" she explained, holding up a hand.

"Don't worry 'bout it," he replied, still holding out his hand, expecting her to shake it. She couldn't think of a reason not to, so shook it and smiled reflexively.

"It's so nice to meet you," Mary said, walking around the table and sitting beside Celina. She tried to surreptitiously scoot a bit away to gain some personal space. The woman had beautiful dusky features and eyes that made you want to trust her. She also wore gloves. Her husband took a seat on the chair beside where his wife sat on the couch. He looked eager, leaning forward with his elbows on his knees, his hands clasped in front of him. Both looked as if they were in their early thirties.

"I asked them to join us for lunch," Diane explained, walking forward and sitting on the chair on the opposite side of the coffee table from Maxwell. Celina noted in a small corner of her mind that she was effectively boxed in on both sides with a coffee table before her and a window behind her. It was that window that helped her keep calm. It was hard to feel trapped when there was a wide window behind her, open for anyone to see in or out. "They want to talk to you about the Minbari."

Celina looked to Diane sharply.

"Celina," the woman to her side reached out and touched her hand. Her gloves felt very warm. Celina wondered why she didn't take off the gloves if they were that hot. She was smiling and didn't take back her hand though Celina had to look uncomfortable with the entire situation. "We met Diane a couple months ago."

"Actually, I met her," Maxwell said, raising a hand slightly.

His wife rolled her eyes. "Max met her at the university. She was very upset. Over you, Celina. For you. And, of course, over the war and what it means for all of us but in this case, specifically for you."

"Diane," Celina asked, not taking her eyes off of Mary, "what did you tell them?"

"Don't be mad," she heard her friend respond. Celina turned and glared at her.

"Maybe it'd be best if you waited in the other room and give Celina a chance to calm down, Diane," Maxwell suggested and Diane nodded quickly as if it were an order and left the room. Celina wondered if it'd be terribly rude if she moved away from Mary and took Diane's vacant seat. As if sensing her thoughts, Mary squeezed her hand.

"I hope you're not mad," Mary said.

"I'm not mad."

"You look mad," Maxwell said.

Celina shook her head slightly. "I'm just surprised. I-I wasn't expecting this. Why are you two wearing gloves?"

Mary looked down at her hands as if just realizing they weren't bare. "Oh, don't worry," she replied. "We aren't Psi Corps."

"Or rogue telepaths," Maxwell added.

"Of course not," Mary laughed.

"Then why are you wearing gloves?" Celina asked again.

"Celina, do you know why we are here?" Mary questioned in return. Her husband was looking at Celina with such intensity that it set her on edge.

"No idea," she replied. "I don't know what Diane told you but-"

"We know where you've been these last few months, Celina," Maxwell said, resting his chin on his clasped hands.

"Why are you here?" she asked.

"Diane thought it'd be a good idea for us to talk to you," Mary explained, still not letting go of Celina's hand. She wondered if the woman intended it to be comforting, because it only felt like she was being held in place.

"We know about the hell Earth Alliance has put you through in name of _interspecies relations_," he said the last as if it were distasteful. "They're using you like a little puppet. Dancing to an alien tune. And they're insulting the sacrifice your grandfather and father made at the Battle of the Line, using that connection to use you. The Minbari nearly wipe us out of existence but the government just leaps at the chance to make friends with them. They're monsters."

"They're worse than monsters," Mary said, looking to Celina seriously. "At least monsters are obvious about being monsters. And everyone knows they are. At least we don't make nice with monsters."

"Are you anti-aliens?" Celina asked, looking between the two.

"No," the woman replied.

"No, of course not," Max added.

"We're just pro-Humanity," Mary explained, with a large smile that said it was a world of difference.

"We understand that you're in a position now that you can't get out of," he continued, leaning forward in his seat eagerly.

"We would help you if we could," his wife said.

"You plan to take me away from where Earth or Minbar can touch me?" Celina questioned. Both of them shook their heads sadly.

"Sorry, no can do," Max said.

"We don't have that kind of power," Mary said.

"Yet," he added, looking to his wife.

"Yet," she agreed with a dangerous smirk.

"Then why are you talking to me?"

Both of them looked back at her. It was Maxwell that answered. "We're giving you an opportunity to really work for Earth's best interest. That's why you entered this, right? To help Earth? Well, we're giving you the opportunity."

"We want you to keep Diane informed as much as you can. About the general activity on the Ingata. Potential weak spots. We also have a few specialists up our sleeves that will be able to track your transmissions to figure the Ingata's position," Mary continued.

"That's all?" Celina asked.

"Yes," Mary said, squeezing her hand as if Celina had already agreed.

"To start," Maxwell replied. "Later, we'll see about more big things. Diane says you seem to be getting very close to your Minbari. Maybe he would let you start getting packages."

"Packages?"

"Yes," the woman stated. "Small things. Little recording devices if we can get them past the Minbari. A way for you to perhaps access more of the database on the Ingata and save it to data crystal so that you can later hand it off to us."

"You wouldn't send bombs, would you?"

"No," she quickly assured. "We'd never do anything that could hurt someone loyal to Earth. We don't want to hurt you."

"Alright, that seems fine," Celina said cautiously, before rising from the couch. Both Max and Mary stood quickly. Mary still hadn't let go of her hand. "I remembered that I told my mom I would be back about now. She'll get worried if I'm late and will call the police shortly after. Ever since she lost my dad, she's been almost paranoid about losing me."

"Then why did she let you go on the Ingata?" Maxwell asked.

Celina shrugged and tried to pull her hand back from Mary. The woman reluctantly let go.

"I think you're trying to make excuses to leave," he said.

"No," she insisted, trying to walk away from them both and around the table without looking like she was retreating. Celina knew she failed horribly. "I-I really just have to get back. My mom and all. And my grandmother's coming over. They'll be worried."

"But your grandmother was over just yesterday," Mary said.

"How do you know that?" she asked, pausing in her movement towards the exit from the living room into the hallway beyond.

"There's one other thing we'd like," Max said, ignoring her question. Neither moved toward Celina and she felt slightly safer with that.

"Alright," she said.

"We'd like you to find out what the Minbari did with our weapons."

It felt like a cold hand had reached into her chest and stopped Celina's heart. "You're Home Guard," she said with dawning horror before thinking.

Both Mary and Max looked to each other worriedly. Apparently, some message passed between the two. It was the type of easy communication between the married. Maxwell looked sincerely saddened but sighed and moved toward Celina. Mary didn't even move.

Celina half turned away and rushed towards the only escape, keeping an eye on Max. She thought she might have been overreacting when he didn't follow her but instead moved towards the audio system across the room.

Hurrying into the hallway, she came to a complete stop at seeing three men waiting in the small corridor, between her and the door. They looked up at her. The music in the next room suddenly blared. Celina realized that no one could hear anything over that. In sheer desperation, she tried to rush the door. It was pathetic how easily she was caught up and wrapped into a tight hold. She fought hard, biting down on a gloved hand trying to cover her mouth and scratching at the nearest face, having to draw blood. Someone kicked her in the back of the knees, causing her to buckle to the ground. Though her teeth clenched down on the leather of the glove, the hand did not pull back and stifled any words. She saw Diane move out of the bedroom at the end of the hall curious at the blaring of the music. Their eyes caught and Diane seemed utterly confused but only stood there, staring as the man tried to pull his hand out of Celina's clenched teeth. She let go so that she could breathe. For a moment, her mouth was free and she took a large breath but before she could do more a cold, damp cloth was placed over her mouth and nose. She held her breath and fought against it for a moment but eventually took several frenzied breaths to struggle. Quickly she became dizzy and weak. The world around her seemed to close in, becoming the long hallway with Diane standing at the end, just watching in horrified detachment. She squinted her eyes at her to fight off the disorienting feeling and hoped that Diane understood that she would never be forgiven for this.

Celina closed her eyes and embraced the momentary darkness, knowing she was already as good as dead.

-----

Thank you for reading. I would dearly appreciate it if you'd take a moment to make my day and leave me a note telling me what you thought of my story. If you leave an email to contact you by, I would like to thank you for reading and answer any questions you may wish to pose.

Please continue on to the next chapter . . .


	18. Chapter 18

**Chapter Eighteen:**

_"When it is time, come to this place. Call our name. We will be here."_   
- First Ones: "Voices of Authority"

-----

Neroon was standing behind a warrior running a diagnostic on the communication systems. They had received a transmission a short time before and were now checking to make sure there had been no technical viruses contained in the transmission. Normally, they wouldn't have, since it was relayed from the Gray Council, but Branmer had ordered so. Now, the Alyt was hovering over the warrior's shoulder because he had nothing better to do than amuse himself with making the other nervous.

This particular Minbari was very good at covering his nervousness. The only way that Neroon could tell it was there was that he would clench his jaw so tight a muscle would throb in his neck with his pulse. Neroon smiled to himself, watching as the diagnostic ran. He looked up as another Minbari walked up to him. The Alyt sensed the Minbari running the diagnostic relax with relief once Neroon was told that Branmer wanted him to report to the Shai'Alyt's quarters immediately.

He ignored the teasing look the Minbari messenger gave the other at his obvious relief and quickly went to Branmer's quarters. Neroon was sure it had something to do with the last transmission and probably not good if the Shai'Alyt had used the word 'immediately'.

The door opened quickly when he pressed the alert beside it. He felt himself lift his brow at that interesting bit. Branmer was standing beside the large console on the wall beside the closed entrance into his sleeping quarters. The screen was paused on the Minbari Federation insignia. The lights had been lowered, but that did not overly surprise Neroon. Branmer had often complained that his eyes couldn't focus on the screen if there were glare from other lights in the room. The Shai'Alyt looked deeply troubled. Again, not surprising after a transmission from the Gray Council. He knew Branmer had had disagreements with them but usually never brought Neroon into it.

The Shai'Alyt looked up and seemed to notice Neroon was standing at attention two feet inside the room.

'Neroon,' Branmer began, motioning for him to come forward. The Alyt relaxed at the familiarity and came closer. 'Celina Amador didn't return home nine days ago.'

He wasn't certain how he was expected to react to that, so he didn't react at all. Neroon simply continued to look expectantly to the Shai'Alyt, waiting for more information, since Branmer had used the tone of voice that suggested that that was simply the beginning of it.

'Seven days ago, Earth Alliance received a recorded message. It was timed to be sent from a public location at that date and all history of who sent it was erased. The message was for us as well,' Branmer explained. 'The Gray Council only received this information this morning. I believe you deserve to see it.'

Neroon gave one short nod and looked to the console as Branmer stepped forward and activated it. The Shai'Alyt stepped aside and moved to stand a short distance behind Neroon, so that he could watch the screen and the Alyt at the same time. Neroon was very aware of Branmer watching him and held his face void of any expression but intent observation as he followed the screen switch to a new insignia. He didn't recognize it. The screen switched again to a large dark room.

A man walked up to the camera. His gait was surly. He was obviously human though his face had been blurred post-recording. Neroon automatically had no respect for the man's intent to show daring when he did not even take the risk to show his true face. He had even less respect for him once he began to speak.

"We want to send a message to Earth Alliance," the man's voice was also altered to sound inhuman and completely untraceable. "The cowards who betray Earth to alien causes. But this is also a message to the vultures who prey on us, the aliens who wrongly influence them."

It was difficult to understand him with the voice alteration, wiping away most distinctions of natural accent and adding an unnatural one. Neroon followed though as the man continued to belittle the recent efforts of Earth Alliance administration. The man insisted that resources were being misused, efforts wasted on aliens that should have been focused on Earth's own people. Strangely, though Neroon knew that man was voicing anti-Minbari sentiment, the man became most ruthless when speaking of how Earth Alliance was handling cross-species relations. Neroon quickly became frustrated with his lack of ability to follow all of what the man was saying. He wished he understood the language better because he knew that if Branmer were showing him this, it was important that Neroon witness it, not simply be told what it contained. Neroon refocused his attention when the man made reference to an "innocent woman."

"Ruined. Crawled into her mind and all that she was, a true patriot of Earth, died there," the man continued walking down the expanse of the room with the camera following, looking over his shoulder to continue talking. "She wanted to serve Earth and the current administration took her and forgot her on a Minbari ship. They abandoned her. They betrayed her to the enemy. They killed her. There's nothing left now of what she was. All that made her unique, special, _Human_ . . .gone. She's not the first and she won't be the last. But we will make sure that she does serve Humanity, even if the government wouldn't let her and the aliens twisted her into something else, something unclean, something not worth living. We will do that for her because that's what the real her would have wanted. We will do this because she was our sister. And we love her. And she will do this for us, her brothers and sisters of Earth. We will all send a personal message to you." He came to a stop. A woman –Celina, Neroon's mind quickly supplemented- was tied to a chair. A dark bag was over her head. He wondered if it was hard for her to breathe. The man walked forward and pulled the bag off her head. Her hair pulled away into a mess, face gray. She blinked a great deal, keeping her eyes to the floor. She cringed as the man spoke again. "Whatever you try to take away from us, we will destroy it before letting you keep it. We will not go gentle into that good night. You will feel our rage before the dying of the light."

Neroon wondered why the man even looked into the camera if he wasn't allowing his face to be shown. The man walked behind Celina and the camera moved forward. She looked up and watched as he came near her, finally disappearing behind her where she could not see. She didn't struggle or seem to put forth any fight. Neroon was sure that she must have before though. He couldn't see her as being complacent in this. Celina looked resigned and detached as the man took a hold of her chin from behind and pulled her head back against his stomach. Her eyes were looking up, perhaps into the face of the man holding her. Neroon couldn't tell if the man had looked down at her, his face too blurred. He pulled out a large knife from behind his back and held the tip against the opposite side of her throat; best for a tearing motion, Neroon recognized, not slicing. Neroon could see Celina swallow beside the knife held to her throat. He could also just barely see the pulse in the side of her neck. It beat so rapidly that Neroon knew she was terrified. The camera came closer.

"This is your warning and our promise," the man finally said and pulled the knife savagely. Immediately blood splattered the camera and Neroon was utterly indignant that he could no longer see past it. Intellectually, he knew Celina had to be dead, but he still wanted to see her face. He was frowning fiercely when the screen went black and there would be nothing further from it.

'They found her body four days ago in some sort of warehouse. It was a little over a mile from her home,' Branmer explained. Neroon turned to look at him and his desire to have seen her face to be sure must have somehow been detectable by the Shai'Alyt since he added, 'They sent us no photographic documentation of that. It is generally believed that that recording is enough.'

'Savages,' Neroon muttered.

'He seemed to be under the impression that it was a mercy,' Branmer noted and the Alyt looked to him darkly.

'Then why did he use a knife and tear out her throat? I know that is not the most painless way of killing a human. Not the quickest either. She would have been aware several moments after the fact, bleeding out and suffocating in the same instant. If it were a mercy, why did he not use a swifter weapon?'

'It would not have been so gloriously brutal, so jarringly savage,' Branmer explained, biting out the words. 'It would not evoke the same primitive revulsion in us all. This is exactly how he wished us to react.'

Neroon furrowed his brow at the thought.

'The ramifications of this have disturbed the Gray Council,' the Shai'Alyt continued. 'You have been summoned.'

The Alyt looked up sharply at that. It was a great honor to be summoned by the Gray Council. Somehow, he could not collect the proper amount of satisfaction at the fact but hoped that their wisdom would ease his confusion and unsettlement. Branmer seemed momentarily taken aback when Neroon asked for a copy of the message. By the time the Ingata met with the Valen'tha, the Gray Counsel's flagship, Neroon had studied the message until he knew exactly what the man had said and could quote it from memory if he so wished. Though he knew that was exactly what the man had wanted, Neroon stored away the message in the back of his mind, an example of Humanity's barbarism. To turn so viciously on one's own kind . . . especially under the seemingly just guise of preserving what was right . . . he could not understand it. Neroon dearly hoped he never would. It was an awareness unbefitting his kind.

-----

The room was dark with a single beam of light falling straight from the high ceiling to form a circle at the center of the room. Tiny dust motes caught in the air blinked in the beam of light, seeming more than magical. Neroon drew a long silent breath, adjusting himself to the overwhelming rush of the sacred. He walked forward and took his place in the ring of light defined by the darkness.

For several moments, he was alone.

Then nine beams of light fell from the ceiling to surround him. Nine gray hooded figures stood in the beams of light against the blackness beyond. It was an impressive display. Intellectually, Neroon knew they had not appeared from within the beams of light, but his heart clung to the mysticism. He was now surrounded by the best of them, somewhere amongst the nine the Chosen of Dukhat stood with him. They breathed in the same magic in the air, drank the same blessings of the meeting, and played the holy roles set before them by Valen. Neroon saluted and was surprised to be saluted in return in the ways of each of their castes.

'Alyt Neroon of the Star Rider's Clan,' a deep male voice spoke in Adrihi'e, the old language the three castes' main languages were rooted in. 'We summon you to us to speak of unpleasant things. Some time ago, the Religious caste began a series of events that brought us here. A part of that will end here as well. Once all is said within this chamber, these distasteful things will never be spoken of again.'

Neroon was slightly confused what that last sentence involved but continued to listen as another spoke. He noticed that none had lowered their hoods, hiding their faces away. This disturbed him on some level but he was unsure of whether this were any different from how the council always behaved.

'We have demanded great sacrifices from you, Alyt,' another spoke in a small feminine voice. 'You have conducted yourself with honor, wisdom, and selflessness. You gave more than we dared ask. You have proven yourself worthy of our great respect and admiration. We will not forget this though we will not speak of it again.'

'We are disturbed by the events unfolded on Earth,' a musical male voice said from behind him. Neroon turned around to face the speaker though he could not tell which hooded figure was speaking. 'There was much disagreement on how to best handle this. Should we allow this hateful action against Minbar to be made public and allow blame to fall on the Earthers? Should we acknowledge this and offer our forgiveness? We could not decide. Until it was suggested that it would be best that we had never made the decision in the first place. There, the Nine were one.'

'All documentation of the arranged marriage between an Alyt of Minbar and a daughter of Earth will be destroyed.'

Neroon blinked at the announcement, a frown cutting deeply across his face. Another continued before the first's words sunk through his shock and repulsion.

'Her name will be wiped from your clan's records. Any mention of her in relation to you will be erased. The troubles of the last several months will never have been. Those who might have remembered otherwise will seem to forget.'

'This is the wisdom of the Gray?' Neroon asked into the silence. It was the first moment he dared to speak. 'To forget where you erred? What wisdom is to be gained in this?'

None responded for several moments but they stood rigid. He felt their discord with him but held his resolve and did not lower his eyes.

'Neroon, do not believe that we do not feel,' a strong female voice said from his side. He turned to look towards her. There were three figures that could have been speaking. 'We feel greatly where we have erred. We feel where we have failed you. We feel where we have angered you. But we have learned that we must not always act according to such things.'

'Do you even understand why I am angry?' he asked, personally seeking out the woman who was daring to patronize him.

'We are asking for your sacrifices to be forgotten. We understand that that is disheartening for you after such a long struggle.'

Neroon smiled sardonically. 'I am sure I will sacrifice much more in my life. It is my honor and my privaledge. But it is also my right for it to be remembered!'

'You are angry for your wife,' the woman replied in breathless understanding.

'You offer great compliments to my character. Yet, what of Celina Amador's? She sacrificed as greatly and in the end sacrificed her life.You would have every mention of her erased. You would do her the dishonor of choosing to lay her aside and forget, for it is easier than to face the ramifications of your actions. You hide your faces and your voices and again you kill her, but yours is the most ruthless weapon. She is not here to feel the sting of it, but she is also not here to forgive it.'

Eight lights went black, one after another, until there was only Neroon and the gray speaker cast in their separate lights.

'You have angered them, Neroon,' the woman said. 'They know you speak the truth and for that it will be a long while until they forgive you for it. This may be the last time you ever speak before the Gray Council.'

Neroon glared at her though her hood was still drawn. 'I would rather appear before the Gray Council once and speak the truth than come to you again and again in falsehoods.'

'Even though you may have done more good with prettier words?' she asked.

'I find I prefer actions to pretty words,' he said, realizing he was espousing a sentiment he first heard Celina's voice speak. If he thought about it, he could still hear her say it.

'We underestimated you, Neroon,' she said, pulling back her hood. He took a step back at the young and beautiful face. A very recognizable face. She seemed to exude a self-awareness that bordered on hubris. Before him stood Satai Delenn of the Family Mir, Chosen of Dukhat, and she seemed every bit aware of it as Neroon was. Still, he refused to acknowledge that. 'We asked for you to give yourself to her in duty. There was something we failed to realize.'

Neroon waited several moments and was frustrated that she was going to make him ask, 'What is that?'

'Duty is where your heart is. Where one goes, the other follows. You were _not_ supposed to care for her, Neroon. Forgive us.'

He sneered slightly at the pitiful centure and plea from the delicate woman bearing such a heavy title. Neroon shied away from thinking deeper on her words. 'Tell me, Satai Delenn, if you will so that I may come to understand your wisdom. Does it become easier each time you recount your decisions until you finally believe to get it right?'

Her face went stony with the sarcasm and bite in his tone and words. 'Understanding is not required of you,' she said in a cold deliverance, 'only obedience.'

Delenn's light blinked into darkness and Neroon was left in the light, dust circling about him and catching and shattering the ray. He stood for several moments, doubting the enlightenment of the Gray. The Alyt did not wish to think that the greatest of them could conduct themselves without honor for any wisdom but their own. Their hubris was blinding to more than simply themselves. The Gray Council of Dukhat was gone. In its place was a new council based on the mercurial guidance from Delenn of Mir.

It took him an indeterminate amount of time surrounded by the echoing darkness before he realized he was in a position to do nothing. His power was negligable in the face of the Nine's will.

Celina Amador sacrificed nothing in the name of peace. She never came to the Ingata. Neroon would not be allowed to mourn his wife's death as his respect for her might have demanded because he never had a wife. He would never be allowed to speak of her. The Alyt was breaking the Gray Council's order to even remember her.

Now that the Nine were fallible in his eyes, Neroon delighted in breaking their orders within the safety of his mind and heart. Both refused to forget all the actions and words, hiding it all away in the same place where he guarded the words of Celina's murderer. Though he would never be able to speak of it, to those who knew, his thoughts were loud. Finally he walked away with quiet rage as he abandoned his place of light in the Gray Council's chamber of darkness. The light shone at his back as if waiting for his return.

-----

Fin

-----

Thank you for reading What Is Not Forgotten. I must say, none of the events in this story were/are meant to be taken as an opinion on terrorism in the news of today. These are simply the events of the story. I would dearly appreciate it if you'd take a moment to make my day and leave me a note telling me what you thought of my story. Though the story is done and you are no longer reliant upon me updating, hearing what the reader thought means a great deal to me. If you leave an email to contact you by, I would like to thank you for reading and answer any questions you may wish to pose.


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